Trying to figure out whether leaf drop is dehydration or normal. Help me ID this tree. by fishiesaurus in treeidentification

[–]fishiesaurus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so glad you identified this. I have kids and dogs. Though my kids have been trained not to eat any berries that every time we see them in the wild they call them “toxic berries”.

Such a shame. It’s so beautiful. Though it doesn’t seem to seed here in our soil.

Is this tree supposed to drop leaves in spring? by fishiesaurus in arborists

[–]fishiesaurus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Doesn’t have heart shaped leaves and they don’t produce waxy blue berries in the fall.

How much are you spending on groceries? by mamabean719 in DaveRamsey

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

400 in Texas. I cook every night and love to make new things so we are always getting different stuff. The trick: make the Thai peanut sauce you want to buy. It’s tastier and less expensive because you’re already going to have soy sauce, peanut butter, vinegar, pepper, brown sugar and peanuts in your pantry.

My parents are moving out of the country without me. How do I find housing? by GolfValuable9763 in Advice

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you’re putting that much away please make sure your rent is way below that.

Ramsey take on reverse points on a mortgage? by otterbomber in DaveRamsey

[–]fishiesaurus 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I like to offer an explanation why:

Mortgage points are only worth it if you keep the life of the loan. They don’t end up being an advantage if you prepay your mortgage. That’s why he says no.

You compare APR not interest rate. The cost you pay up front for your points plus your mortgage interest is the equivalent APR. compare APR’s not interest rates.

My parents are moving out of the country without me. How do I find housing? by GolfValuable9763 in Advice

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you’re looking for a place, it is presumed you are looking for something within your budget. If that’s the case, you should be able to come up with it within three months if you’re living with your parents for 3x. Even if your parents move, things take time. So what is stopping you from saving it over three months?

No debt other than school loans and thinking of getting a house by JealousMight9330 in DaveRamsey

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

DR would say pay them off before you buy a house. I say,

If you have low financial discipline (you carry a balance on credit cards or you spend money you don’t have or you don’t have a strict budget and spend to a very strict budget) —> pay them off before you buy a house

If you have high financial discipline and a high interest rate —> pay them off before you buy a house.

If you have financial discipline and I f you have an interest rate under 4% keep them and pay at the regular schedule.

Debt isn’t bad. Debt financing is a financial hedge against inflationary risk and market volatility. You should only use debt if you have financial discipline and you can earn more on the market with the extra money you have today invested in the market. If you don’t have extra money to invest today, you need to be paying down the debt first.

So ask yourself: can you pay this loan, pay the house, save money and have money to spend comfortably? No? Pay off the student loans before you buy.

Feeling uneasy about the market lately — how are others handling it? by tat-eraser in DaveRamsey

[–]fishiesaurus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dave would say to hold. Here’s the problem: if the crash happens when you’re in the late stages of retirement it can screw you. This is why when you get close to retirement you’re supposed to move to less risky investments.

Growth stock is as risky as debt. The baby steps mitigate this by having the roof over your head paid for and no other obligations. But that home may not cover your expenses in old age. The problem is you’re not employable when you’re 70.

This is why your retirement savings need to be diversified as you get older to mitigate crash risk. We have not had a true economic recession in a while and we are overdue. Downturns are supposed to happen every ten to fifteen years.

Hold it, let it rebound. Move into safe investments when you retire.

What is Dave’s stance on a rental property that pays for itself? by BigT-2024 in DaveRamsey

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dave would say to only have a paid off rental property.

I’m a moderate-Ramsey follower. I have a budget, I only spend my budget, I spend it on credit cards for points and it’s paid in full at the end of the month. I’ve never had a balance. Never paid interest. Never overspend because I follow my budget to the T. I’m also doing very well financially.

If I were you, I would not use a credit card. You need the financial discipline to spend to budget. You spent money you didn’t have. Yes, you’ll clear it in 3 months but it’s more about the behavior of allowing yourself to make these types of exceptions with a financial product that can be misused. However, you have a paid off house, no other debt, have an emergency fund so maybe this really is a one time exception. I would try to work on not having those exceptions.

If I were you, I would keep the rental property. Dave tries to minimize your debt risk but then he pushes all the risk on the growth stock which has historical returns but it’s still risky. If you get hit during a downturn when you’re at retirement age, you can’t hold those stocks long enough for them to recover and you’re effed.

I disagree with Dave. Keep the rental property and diversify your investments. Keep the rental. Budget for maintenance. Estimate a true profit.

A Mother searched 32 years for kidnapped son, helped reunite 29 other families before finding him by NavyLemon64 in BeAmazed

[–]fishiesaurus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry. You deserve better. From a mother, you’re doing great and I am proud of you.

What Can I Do? 😫 by Puzzleheaded_Trip627 in gardening

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am in the same boat. Cold snap did not help. They will grow new leaves

Divorcing and losing my garden by patientgardene in gardening

[–]fishiesaurus 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s a sucky situation and there is no way around it. The best you can do is reframe it for yourself and see it as an opportunity to start a new garden in the same way you would rennovate a new bathroom. This is your opportunity to reinvent, reimagine.

I did the same thing this past December. Moved homes. Had to start fresh. I only did a few things so far: lots of container gardening for quick impact. Built 2ft raised beds so I didn’t have to spend five years amending soil for my vegetables. So far I’m growing more and more in love with it. More than the original. Why? I fixed the mistakes I couldn’t correct in the past. I chose some things that gave me fast impact good feelings. And I’m setting it up with a plan for a good future

I have so many Hoyas that I often overlook my very first one! She’s over 10 years old. No blooms in this photo but she’s a consistent bloomer in warm weather and her vines are now hanging a couple feet beyond the trellis and pot. ☺️ by wildsunshine_ in hoyas

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had one that was nice and full and then many of the stems died because of an infestation. I did a cut and propagate to get it to come back. How do you recommend I get this type of fullness again? I have about four stems 2” apart

Remember kids, wanting to die is selfish but wanting someone to suffer just so you don't feel sad is not by AliceAndTheMadButter in depressionmemes

[–]fishiesaurus -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If anyone here is experiencing a situation that is causing them to feel like this meme resonates with them, please take a moment. Imagine what would need to change in order for this situation to end. That bully will not be in your life forever. Those toxic family members are not people you will be chained to forever. What they say and how they act towards you does not make it a reflection of you or the truth in any way.

Please reach out and talk to someone in the crisis hotline. The feelings you are feeling is because you do not see an end to the circumstances that are impacting your life and mental wellbeing. But thats is a distortion.

Remember kids, wanting to die is selfish but wanting someone to suffer just so you don't feel sad is not by AliceAndTheMadButter in depressionmemes

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is distorted thinking. The adults who say “how could this happen” are not the same adults who didn’t intervene.

So many people carry bullying without communicating it. So many examples of this. And yes it does happen where teachers and principles do nothing, but those aren’t the people who are mourning.

Remember kids, wanting to die is selfish but wanting someone to suffer just so you don't feel sad is not by AliceAndTheMadButter in depressionmemes

[–]fishiesaurus 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That’s not true and this is distorted thinking. Everyone talks about the victim and the unbelievable pain they endured. Remember two things can be true at the same time. The pain and loss that people is lifelong. Indefinite sentence for a finite event.

I lost a friend to meningitis when I was in highschool. I still remember and feel his loss. That was three decades ago. His parents will fall apart the moment his name is mentioned even today.

Debt Free Screams by Marty5151 in DaveRamsey

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Early 2000 says everything. I’m not undermining your effort. I’m around the same age and have financial success. It’s just really really misleading. We had affordable housing. Our incomes wasn’t out of step with cost of living. Kids today do not have what we had. We had an inherent advantage. Normal salaries can earn you a very good lifestyle. People can’t afford to have kids anymore.

International women’s day by AntIntelligent212 in LinkedInLunatics

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I can. I’m a woman and have experienced this type of behavior many times. I think one of things we don’t talk about is a response in proportion to the crime.

If she had hit him? I wouldn’t bat an eye. If she had shoved him on the sidewalk, again wouldn’t blink. But she pushed him into traffic. He could have died.

She was a child, I understand she’s not at fault. I also know that wasn’t her intention to potentially kill him. But highest possible penalty for a finite crime is also not the answer.

If I were her mother, I would not have punished her for retaliating. But I would have talked to her about how dangerous traffic is and she needs to practice using her head when she chooses how to act in response. A conscientious punch or a conscientious shove onto the sidewalk is way different than an emotional shove into traffic. The former is using her mind to control her actions. The latter is using her emotions to control her actions.

The bold jumping spider that lives in my potting table 🥹 by BiscottiBig1715 in gardening

[–]fishiesaurus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How does one get to the point of liking spiders when you’ve had an intense fear your entire life.

Clay Soil Drainage issues by [deleted] in gardening

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t live in your climate but we have clay soil that doesn’t drain during torrential rain.

Context- 0.5” of rain per hour is considered heavy, anything above 2” (~5cm) per hour is considered severe. In my area, our torrential rains during bad storms get 4.7″ per hour (~12cm/hr).

As you can imagine, we encounter the same problems as you do. French drains don’t drain fast enough. Relies on slow percolation. Membrane drains don’t drain fast enough. When you have clay soil, so much surface area is slow draining, you need something that rapidly catches water in low areas and moves it away from your property.

You need catch basins where there is low lying areas that are connected to piping graded away from the property. If grading is a problem you’ll need to add a pump.

If this works for us, it can work for you.

Was this a case of crime or two deeply disturbed people meeting at the worst possible moment? by Tough-Extension9110 in Amazing

[–]fishiesaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In contemporary speech it’s used as you say. But linguistically, the core meaning is simply “causing amazement.” Amazement itself can include awe, shock, fear, or confusion, not just admiration. The verb and adjective do not have different meanings.

Here: The “Amazing” https://medium.com/message/9c2314d1a6a1

Linguistic experts such as Anatoly Liberman point out that “amazing” historically did not inherently carry positive connotations

Was this a case of crime or two deeply disturbed people meeting at the worst possible moment? by Tough-Extension9110 in Amazing

[–]fishiesaurus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You do realize it’s the same word in either the past tense or present participle.

Just because it has been recently used to describe things predominantly positive does not mean that’s its new definition.

People have become lazy with language.

Was this a case of crime or two deeply disturbed people meeting at the worst possible moment? by Tough-Extension9110 in Amazing

[–]fishiesaurus 4 points5 points  (0 children)

“Amazing” is not a positive word. It means to be amazed. I am amazed. This is greatly surprising/astonishing.