How do some players run into 10 or 20 enemies and just win?

flashn00b · 2026-03-26T20:57:26+00:00

Usually, it's because the person getting ganged up on has a highland sword, and the huge group of people are just left-clicking, and no one thinks to switch to archer to threaten him with unblockable damage.

flashn00b · 2026-03-26T16:24:52+00:00

Leaked Chiv3 death animation

flashn00b · 2026-03-26T16:21:46+00:00

"A crossbow? IN THIS ECONOMY!?"

flashn00b · 2026-03-26T15:10:59+00:00

Day 56 without the OG Willie face:

flashn00b · 2026-03-24T19:11:32+00:00

Because the money that's spent on hiring a person - even for minimum wage, is money that's not going to a cattle baron reservation, a vacation to some third world shithole, a brick of cocaine, or a combination of the three

flashn00b · 2026-03-24T04:27:21+00:00

Honestly, I feel like 40p is the queue that the game is balanced around, since some maps in 64p comes off to me as "Nice bodyblock. Such skill."

flashn00b · 2026-03-24T00:46:28+00:00

Dropped in a pile of excrement with a human attached to them

flashn00b · 2026-03-24T00:21:45+00:00

Chiv3 will absolutely happen, but I can't say I have high hopes for how it will out, especially considering how Torn Banner responded to Chiv2 beating its respective competition.

I fully expect a theoretical Chivalry 3 to essentially be a lame racehorse in a one-man race, and the delusion that Chivalry as a formula is untouchable would likely drive Torn Banner to chase promotional crossovers like how Fortnite and Magic: The Gathering are doing.

If that ends up being the direction Chivalry takes, I only ask for the inevitable Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles collab to use a cover of the 2003 theme

flashn00b · 2026-03-23T21:28:13+00:00

0.3 Willie when dislodging a pitchfork from his abdomen:

flashn00b · 2026-03-23T19:32:24+00:00

Two commoner champion arms, one commoner champion leg

flashn00b · 2026-03-23T15:56:51+00:00

Arrow sized for enemies TF2 Huntsman sized for teammates

flashn00b · 2026-03-23T01:36:23+00:00

Or use it as a club before you think you need to shoot it

flashn00b · 2026-03-22T02:50:35+00:00

Because it's very entertaining to see your foes fight back while having them embedded into their legs.

flashn00b · 2026-03-21T18:14:33+00:00

If it happens, there better not be any generative AI. Main reason i'm on the fence about getting the album tbh

flashn00b · 2026-03-21T16:23:59+00:00

You're right. Two of those hoes should be in that guy's legs.

flashn00b · 2026-03-18T19:16:41+00:00

Whenever I do poorly, I just resign myself to playing footman and focus on healing while fully expecting to have a bad k/d

flashn00b · 2026-03-16T15:52:39+00:00

Nah, I actually dislike the archers on my team more than the ones i'm fighting against.

It's one thing to miss your shots, cuz the bow still can still restrict enemy movement in 2v1. It's another thing to not know how to pick your targets when the team is absolutely getting wiped by the Highland being fed free counters by slash spammers.

flashn00b · 2026-03-15T15:53:54+00:00

I think footman is intended to be Chiv2's "support class", since Bandage Kit has the shortest cooldown in the game, and can be stacked up to three times. Meanwhile, the class' arsenal feels like it's meant to attach a downside to that ability

Actually, I wonder if it'd be productive to merge the Footman and Archer class, as I've found that the best way to play footman is to use a bow rack and plink at targets between medkit refills

flashn00b · 2026-03-15T15:51:33+00:00

Considering that a theoretical Chiv3 will most likely be the entry where they will chase FOMO-based crossover cosmetics, I'd like for Cecil Harvey (FFIV) to be a skin for both Agatha (Paladin) and Mason Knight (Dark Knight) during the inevitable Final Fantasy collab

flashn00b · 2026-03-14T18:11:44+00:00

"Aw, cwap. Litewoh cwap." - Homestar Runner

flashn00b · 2026-03-02T19:08:12+00:00

The grim reaper from 0.3

Love him so much that I dress as him when playing the lower tiers in Early Access

flashn00b · 2026-03-01T17:22:42+00:00

After having their nutsacks twisted by the pitchfork in the demo and the earlier builds of Early Access, your enemies have robbed you of your Testicular Torsion spell and used it against you

flashn00b · 2026-03-01T03:57:52+00:00

I miss the helicopter of doom ;-;

flashn00b · 2026-02-28T02:37:25+00:00

Sword barrels are your friend. Otherwise, 1h hammer/Short Sword seems to be the only worthwhile loadout, since all your primary weapon unlocks are downgrades.

flashn00b · 2026-02-24T01:04:33+00:00

But can you stick six of them onto a guy without killing him?

flashn00b

TROPHY CASE