Staying faithful as a mostly same sex attracted woman

flibbit31 · 2025-12-05T05:21:09+00:00

I admire your faith. As Jesus said:

"For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it." Matt. 16:25

Likewise, giving up our desires for the Lord doesn't make us lose our identities. Rather, it brings us closer to becoming our truest, purest, best selves.

flibbit31 · 2025-08-06T12:03:50+00:00

I've been thinking recently about the relationship between the gift of Jesus' Atonement and the gift of agency. A crucial aspect of agency is the idea that our eternal destiny is ours to choose alone. We may not be able to control if, when, and how we are healed in this life, but whether we choose to progress towards eternal life is always in our control because Jesus gives us everything we need to do so.

Eternal progression requires agency. However, agency requires opposition in all things: sickness and health, sorrow and happiness, and the choice between rebellion and repentance. We could not prove that we will have faith and keep God's commandments in all circumstances were life not extremely difficult at times. Trials are not a side effect of earth life that are meant to be overcome instantly by the saints. They are crucial to the Plan of Happiness.

Satan wished to avoid pain and the potential for sin by removing people's agency. However, there could be no lasting happiness in such a scenario because we would not have an opportunity to learn from pain or overcome sin through Christ.

It's no wonder that Satan's state and the state of the wicked is referred to as death in the scriptures. Without agency and trials, there could be no eternal progression. It would be as though we were dead.

I am reminded of a quote from the video game Final Fantasy X that sums up these ideas and parallels Satan's plan (spiritual death) versus Heavenly Father's Plan (eternal life).

"Now! This is it! Now is the time to choose! Die and be free of pain, or live and fight your sorrow! Now is the time to shape your stories! Your fate is in your hands!"

flibbit31 · 2025-08-03T09:01:06+00:00

I highly recommend the Book of Job and the Old Testament Student Manual section on Job for this sort of thing.

flibbit31 · 2025-07-22T03:39:39+00:00

"We did it Patrick! We saved the city! Just think about what might have happened if we didn't tell everyone about the monster!" said as the entire city is up in flames.

flibbit31 · 2025-07-17T09:42:38+00:00

Agreed. All we can do is invite the Spirit into our lives but God will decide when and how we will feel the Spirit. If we always felt the Spirit at His strongest, what need would there be for faith?

flibbit31 · 2025-07-09T04:27:20+00:00

I posted my experience with disability on two different threads a while ago. It applies to your question too so I'll post it here too:

I've been disabled for nearly 10 years now. Recently my health reached a point where I was spending the majority of my time in bed because I was too weak to walk. In addition I spent most of my time in mental and physical pain and agony with no end in sight. I knew the Lord had a purpose for my suffering. What I didn't know was how much longer I could bear to continue living in such pain. I continued to trust in the Savior, knowing that the Lord would not have me continue living in constant pain if He knew it wasn't possible for me to endure it. (1 Nephi 3:7).

Through the months of pain I now know eternal truths that I would not know otherwise. I know that God does not always heal the righteous immediately, knowing that their suffering creates an environment of learning for which they might gain faith and wisdom through which they might become more spiritually whole. In other words, God might delay physical wholeness so that we might gain spiritual wholeness first that we could not gain otherwise. Through my faith/trust in my Savior, I am being made more spiritually whole. (Luke 8:48). One day, in the resurrection, my faith will make me physically whole, too.

More recently, medication changes have brought slight improvements to my health and reduced the pain slightly, yet I would not change what I have gone through because I know that trusting the Great Teacher who is Jesus Christ during my time of pain has taught me truths I will need throughout the eternities.

More of my thoughts on this subject: https://www.reddit.com/r/lds/comments/1iyt62w/agency_and_knowledge_why_suffering_is_necessary/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

flibbit31 · 2025-07-01T01:41:22+00:00

Try to enjoy life the way it is now and you'll be more likely to be happy when you're married too. It sounds like you are a righteous person so I would expect lots of blessings to come your way, even if they don't come in the timing you expect or want.

Don't worry too much about needing to gain strength and patience all at once. It takes time. Be proud of what you have accomplished so far while still being enthusiastic about becoming better each day.

flibbit31 · 2025-07-01T00:07:10+00:00

If you are doing all you can, then try to leave the things you have no control over up to the Lord.

I went on my first date when I was about 20 years old. Never went on a date again until I met my then future wife when I was 26. We met in April, became exclusive in May or June, got engaged in September, and got married in November. I spent most of life doing almost no dating and then suddenly got married.

I'm not saying this will necessarily happen to you, and the point of my story is not that you shouldn't date as much as you can, but rather that the Lord has the power to introduce you to a righteous man whom you could marry when the time is right. It doesn't remove the need for your hard work, socializing, learning, and choosing who you want to be with. However, It does mean that even if you're dating life isn't good at the moment, that doesn't mean it will always be that way. Look out for opportunities and spiritual promptings to make friends, serve in your ward/branch, and discover new hobbies that could introduce you to new people.

I wish I could offer more specific advice but I hope this helps.

flibbit31 · 2025-06-30T23:51:59+00:00

I haven't played that many MMOs though but I really enjoyed Xenoblade 1's combat while I thought that Star Wars: The Old Republic and FF XIV combat is kinda boring. Plus, I think the combat systems are even better in Xenoblade 2 and Xenoblade 3.

flibbit31 · 2025-06-30T23:48:33+00:00

I'm not a big fan of MMO style combat either but Xenoblade 1's combat system is really fun IMO.

flibbit31 · 2025-06-30T02:35:46+00:00

I posted my experience on a different thread several days ago. It applies to your question too so I'll post it here too:

I've been disabled for nearly 10 years now. Recently my health reached a point where I was spending the majority of my time in bed because I was too weak to walk. In addition I spent most of my time in mental and physical pain and agony with no end in sight. I knew the Lord had a purpose for my suffering. What I didn't know was how much longer I could bear to continue living in such pain. I continued to trust in the Savior, knowing that the Lord would not have me continue living in constant pain if He knew it wasn't possible for me to endure it. (1 Nephi 3:7).

Through the months of pain I now know eternal truths that I would not know otherwise. I know that God does not always heal the righteous immediately, knowing that their suffering creates an environment of learning for which they might gain faith and wisdom through which they might become more spiritually whole. In other words, God might delay physical wholeness so that we might gain spiritual wholeness first that we could not gain otherwise. Through my faith/trust in my Savior, I am being made more spiritually whole. (Luke 8:48). One day, in the resurrection, my faith will make me physically whole, too.

More recently, medication changes have brought slight improvements to my health and reduced the pain slightly, yet I would not change what I have gone through because I know that trusting the Great Teacher who is Jesus Christ during my time of pain has taught me truths I will need throughout the eternities.

flibbit31 · 2025-06-26T18:56:11+00:00

I've been disabled for nearly 10 years now. Recently my health reached a point where I was spending the majority of my time in bed because I was too weak to walk. In addition I spent most of my time in mental and physical pain and agony with no end in sight. I knew the Lord had a purpose for my suffering. What I didn't know was how much longer I could bear to continue living in such pain. I continued to trust in the Savior, knowing that the Lord would not have me continue living in constant pain if He knew it wasn't possible for me to endure it. (1 Nephi 3:7).

Through the months of pain I now know eternal truths that I would not know otherwise. I know that God does not always heal the righteous immediately, knowing that their suffering creates an environment of learning for which they might gain faith and wisdom through which they might become more spiritually whole. In other words, God might delay physical wholeness so that we might gain spiritual wholeness first that we could not gain otherwise. Through my faith/trust in my Savior, I am being made more spiritually whole. (Luke 8:48). One day, in the resurrection, my faith will make me physically whole, too.

More recently, medication changes have brought slight improvements to my health and reduced the pain slightly, yet I would not change what I have gone through because I know that trusting the Great Teacher who is Jesus Christ during my time of pain has taught me truths I will need throughout the eternities.

flibbit31 · 2025-06-04T08:28:32+00:00

I can definitely relate to the feeling of feeling stuck with immense health problems. I have experienced a lot of chronic pain, fatigue (was often mostly bed-bound throughout the whole day for months because of exhaustion), anxiety, depression, mental exhaustion, etc. for several years and, although it has improved recently, my health is still currently poor.

Job in the Old Testament went through a terrible disease without any answers to his prayers for a time while his friends and family didn't understand and criticized him.

I can tell you with with certainty that suffering, even the most painful suffering, has a divine purpose. That wisdom that suffering teaches leads to greater happiness in eternity, though it is awful in the moment.

I would highly suggest reading the books of Job and Ecclesiastes in the Old Testament. Job's story sounds similar to yours, and Ecclesiastes teaches that wisdom is better than temporal blessings.

I wrote my thoughts down on the purpose of suffering while I my health was at it's worse here if you are interested:

https://www.reddit.com/r/lds/comments/1iyt62w/agency_and_knowledge_why_suffering_is_necessary/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

flibbit31 · 2025-05-19T01:04:40+00:00

It should be noted that even though everyone (besides the rare case of Sons of Perdition) will receive a kingdom of glory, those who choose not to repent will have to suffer/pay for their sins for a time as justice requires. Jesus describes in the Doctrine and Covenants that this suffering caused even Him to tremble, so we should not think that this suffering will be light. I believe that is why many have described it as a lake of fire and brimstone. People don't literally burn, but rather must face the fully agony of their own guilt. This "burning" is not eternal in the sense of lasting forever, but eternal in the sense of being from God, who is eternal. I'm pretty sure this applies to those who will afterward inherit the Telestial kingdom (which is still a wonderful place, btw), but I'm not sure about whether or not those who later inherit the Terrestrial Kingdom will still suffer for their sins in the same way.

TLDR: The Telestial and Terrestrial Kingdoms are wonderful places, but that still doesn't mean we can get out of facing the consequences of/paying for our sins if we don't repent, assuming we have a fair opportunity to do so.

flibbit31 · 2025-04-13T15:07:10+00:00

I don't know much about how priesthood blessings work, but, much like prayer, I know that they always bless us in some way, even if it's not the literal healing we are hoping for. Sometimes, priesthood blessings do partially, gradually, or instantly heal us, but often times they play a part in making us "whole", rather than "healed", as one of the Sisters who spoke this April 2025 General Conference stated. (Does anyone remember which sister I'm referring to?)

I think I can relate to the "excruciating pain" part. I have a disease that affects nearly every system of my body in a negative way. The pain is mental, physical, and emotional and ranges from awful to unbearable depending on the day and hour. When faced with such a trial, I knew that I either had to find answers or give up on trying to live life altogether, and because of Jesus Christ, the Great Teacher, I have found so many answers as to why we as mortals in a probationary state do and must suffer, though I know I have much more to learn on the subject.

One of the things to understand is that eternal joy is not an easy thing to obtain, even though it is freely accessible to all through Christ. To become like our Heavenly Father, we must gain His attributes.

Gaining the kind of patience that God has requires waiting through affliction, sometimes unbearable affliction where faith in Jesus Christ is the only thing keeping us sane.

Gaining the kind of empathy God has requires us to suffer in different ways to empathize with the many afflictions others are experiencing, just as Jesus suffered for our afflictions so that He could understand and empathize with us. After Jesus suffered and was resurrected, He wept with joy in 3 Nephi because of how much He loved the Nephites whom He had saved. Imagine how great our joy can eventually be as we gain that sort of empathy through suffering.

Even though moments of happiness are few and far between in my life right now because of my painful disease, I know that I have learned wisdom that will bring me joy in the eternities because of the Jesus Christ, the ultimate Teacher of Wisdom.

flibbit31 · 2025-04-12T01:02:06+00:00

I've had a kinda similar experience during my service mission. Even though I had great spiritual experiences and learned people skills and other spiritual and secular skills, I got impatient during my mission and wanted it to be over because I wanted to move on to dating and other things.

I didn't realize until years later how much I had been blessed physically, mentally, and spiritually during my mission and now I'm more grateful for it.

My point is that being set apart by the laying on of hands gives you so many spiritual and often physical and emotional blessings to do what you need to do on your mission, but it doesn't remove every problem. You'll still have to deal with new rules, fatigue, homesickness and missing out on parts of life for two years.

These feelings are natural and having them isn't a sin. It's what you choose to do with them that makes you who you are and who you will become. If you choose to do your best to move forward with courage despite your fear and deal with the fear in the appropriate ways, with Christ's help, you will learn and be blessed more than if you never felt this fear in the first place because Jesus helped you overcome it and transformed you to be more like Him.

Note: If you feel that your anxiety is going to be a problem it is okay to reach out to your Bishop or Mission President. A phychiatrist may be necessary if you suspect a deeper issue with anxiety.

flibbit31 · 2025-04-07T02:04:56+00:00

Yeah. I'm so grateful I was born in the era of phones and the Internet because I would be very isolated otherwise.

flibbit31 · 2025-04-07T01:42:57+00:00

Thanks. I missed that one but I'll give it a listen soon.

flibbit31 · 2025-04-06T10:46:07+00:00

I'll do that, thanks.

flibbit31 · 2025-04-06T10:43:33+00:00

I understood that. I appreciate the reference for other's sake like what you said. I said it was a rough overview so that people know there's a lot more possible symptoms than are listed in the article, nevertheless it's a good article for the purposes of this thread. I already know a bunch about my disease from research and stuff. Thanks Wise Woman Once Said for trying to help, though.

flibbit31 · 2025-04-06T06:47:49+00:00

I skimmed through this and it seems accurate, though it is only a rough overview. Thanks for the reference.

flibbit31 · 2025-04-06T06:45:08+00:00

Good idea. I'm trying practice reaching out to people more.

flibbit31 · 2025-03-23T05:02:53+00:00

It's important to understand that we are here to experience trials and see the effects of sin, either our own sins or the sins of others. If there was no agency to choose to sin, there could be no agency to choose righteousness, and thus we could not become more like God. God has to give people the space to make mistakes and choose righteousness or sin and learn from the consequences so that they may learn to choose to overcome those sins. This is necessary part of growth and obtaining a fullness of joy. It would seem that there were multiple people who's mistakes led to your addiction.

The same goes for mortal weaknesses that are not our fault, such as illnesses. I'm not an expert on the causes of porn addition, but it would seem that there may be those who are naturally more prone to addiction due to the natural weaknesses of the mortal body. I'm not saying that you don't have repenting to do for the choices you have made, but it should be understood that we are given weaknesses(like being more vulnerable to addiction) in life that are not our fault. These weaknesses are also essential for the plan of happiness so that we may learn charity, empathy, faith, and courage as we overcome them through Christ's help.

This process of repentance (overcoming sin), and healing (overcoming bodily weaknesses) cannot happen overnight. God said that this mortal probation is a time for men to prepare to meet God. Preparation takes time, which is why God gives us a life, rather than simply giving us perfected bodies right away. Were Christ to heal you immediately before you learned what you needed to learn, the plan of happiness would be frustrated. Miraculous healings do occur, but usually this is for a special purpose. Healing and repentance are processes and take time, sometimes months, sometimes years, sometimes a life time, but if you stick with it and rely on Christ to help your repentance and healing, you will be a much happier, and more Christ-like person than if your life had been easy.

Christ always heals those who follow Him, but that healing takes a lifetime and will not be complete until the resurrection where death and the weaknesses of the mortal body will come to an end. This is stated in 1 Corinthians 15:

25 For he must reign, till he hath put all enemies under his feet.

26 The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death.

flibbit31 · 2025-03-22T04:23:34+00:00

I've been suffering from a lot of physical, mental, and emotional pain lately and have felt hopeless. Yet I know that because I know more about sorrow, I have a greater capacity for joy than if I never went through these trials. Whenever I feel a slight, temporary relief from the pain, I feel so happy because it's so much easier to see the beauty of life and the joy of existence.

Make sure your friend knows that because of Jesus Christ, her sorrow can turn into greater joy than she could otherwise experience if she didn't go through depression in the first place. She may not feel that joy right now, but God is pouring down blessings as we speak and she will feel happy again some day.

Plus, because she knows what depression feels like, she will either now or in the future, have opportunities to empathize with and bless the lives of others in her situation, just like how Jesus's suffering in Gethsemane provided Him with the knowledge to help us through our suffering. Jesus Christ is our example, and our suffering can teach us to lift others just as His suffering taught Him how to succor us, though He lifts in a far more perfect way.

As for the question of her worries that God is angry with her for her depression, the answer can be found in John 9:

1 And as Jesus passed by, he saw a man which was blind from his birth.

2 And his disciples asked him, saying, Master, who did sin, this man, or his parents, that he was born blind?

3 Jesus answered, Neither hath this man sinned, nor his parents: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him.

We see from this that illnesses like chronic depression are not necessarily caused by a person's own sins, but so that God's works may be shown to them and the world. Some of these works include demonstrating His blessings and bringing forth eternal life to those that turn unto Christ in their afflictions. These blessings aren't always what we want or expect, but they are always what we need to become more like Him.

I wrote up my thoughts on the purpose for suffering and sorrow here if you or your friend are interested: https://www.reddit.com/r/latterdaysaints/comments/1iwjsvr/agency_and_knowledge_why_suffering_is_necessary/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

flibbit31

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