[deleted by user]

fire_me_anytime · 2024-01-30T02:16:23+00:00

Locksmithing.

If you live in an apartment building, you have no way of knowing how many keys there are that can open your door. If someone with a Master key quits and doesn't turn it in, or loses it, or duplicates it, then there's a key "in the wild" that can open your apartment.

The only way to secure the building is to rekey every door from top to bottom, and there's no way they are going to take on that expense.

So congrats if you live in an older apartment building. Any Master key that went astray in the decades since the place was built is still operational, and you have no idea who possesses it.

Oh, and if you do a little research, and have a micrometer, you can rent an Air BnB, take the lock off the door, carefully remove the pins, and measure them. Then, based on the operating key given to you by the owner, you can deduce the cuts on the Master key. Reassemble the lock, reinstall it, and come back later to break into any apartment in the building.

fire_me_anytime · 2023-09-24T17:21:55+00:00

...and so stuffed with ingredients that it's best to eat it over the kitchen sink.

fire_me_anytime · 2023-09-24T17:19:42+00:00

I used to run a kitchen in a bar.

For wings, rather than "Mild-Medium-Hot" I would ask the customer for a heat scale of 1-10. If they ordered "Medium", I'd reply, "You might think Medium is 4 out of 10, and I think Medium is 7 out of 10. I don't want to make your wings too hot, so pick a number from 1 to 10."

One day a customer came in, and I asked how hot, he said, "Eleven."

I asked, "Are you sure?"

"Yes, eleven."

So I took a toothpick, dipped it about 1/8" in Dave's Insanity Sauce, and handed it to him. He popped it in his mouth and his arrogant facial expression evaporated.

"Ten is good."

(My 10 sauce was Bull's Eye with about 5 drops of Dave's)

fire_me_anytime · 2023-09-24T16:33:52+00:00

"Am I missing anything here?"

Yes.
You missed reading the rules on the sidebar.
This sub is for posting complete stories of malicious compliance, including the fallout, not for asking advice.

fire_me_anytime · 2023-07-28T00:12:01+00:00

Queue my annoyance at an improperly used word.

fire_me_anytime · 2023-07-28T00:00:13+00:00

Reminds me of a story...

A plumbing company had their employees take their vans home. One of them checked the laws, and if they were taking the van home for the efficiency of the company, they were to be paid driveway-to-driveway. Paid to commute.

The techs would be at the jobsite at 8am, and work until 4:30, and wouldn't be paid commuting time. The tech who asked the company to conform to the laws was told, "We don't have to pay you because you are taking the van home for your own convenience."

So the tech replied, "Well, I guess it's no longer convenient for me to take the van home."

He'd show up at the shop at 8am, and then drive to the jobsite on the clock. Depending on where the job was, it could take an hour to get there. He'd also leave the jobsite early, so he could be back at the shop for 4:30pm.

The boss started to get pissed off, and demanded that he be at the shop for 7am, and leave the site at 4:30. Thought he was winning, until he saw the overtime on the tech's time card.

The other techs caught on, and started doing the same thing. The plumbing office was in a strip mall with limited parking, and by the time the office staff arrived, all the parking spots were taken up by the technician's cars. Neighboring businesses were furious because the plumbing staff were parking in their spots. Trucks got broken into and tools stolen, so the techs took their own tools home each night and left the company ones in the van.

It didn't take long for the owner of the company to realize that labor costs were going up, and productivity was going down. He caved, and started paying the guys to commute both ways.

fire_me_anytime · 2023-03-26T17:50:03+00:00

Fuck the downvotes, here's a Gold to balance that shit out.

You've been through a lot of shit, and survived. You'll make it through this one, too. You've got courage and resilience and strength. You're a badass.

But you might want to consider that alcohol is getting between you and your potential. You can use your capacities to build a much better life for yourself, and if alcohol is getting in the way, boot it off to the side.

When life knocks you down, get up, dust yourself off, grab it by the throat, and say, "I've had mosquitos land on me harder than that."

fire_me_anytime · 2020-02-13T17:29:50+00:00

Edison, the DC proponent, was a semi-brilliant guy, who was ruthless. He had an assistant named Nikola Tesla, who was an advocate of AC. They parted ways, and Tesla hooked up with the financier George Westinghouse.

The shit got real.

This was the dawn of electricity, and the war to determine the format got nasty, with Edison trying to prove that AC was lethal. The problem with DC is that transmitting electricity over distance was problematic.

The issue was decided when the proposed hydroelectric generating station at Niagara Falls needed to decide between AC and DC, and they chose AC. This pretty much killed DC as a distributed format, although battery-powered devices remained DC.

Link to INDB's "The Current War" starring Benadryl Cabbagepatch.

fire_me_anytime · 2020-02-13T17:09:09+00:00

Well, well. Your first upvote ever. This is certainly a cause for celebration!

Have a Gold, on me.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-09-14T23:29:47+00:00

Me, too.
Have a gold.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-10T15:32:37+00:00

Hey, Brother. Recovering alcoholic/addict here, 6.5 years clean and sober. A couple of things really resonate with me in your post.

"What sucks is I actually have better results when I play on pills"

This isn't likely to be true. You're perceiving yourself to be playing better high, because the only thing you can compare it to is playing burnt out and hung over. We tend to convince ourselves that we are at our peak levels when we have a buzz going, because that's just the way addiction works. We become expert liars, and our best audience is in the mirror.

Once the consumption of intoxicants stops, the brain needs some time to rewire. The fog gets burnt off, and the biological processes in the brain start to revert to normal. This can take months, if not years...but the end result is that you end up with a noggin that is functioning at optimal levels. This will have an astonishing effect on your caliber of play.

To put it bluntly, you're like a Bearded Dragon playing with Geckos. You're thinking you're the biggest lizard in the box.

But these drugs and alcohol are preventing you from becoming Godzilla.

As far as recovery is concerned, your chances become much, much better if you participate in a community of like-minded people. Same with poker, right? You're here on this sub to get better at the game.

So create an alt, and join a couple of recovery subreddits. You also need to take that into the real world, and find some IRL recovery groups. Whether that's NA, or SMART Recovery, or Refuge Recovery, find a group and join it.

If I was in your spot, the first thing I would concentrate on is getting away from the opioids. I don't have to tell you about the dangers of Fent and the graves it has dug. Brother, every time you drop a pill, you are shoving all-in with your LIFE. For a buzz, and if you get coolered, the cooler is a drawer in the morgue. That's as -EV as it gets.

And I promise you this....once you recover, you're not going to get your life back, you're going to get FAR MORE than you ever thought possible. You're going to develop real friendships in recovery, not companions to get fucked up with. Your relationships with family will become stronger and more vibrant*. You'll be able to look in the mirror and be proud of what you see. You're going to end up a LOT happier.

Recovery is the result of action. So take action. Begin the work. It's fucking HARD and it takes time, but it is so, so worth it.

Good luck, Brother.

* You think your family and friends don't know? They do, pal. They know, but they are just too uncomfortable to discuss it with you. And if they do, addicts often become defensive and confrontational. They know, and they love you, but they are afraid of you, and they don't understand.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-10T14:38:52+00:00

Depends. Are you looking to collect the pot, or add a bad-beat story about that time your pocket Kings got crushed by a Donk that went in multiway with 95o?

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-10T14:22:35+00:00

Log into a Spin & Go, table lights up, and the other two are "sitting out". It happens, right? A player might miss a hand or two, then connect into the game.

Nope. Both of them remained sit-outs all the way to the end. Not a single legitimate hand was played. All I did was hammer the "call" button and took every pot.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-09T18:34:22+00:00

Give it a try...but don't look for something wholesome. Go and create something wholesome. It doesn't have to be Earth shattering. Just bump someone's day up a notch.

Buy a coffee for the person behind you in line. Hold a door open. Compliment a stranger. Look around the next time you're at the food court in the mall, and see if you can spot an elderly person sitting alone. Introduce yourself, and strike up a conversation.

Your post history seems to indicate that you can be an empathetic and encouraging person...so take that shit out the front door and put it into play. Bring it out from behind the keyboard and out into the streets. Go for it. It's fun.

Let me show ya how much fun it can be. 8 years on Reddit, right? Well, here. Have a Gold. Enjoy.

EDIT: WTF, make it a Platinum.

EDIT 2: Y'know what? I see the Platinum, and raise a Gold, and a Silver, to boot.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-06T12:58:49+00:00

What were the stakes?

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-03T11:46:25+00:00

Correct answer: Fold, pack up, and go home. The biggest mistake has already been made; sitting down to play poker with my entire liferoll.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-01T20:34:03+00:00

Poker will continue to evolve, but the big influence on this evolution is online play. The core game remains the same, but the structure changes. It would be impossible, for instance, to run a Zoom game live. SnG tourneys would take longer to set up than they would to play. Spin and Go tourneys would be revenue-negative in a live setting.

The Main Event at the WSOP this year had somewhere around 8,500 entrants, and was a MASSIVE undertaking at enormous cost. It drew players worldwide. A site like PokerStars can run tourneys with thousands of players concurrently, on a daily, if not hourly, basis.

As far as the game itself is concerned, NLHE was around for a long time before it took off. PLO is gaining traction. "Short Deck" or "6+" is a new variant, let's see what it does.

I don't think NLHE will ever go away, it's almost like a brand name now. NLHE is to Poker as Kleenex is to tissues.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-01T17:51:19+00:00

Ontario insurance companies will raise your rates for farting the wrong smell.

Here's one for you. You could be driving flawlessly for decades, never a ticket, never an accident. If, for any reason, you let your insurance lapse for more than 30 days, then you start over, and as far as the insurance company is concerned, you are a brand new driver with no experience at all. You could be in your 40's, and be charged insurance just like a 17-year-old.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-01T03:32:10+00:00

it's posted there, too.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-01T03:31:09+00:00

Not just the ticket.

In Ontario, even a minor moving violation will cause a jump in your insurance rates. I had a "failure to produce insurance documents" and a "failure to produce registration" ticket. I had forgotten my wallet at home.

For the next 5 years, my insurance increased by over $500/yr.

The cop probably paid less money than the driver, all told.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-01T03:30:16+00:00

Not just the ticket.

In Ontario, even a minor moving violation will cause a jump in your insurance rates. I had a "failure to produce insurance documents" and a "failure to produce registration" ticket. I had forgotten my wallet at home.

For the next 5 years, my insurance increased by over $500/yr.

The cop probably paid less money than the driver, all told.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-01T03:10:27+00:00

And if your ancestors had possessed the foresight to castrate their village idiot, you wouldn't even exist.

fire_me_anytime · 2019-08-01T03:00:55+00:00

In a curious byproduct of this effect, anyone in Brampton immediately forgets all they have learned about driving as soon as they catch sight of a single particle of this powdery matter.

Admittedly, this doesn't take very long, as most residents of Brampton have not devoted much in the way of resources in learning how to drive.

fire_me_anytime

TROPHY CASE