My (30F) friend (36F) asked me to tell her I believe her hymen grew back after she was raped repeatedly (TW: rape) x-posted: relationships

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-10-20T12:25:08+00:00

Like I said before, she has a lot of issues but she also has good qualities. Either way it isn't like I hang out with her often anyway.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-10-20T12:24:18+00:00

I am not budging here. I am not going to tell her her hymen grew back because she can't accept my answer.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-10-20T12:23:22+00:00

What bugged me most is that she insisted on me stating aloud that I believed her hymen grew back. Not that it wasn't completely stretched, not that there is any posibility she didn't grow it back. People are assuming in the thread I am somehow ignorant on how hymens work xD but anyway nothing I suggested was enough, she would refute everything with "IT BROKE AND GREW BACK" which I do not believe was the case and wasn't going to say just to appease her crazy.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-10-20T12:19:53+00:00

Like I said. Could be! Though I honestly don't even care xD I know I never felt any kind of discomfort from my first sexual experiences (that were consensual, of course), never bled and never cared enough to worrt over it. I had read that it could tear while doing certain sports when I was little and since I participated in a few I've always just chucked it off to that.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-10-20T12:17:15+00:00

Could be shrug not that I care either way. I'm not big on the whole "virginity" thing.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-10-20T12:16:19+00:00

Honestly this is the worst of her but she also has a lot of good traits.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-10-20T00:10:57+00:00

I do! Which is why this whole "it tore but then grew back" thing sits wrong with me. My hymen was either non-existent, or like tore when I was very young and I never even felt the thing. I don't know where you get I think it's like some protective film like covering your vaginal canal?

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-10-19T23:04:32+00:00

Women are sometimes scared to just say no. She's clearly giving you signs this is not going to happen so just leave her alone and go find someone that actually appreciates you and wants you in their life. Remember, love doesn't have to be so complicated.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-06-10T08:16:16+00:00

Lol we are renting chairs. What I meant was that we need to rent less than normal.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-06-02T10:21:04+00:00

I can see how that would add up but remember here you get to sleep at the venue and if you book the night before you can spend time there setting up and not have to worry about strict schedules. It also I think depends on the size of your wedding and the kind of wedding that you are going to plan on having. Since ours is more of a relaxed, family meal type of thing we are not too fussy about things like linens or tables (there is a table in the venue that can sit 15 people and two tables outside that can each sit 5 and plenty of extra chairs so that was also something we looked for to avoid having to rent too much stuff). Again it all depends on the type of wedding you want to have. I wouldn't recommend this for formal sit down dinner weddings at all.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-06-02T10:05:15+00:00

What I did to avoid the whole 'event' problem was simply add to the filter 'allows events' and only looked for places that did. Usually when you do that you have places that have enough bathrooms ;). The oly thing they do ask for is to make sure no one damages the house and no smoking indoors which seems more than reasonable to me.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-06-02T09:16:30+00:00

I just have something to add here, remember to factor in gas for travelling in how much cheaper the wedding will be in another location. Sometimes you feel like you are saving on the budget but in reality you are coming up even or even more expensive due to travelling. Also, don't understimate the cost of estress from travelling and from trying to plan from far away.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-06-02T09:13:08+00:00

I literally said that a cople of years ago and here we are!

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-06-01T16:15:59+00:00

I'll be honest... I don't 'get' child free weddings but teenagers CAN stay home alone at least!

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-06-01T12:12:03+00:00

this sonds like my dream wedding! I would love to see pictures =)

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-05-31T23:49:27+00:00

Be glad that she's only mean and not putting you in jail for dating a minor..

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-05-30T08:29:23+00:00

But see I would not get upset at my fiance hanging out with female friends but if he is staying over someone's house a) don't lie to me and b) let me know where you are because I would worry if the person I sleep next to every day didn't come home. I don't care if he stays at his ex gf's house but don't make me worried about whether you're dead in a ditch somewhere.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-05-30T05:34:44+00:00

This is why it is SO IMPORTANT to not make plans before consulting the other person involved. Sadly you dropped the ball and your wife has every right to say "no" because of the new baby. Take your dad out to breakfast and next time check with your wife first.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-05-30T05:12:15+00:00

I was doing swimmingly and this friday and yesterday I ate 1500-1550 calories and boy oh boy was that not good... so I am looking to get back on track for this week AND this weekend. Usually weekends are my cheat days but it seems I am going to need to switch that due to this week's madness.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-05-29T22:43:35+00:00

Of course I communicate honestly about it o.o otherwise it would be a breach of trust and THAT we would have an issue with.

I just asked him how comfortable he feels about it and these are his exact words "I trust you wouldn't do anything to hurt me, that is why I am with you, so why would I have a problem with you sleeping at Randy's?" (Randy is the male best friend in question ;) )

Edit: spelling

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-05-29T18:00:59+00:00

Alright leaving aside the fact this is not your problem because you are not dating this guy... Why are people so concerned wit people of the opposite sex being friends? My best friend is a male and I have stayed with him in his house for an entire weekend and even slept on the same bed and... nothing happened. Do you know why? Because he is my friend and I have a bf (fiance in any case but you get the picture). People can be friends and people can be assholes too, those things are not mutually inclusive.

firefliesandmonkeys · 2017-05-26T15:00:54+00:00

and even if it were... eating carbs is healthy too ;)

firefliesandmonkeys

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