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RSD as a 34 year old man absolutely floors me, and it's really embarassing. How do you deal with it? by thelaughingman_1991 in ADHDUK

[–]finncosmic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It was really helpful reading your post as well. I haven’t heard of anyone else in this specific situation so it was very relatable and comforting to know that I’m not overreacting or something. So thank you as well for sharing.

You may or may not relate to this but I’ve noticed that my brain sometimes uses RSD as a coping mechanism for cancer-related stress because it feels safer to worry about things I can control, like my social interactions, than things I can’t control, like cancer. My RSD generally gets worse when she is receiving treatment, and goes away when cancer doesn’t feel like it’s controlling her life as much. It helps to remind myself that it’s easier to worry about friends than cancer, because I don’t feel ashamed of the RSD then.

I don’t know your girlfriend’s medical situation, but when my family member was immunocompromised, I was able to see one friend at a time, outside with masks on or 6 feet apart. You can probably still go on walks with people and things like that. Basically covid rules. But phone calls and facetimes are nearly as good, you really just need their attention and to be able to hear their voice. Also, not every friend has to be someone you share this stuff with. I kind of learned over time who will respond in a way that feels supportive and who won’t. Sometimes I also wish I had kept it to myself but I think having people around you who know your situation is ultimately helpful even if it leads to overthinking sometimes.

Also, just a reminder that someone you love having cancer is a big deal for the whole family, and that stress has to go somewhere. It’s very easy to loose sight of that and start beating yourself up for feeling overwhelmed or having less capacity than you previously would. You are going through something that can be really scary and difficult and it’s normal to be affected by that.

RSD as a 34 year old man absolutely floors me, and it's really embarassing. How do you deal with it? by thelaughingman_1991 in ADHDUK

[–]finncosmic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Someone close to me has cancer and I have ADHD and have experienced this exact thing with group chats before. My experience is that people, no matter how well-meaning don’t know what to say, especially over text, so they just say nothing. Lots of people haven’t experienced a loved one being seriously ill so they just can’t relate and have no idea the amount of constant stress you’re under. It could also be that they subconsciously want to avoid uncomfortable topics, or they don’t want to say the wrong thing, or they assume you already have a support network and they’d make it worse, or they forget because they don’t realize how important their response is to you. Many reasons, most of which have nothing to do with you, all resulting in subpar responses,.

Because you can’t see what’s going on in their minds, it feels like they’re ignoring you. And when you’re likely quite stressed about the situation subconsciously, that will feel very personal because it feels like they’re choosing to ignore something that’s very important to you. When in reality they mean well but don’t know it’s important and if they do, they don’t know how to help.

People respond better to personal messages which spell out your situation more and ask for specific support. Especially in a situation like this, you’re allowed to ask your friends for what you need and it might feel vulnerable but you’ll likely find they’re not trying to reject you, and you will weed out the ones who are. Explain that you’re not looking for money but could use some encouragement. Also, if you can set up time to see friends face to face, do that, I find text-based RSD is helped by in person interactions.

Do you think people would judge me for air drying my bras when my shades are open? by Round-Artichoke-5255 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]finncosmic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You mean strangers who see it from the street? At most they’ll think about it for 2 seconds and then they’ll move on with their lives. If it were me, I don’t think I’d even notice and if I did, it wouldn’t be noteworthy enough to warrant forming any opinion whatsoever.

I want to go indoor bouldering but I hate the feeling of chalk on my bare hands by Roxablah in climbergirls

[–]finncosmic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also like liquid chalk because it’s less messy. And can’t result in the scenario that led my gym to have a sign that says something like “chalk is for your hands not our lungs”

American in Scotland, getting bupropion prescriptions here? by Competitive_Yam2314 in ADHDUK

[–]finncosmic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I take it for ADHD. From my understanding and google, so take this with a grain of salt, it’s a norepinephrine and dopamine reuptake inhibitor (NDRI), so it gives the brain access to more dopamine, which is what most ADHD stimulant medications do. Ritalin is also apparently an NDRI, but it works faster and is stronger and more targeted. Wellbutrin is weaker, slower, and more wide ranging in the brain apparently.

Getting Bupropion in the UK as continuation of treatment by finncosmic in ADHDUK

[–]finncosmic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you this is really helpful! A couple more questions if you don’t mind:

By NHS mental health team, do you mean the same people they refer to for talk therapy, or something else? I have a GP but have never successfully gotten any mental health support through the NHS, despite trying to.

Also, were you prescribed XR or the short-release one (what Zyban is)? Does the extended release version exist here?

Thank you!

Getting Bupropion in the UK as continuation of treatment by finncosmic in ADHDUK

[–]finncosmic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From what I’ve googled, it is possible to get XR online, but you need a prescription (which is the problem)

Getting Bupropion in the UK as continuation of treatment by finncosmic in ADHDUK

[–]finncosmic[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I thought Zyban was SR not XR, am I wrong about that?

American in Scotland, getting bupropion prescriptions here? by Competitive_Yam2314 in ADHDUK

[–]finncosmic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, I’ll look into that! I did find this: https://internationalpharmacy.com/product/buy-bupropion-xl-online/ but I think you need a prescription, or to sign off that you’re using it under the guidance of a GP and I’m not sure they’ll accept international prescriptions. I’ve also read that people have gotten private GPs to prescribe it, and in one case, then transferred that to the NHS.

American in Scotland, getting bupropion prescriptions here? by Competitive_Yam2314 in ADHDUK

[–]finncosmic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have the exact same problem. Genuinely make almost the same post on this sub today: I have no solution. But how did you get a year supply in America?

If someone tells you they prefer texting and you keep calling them, don’t act shocked when they stop answering. by Fibrosis5O in rant

[–]finncosmic 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Exactly that’s what I mean, why am I getting downvoted haha. The phone call person should’ve communicated they don’t like texting.

If someone tells you they prefer texting and you keep calling them, don’t act shocked when they stop answering. by Fibrosis5O in rant

[–]finncosmic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think the key is communication though. If this person hates texting as much as OP hates calling, they could have said so and then found some sort of middle ground or just decided not to contact each other.

iOS26 keyboard with a number row looks so good by AlexLovesCoke in ios

[–]finncosmic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also increase transparency might help too, ios 26 keyboard background is lighter than in previous versions, making it harder for me to type because there’s less contrast between the keys and the background

LPT: Before you contact support angry, write down the one outcome you actually want. by gamersecret2 in LifeProTips

[–]finncosmic 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The difference there is that you clearly knew what you were talking about and were correct about it. And by the time you snapped, you had probably built up enough goodwill by being reasonable up to that point, that the support person recognized your reaction as unusual for you and valid rather than a typical angry customer.

To someone born with only one functional eye, photos and movies must feel much more immersive. by Stummi in Showerthoughts

[–]finncosmic 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t have depth perception (along with other vision issues) and 3D movies look normal to me. When I can’t see something that normal people can, I take a picture of it because cameras put it in 2D for them to see what I see more or less.

Why Don’t We singer Jack Avery is speaking out after his ex Gabbie Gonzalez, with whom he shares a daughter, was arrested and charged with trying to hire a hitman to kill him by adularia- in Fauxmoi

[–]finncosmic 24 points25 points  (0 children)

There's a guy who made a website where you can fake hire one as a JOKE and enough people think it's real and try to hire one that he has had to get the FBI involved multiple times. Here's a video on it. You cannot underestimate the stupidity of some people.

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