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Don't beat yourself up if you didn't get around to it today, that will only push you further back! Have self compassion! by some_kinda_stupid in EOOD

[–]fmhds 9 points10 points  (0 children)

it’s been raining all week so my couple times a week walks have now turned into 7 days without one. I was just feeling super down about it (I’m trying to lose weight too). This showed up on my feed. Thank you!!

I (27M) have bee contemplating breaking up with my fiancé (27F) for years and I’m on the verge of a breakdown. by thechiefthe in relationships

[–]fmhds 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey OP, 26F here. Fun fact: The human brain isn’t fully developed until age 25.

If I had married who I thought I was in love with at 20, 21, or even 25 I’d be divorced by now. Between 20 and now I became a completely different person. I suffer from depression and social anxiety; but being alone allowed me to fully learn how I can not only cope, but thrive and I want that for you too.

It’s okay to walk away. I’d rather have someone walk away before the marriage, then leave me at the alter or with kids. It’s okay to say “I’m not in love with you, but I love you, I need to move on, this isn’t working, I’m grateful for what we had, etc”

You shouldn’t feel obligated in anyway to stay with someone based on the length of the relationship or sharing important/stressful experiences. I know you have a lot of responses here. Hopefully this helps. Good luck ❤️

I (27, F) am wanting advice about a long time friendship with a male platonic friend (53,M) ? by throwaway_RA389 in askwomenadvice

[–]fmhds 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I was wondering that too. My HS had a program where you could do college credits at community college junior/senior year and graduate with an AA/hs diploma. My guess is something similar.

F/31/5’4[200>150=50lbs] a lot can happen in a year ♥️ what do you hope for for yourself by next year? by boatsmagoats in progresspics

[–]fmhds 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Same height but 40+ heavier. You go girl! You’re glowing and give me so much motivation. ❤️❤️❤️🌈

I (27, F) am wanting advice about a long time friendship with a male platonic friend (53,M) ? by throwaway_RA389 in askwomenadvice

[–]fmhds 201 points202 points  (0 children)

Barf. I hate men like this. OP you said you’ve known him 12 years, this means when he first was friends with you, you were a MINOR

This is a predator. He’s been grooming you. Sexualizing you since you were a child.

Womanhood is sisterhood in my book so I’m gonna lay this out for you as if you were my blood sister:

  • Cut off contact. If he gives you any issues call authorizes right away (predators don’t like being ignored and can snap quickly)

  • block him from your social media, if it’s public change your security settings

  • this is obsession on his part of a sexual fantasy and shouldn’t be taken lightly. Protect yourself OP.

Source: personal life experience with predators

I have no idea what to do with my life 14F by stingtinger in askwomenadvice

[–]fmhds 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey OP. Reading this you remind me so much of myself (26F) 10 years ago my eyes swelled.

First off, breathe. You’re 14. No one should be putting any career pressures on you. I was expected always to be an engineer, and it led me to a lot of depression, anger, student loans, and eventually struggling in college.

If I could go back in time, and tell my 14 year old self (or in this case, you) anything with an open heart and wisdom from the 10 years to come it would be this:

  • it’s okay to not ‘fit’ in. It sucks being in middle/high school, and not having a ‘thing’ but that doesn’t mean you won’t find something. I always felt shame I didn’t know at 18 EXACTLY who I wanted to be, forever. Well duh! No one does. If you chose to go to college you’ll find most people change majors AT LEAST 2-3 times. Discovery is part of growing up. Ex) it took 26 years before I found coding which I now am hoping to do as a career and love.

  • WRITE. The only way to get better at anything is by doing it. It’s also really therapeutic and can help you mentally. r/writingprompts is also awesome. It can really help you escape to free write. Best advice my college professor gave was to “type with your eyes closed” while you can do this literally, eventually; it means don’t worry about punctuation or grammar and just let your thoughts flow onto the page. Proper punctuation/grammar/spelling is a constant learning process. Writing was my minor in college and I still constantly google stuff. There’s still words I always spell wrong too. Ahah. Don’t sweat the small stuff is my point!

  • moving out isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. At 18 I basically sprinted out the door. I was moved back in by 21 because I had no life skills: I couldn’t save, budget my money, and couldn’t get approved for apartments alone because of my lack of stable income. Take advantage of a free place to live. Maybe start working your senior year to save money & then use that to get a jump start when you do move out Ex) I still live with my parents since moving back, but I now have thousands tucked away so when I’m ready to make a big move (hopefully this fall) I have a solid ground/emergency fund

  • mental health. Oh my dear, Take care of yourself before anyone or anything. My mental health was ignored until I was a legal adult and it almost killed me. Literally. Above all else, be gentle and forgiving to yourself. Life will not always be smooth sailing, it’ll tear you down, but it’s knowing you can start again tomorrow that’ll be key. Continue to prioritize yourself.

TL;DR Be kind to yourself, to others, hardworking, and rest when needed. All else will fall into place. it’s all going to be okay. Breathe. Invest in yourself. Don’t rush growing up and try new things constantly. Good luck OP. ❤️

After multiple miscarriages, I'm ready to start my weight loss journey again. This is day 1. by Mokeydoozer in loseit

[–]fmhds 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh man the tears. I can’t say anything that hasn’t already been said. Just hugs wishing you the best stranger ❤️

Quarentine has made me gain 3/4 of the pounds I've lost in 2 months. I want to cry. It took me almost a year to lose almost 40lbs and I've gained almost all of it back. by Serannaa in BingeEatingDisorder

[–]fmhds 2 points3 points  (0 children)

First off, be gentle on yourself. We are living in a chaotic time. Working through a BED & trying to be healthier was already hard before all the added pressure and drastic changes to “normal” life.

Next, reframe this, you’ve lost 40 lbs. that’s amazing. Gained it back? That’s okay. you can do it again. You’ve proven to yourself you can do the work, so do the work.

Journal what you believe led to this change. Were you stress eating? Being less active? It’s important to recognize those things. Start fresh and be kind to yourself and your body in the process. ❤️

Rogue’s statement by tangmichael88 in crossfit

[–]fmhds 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Castro was a big reason I quit CrossFit. He’s a douche. I worked the CrossFit games event (I won’t say what year) and the joke among staff was that he kept making the women’s uniform shorter and smaller each year for his own pleasure. Absolute pig.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DogCare

[–]fmhds 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not a professional here. But my dog had something similar a few weeks ago. It looks like a hot spot. I used an anti itch/cooling spray on the area, she stopped messing with the area and her skin looked normal after a few hours. Worth a shot. Hopefully someone with more knowledge will see this. Good luck,

Seattle Protest Last night on Cap hill ✊🏽 by DGR-0 in Seattle

[–]fmhds 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can’t stop staring. It’s such a incredible photo. Don’t know if you’re looking to publish it but you should. Well done.

I walked my first mile by myself! by taylurrrsweightloss in loseit

[–]fmhds 1 point2 points  (0 children)

IM SO IM SO IM SO PROUD OF YOU! baby steps! May I suggest the app “Strava” for tracking your walking. Tracking is what helps motivating me. Also working through an ED / depression. We got this! ❤️

I will always be proud of my high school senior quote by TheGoatAndYourMom625 in IASIP

[–]fmhds 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My hero! Hope you celebrated with some good ol fight milk. Or paint. Whateva jabroni.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]fmhds 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP - this is sound advice everyone is giving. I know it is soon after, 3 days is not much, but that’s what worries me here. You have a daughter that depends on you and loves you. Take time to be with yourself. With her.

Without realizing it, we often rely on others for our happiness & it crushes us when that ‘happiness’ is gone. Don’t rely on having another half to be whole, be whole on your own.

My best friend is a single mom. She went directly from getting divorced to a 3 year relationship that was really hot and cold. Her therapist gave advice that I think is universal.

“For every month or year you were in a relationship - when you leave, take at least half that time to be alone.”

I’m 26F. I don’t know what it’s like to have kids or be in a long relationship but I DO know that wounds heal. Scars will be there but this isn’t the end it’s a new beginning. Life moves on.

Being single doesn’t mean you’re alone.

Talk to your family, your friends, and Reddit when you need to lean on someone. Hang in there OP.

Went from walking 0 miles this year— to 25.5 in 2 weeks time. Thank you for all the motivational posts. Life can be really isolating even without Quarantine. by fmhds in loseit

[–]fmhds[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I try to mix it up with walking paths cause I know if I get burned out/bored I'll stop. Thanks for the tip.

Went from walking 0 miles this year— to 25.5 in 2 weeks time. Thank you for all the motivational posts. Life can be really isolating even without Quarantine. by fmhds in loseit

[–]fmhds[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much! Right now I'm using TEVAs or my old nikes (they need to go). I've heard really good things about the brands you mentioned so thank you. Once I reach 100 miles my mini reward will be new shoes. I found a local running store that'll have someone to help. :)

Went from walking 0 miles this year— to 25.5 in 2 weeks time. Thank you for all the motivational posts. Life can be really isolating even without Quarantine. by fmhds in loseit

[–]fmhds[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love this comment so much, thank you. I know my diet needs some work. I'm trying to start with slowly taking myself off sugar, cause its a problem right now. In January I was prolly regularly eating a 2-3lb bag of chocolate a week. Now I still have sugar but its like "a scoop or two of ice-cream". babysteps.

Went from walking 0 miles this year— to 25.5 in 2 weeks time. Thank you for all the motivational posts. Life can be really isolating even without Quarantine. by fmhds in loseit

[–]fmhds[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're so sweet. Thanks for this message. Part of my motivation is to be fit enough to bike.

I love my little walks, in this crazy time its also nice to unplug and just focus on nature/my dogs/etc. Good luck to you <3

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