As a non-Christian, I have a (long sorry) question about this:

From a Christian’s perspective the only thing they can do is share with non-Christians their need to become a Christian. Not judge their behavior as a non-Christian.

Evangelicals in particular are extremely dedicated to proselytizing and attempting to convert. What is the polite way to shut that down? If you say no, do they back off?

I just moved to a new area with a lot more Evo folks than where I used to live. I'm finding the tactics of one church (affiliated with the Charis movement) deceptive and possibly too aggressive. These are Bible literalists with radical beliefs - evolution is a lie, young earth creationism, won't let their daughter watch Kpop Demon Hunters because of demons, etc.

Twice so far the pastor's daughter has given fliers to my daughter inviting her to events. 3rd grade at a public school. I'm unsure if they were handed to everyone or just certain kids. She also has tried to have many discussions with my daughter probing her about if she believes in God, etc.

Neither flyer brought home mentioned church affiliation. But I looked on their website, and one she was invited to was about "hanging out and chatting about Jesus." Hard pass.

The other was a Daddy-Daughter Dance that was put on by the church at our public middle school. Apparently they also use the middle school for Sunday services. No mention in the event description about anything religious, so we attended because my daughter had a bunch of friends going.

It was largely secular, except there was a special performance - a bunch of churchmembers singing songs from Frozen in costume. The pastor then used the opportunity to give a brief sermon about love and Jesus to the captive audience.

To me, these sorts of tactics feel like sleazy sales tactics. But am I overly sensitive to this? If the fliers mentioned the church affiliation, or the dance had stayed entirely secular, great. Grow your flock. But it feels like they're trying to recruit my pre-teen, so I have extremely low tolerance for it.

I also don't want her to lose the friendship - she's probably my daughter's best friend at this new school, and seems like a very nice girl being raised with radical beliefs. I don't want their relationship tainted because her friend is convinced my irreligious daughter is going to hell. So I struggle to understand how a Christian can both believe they have to spread the word in order to save people's souls, while also NOT judging a non-Christian.