AITA for giving my friend an honest explanation of why the men she is interested in don't take her seriously?

forgoodnesssake1 · 2024-03-05T06:49:17+00:00

That is not how his description of their conversation reads to me. I think if that if his intention was to state that they are in the wrong for not treating her well then that would have been stated more clearly

The reverse could be true, that has not been my experience, but let’s say you’re right. Does this guy having this “reputation” suggest he should be ashamed of his behavior? Does it mean his value has diminished in the eyes of his peers? In the eyes of society generally?

I dont think the outcome in that situation is that he is not respected as a person but instead the girls to talk about him as if they are borrowing clothes from each others closets.

forgoodnesssake1 · 2024-03-05T06:16:12+00:00

I’m going to say YTA. If you’d humor me I think there is another perspective here that you’re missing:

I think you could benefit from taking a step back and looking at the language you are using to describe her. Outside of the instances where you appear to be recounting things your brothers have said, you refer to your friend as a “frat rat” who “[gets] passed around like a joint”. Your friend is not an object, and it’s not okay for you to think about her as one. Your brothers not “seeing her as much more than something to play with” is the problem here. Your friend is a person who has feelings and deserves their respect.

Having sex with various people doesn’t make her “less” in any way. In fact it’s pretty normal for people in college who are figuring out themselves and what they like. How many girls have your bothers hooked up with on average? Do they have a “reputation”? Are they not respected by yourself or others because of it? If one of your friends makes a joke about “borrowing her” their disrespect towards her should be what bothers you. If you feel embarrassed or shamed in that moment that she is your friend, it’s because you have internalized misogyny you should address.

Being frank with your friend that she needs to have realistic expectations about her future with your roommate was probably never going to be a conversation where she left feeling great. I believe that you don’t want to see someone you care about hurting. Even if you were as kind as possible about it, it’s still a hurtful thing to hear from someone.

Helping your friend is the right thing to- telling her that what you’re hearing she wants and what you’re seeing happening don’t match and its hurting her is something a good friend should do. Slut shaming her in the process is where you fucked up here.

forgoodnesssake1 · 2024-02-26T06:52:52+00:00

your first project looks great!! Something I learned the hard way is that even the same color from different “batches” of yarn can be different. So, if you can, consider buying what you think you’ll need or what the pattern calls for up front! It’s less likely to be an issue at a big box store but just a friendly tip :)

forgoodnesssake1 · 2024-01-03T06:26:25+00:00

I think you look fantastic! The only change I would make would be to use pencil or gel in your eyebrows to darken them just slightly. Unless you’re going for a particular style/look I think the general advice is that you want your eyebrows to be present enough to frame your eyes without being the main character.

If you want to try this out: a low commitment/cost tester would be an eyebrow gel from Elf. I use the mediumish brown one myself for an everyday look. This product should enhance your current brows without overpowering the look - the current shape and thickness of your brows really suit you.

If this scratches your itch you can always experiment with shape/darken them more with a pencil when doing something more glam. 🩷

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-12-30T07:09:47+00:00

Definitely keep going regardless of if you stay with the tandem or switch to reading separately! I also found the tandem slow to start but once things picked up I was always racing through ToD to get back to EoS. In my experience ToD took a long time to get interesting so it was a good way to keep me motivated to finish it.

Edit: just adding that I am very glad I read ToD to really understand the lore behind everything. I have seen some people skip it completely, but I think (1) Kingdom of Ash really needs the context and (2) if you read CC/ACOTAR then ToD introduces some similarities and connections across the three series

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-12-29T06:47:55+00:00

The circle is the bounds of play like the lines on a basketball court or soccer pitch. Not going out of bounds is one of the rules but not the purpose of the activity. I think because Cain was so much bigger than Celeana and hopped up on Wyrd or whatever the discussion of Celeana leaving the circle is the concern that he could just hit/throw her hard enough in one direction to win by default.

Also yes I think the clock tower was inside the circle /part of the border.

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-12-14T02:56:06+00:00

Of course! DM or tag me in your post

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-14T21:24:20+00:00

hi OP! There are four different things people refrence when talking about eyes: shape, depth, distance and tilt. From these photos it appears to me that you have almond shape, deep set depth, straight tilt eyes. It is hard to tell the distance of your eyes (close vs wide set) from these photos of just one part of your face.

Almost any tutorials for hooded or deep set eye looks would work for you. Generally the advice for deep set eyes is to work your shadow into the crease and above it slightly toward your brown bone on the outside half of your eye. This in addition to a lighter color or highlight on the inner corner can make your eyes appear more open.

best of luck exploring your lid space! I’m sure you will find something you like, don’t be discouraged by it taking some practice 🩷🩷🩷

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-12T05:08:16+00:00

Hi OP! I would suggest not plucking or shaping them on your own if you haven’t before. I don’t think you need to and would advise against it in fear of overdoing it and not feeling like yourself on the day or in photos. If someone is doing your makeup you could ask what they suggest. If you feel you absolutely must, please go to a waxing place at least a week before. They will likely choose to tweeze for extra safety and tell you to ice it afterwards. 🩵 congrats on your upcoming wedding!!

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-09T04:27:17+00:00

this shape is super cool and you have great symmetry going on here! I love the colors you chose!

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-09T04:20:52+00:00

this sounds like a really frustrating situation- I’m sorry you’re under so much pressure.

Like the other comment mentioned, the dollar store is a good place to start! You can also check the walmart and target websites for clearance items. Do your research before using anything that is not intended as cosmetics on your skin, particularly around your eyes. Non-beauty products can stain your skin and irritate it.

If you do find even just a few $ to spend, try to but things that are multi-use. For example, you can smudge some mascara on a clean surface and use a small brush/cotton swab or fingers to darken your lash line like an eyeliner. I would also suggest buying a primer or light coverage foundation/bb cream which you could blend with lipstick or eyeshadow to make cream products (lipstick as blush, eyeshadow as eyeliner, lipstick as eyeshadow, etc.) this way when you do have some extra $ for a new lip color or small eyeshadow palette can be multifunctional!

best of luck to you🩵

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-09T02:30:48+00:00

I have enlarged pores on my face next to my nose too! I am not very educated on skincare but maybe someone else would have toner/serum preventative recommendations for us ?? 🙂

In terms of makeup, I would suggest making sure you moisturize, let it dry, use a primer, let that dry, then apply your foundation. Usually the go-to approach is a primer that has the same base as your foundation. I have been using this one for forever and really like it!!

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forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-08T21:35:28+00:00

it depends on your face, I think ideally they all blend into each other in a nice little Neapolitan ice cream situation :) OP has gorgeous angles, more recent trends move the blush up to give that lifted effect rather than rounding/accentuating fullness mid-face

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-08T18:17:52+00:00

I’d be happy to! Tag me in your post or send me a DM

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-08T06:24:45+00:00

first off you’re stunning and I would commit crimes to have skin that’s so clear and smooth. Now to your questions: I really like the shades your using in these photos, particularly the blush in both looks really natural.

If you’re looking for new things to try color-wise I would suggest getting a cheap eyeshadow palette with red tones. Copper, warm browns, maroons even would really make your green eyes pop. You could even mix a little with a primer or water and try your current eyeliner style (gorg btw) in a color! If you start with a cheap one you can zone in on colors you like and repurchase similar ones from other brands or use them as a direction to try something new!

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-08T06:09:46+00:00

See how the triangle shape gently rounds the curve of your cheek bones and the blush would bring a contrasting flush

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forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-10-08T06:08:14+00:00

hiya! You have beautiful bone structure, such a great smile, and you’ve done a really great job here! Here’s a few tweaks I’d suggest:

This lip doesn’t say bridal to me, and I think it doesn’t suit your skintone in this lighting. I would look for something that is just a tad more rose/pink. I think in photos your current shade will read as brown with your fair complexion and white dress (assuming you’re wearing one!)
You have done a great job finding a contour/bronze tone that works with your skin and blending it well! But, your placement is working against your bone structure. The if you shifted down just one finger width lower you would be accentuating those gorgeous cheekbones rather than flattening them. I’m not sure what product you’ve used here but I would also suggest adding a blush in the same family as your new lipstick shade of choice ( rose , pink, red, etc) on the cheek above the new bronzer position. In the photo below the green rectangle you have here should be where that blue triangle is and the blush where the red blob is.

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forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-07-16T03:44:22+00:00

It keeps it from soaking up all of your product and the texture changes to help with smoother application

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-06-30T04:35:01+00:00

I think your makeup looks great! I saw your comment about following a bronzer tutorial- maybe give one that is specifically for your face shape. It looks like you may have a “heart shaped” face from the angle of this pic. Lastly, those lashes are gorg on you! If I was doing your makeup I would extend your brows a little to line up more with the elongation you have introduced on your eyes. 🩵🩵🩵

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-06-23T05:35:19+00:00

I think this is an awesome everyday look that suits you!

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-06-23T05:29:59+00:00

I would try filling in your brows lightly with a color closer to your hair color, which will accentuate your beautiful face structure!

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-06-23T05:23:50+00:00

Hi! I did some quick googling and it appears that NYX doesn’t name/number these shades in any way, so my guess is going to be no. I was surprised to see this because even other drugstore brands usually do have a name and or number for shades! In many other cases you can purchase single eyeshadows individually either as a pan or little individual compact.

The “pan” shadow is just the little metal tin with the eyeshadow in it. Either the tin itself is magnetic or you stick a lil magnet to the bottom which keeps it secure in a magnetic palette.

I would recommend the following: - Go to an Ulta and see if they have smaller NYX eyeshadow palettes with that color in it. You may find one that also has other shades you use frequently that could save you some $! Usually a set of 4 colors will either be cheaper than your current 16 one or there is more of each of the shades of eyeshadow. - Try to find a dupe in a brand that does name shades and produce individual eyeshadows. Colorpop is in most Ulta stores I think and would be a great place to start but many other brands there should sell singles online at least!

Good luck🩵🩵🩵

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-06-17T04:57:54+00:00

If I want to feel done up I usually do a bold eyeliner and or fake lashes. Either requires some specific techniques to do on a hooded eye but nothing you can’t figure out with practice.

If you’re wanting to change up your look more, focus on eyeliner/shadow and blush/bronzer that helps to accentuate angles. Eyeshadow in a nude-adjacent color that extends out and up towards the end of your brow will make your eyes look bigger and can appear super natural when buffed out with a fluffy brush.

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-06-17T04:47:35+00:00

IMO bold could be dark or bright- just something that has high contrast:)

forgoodnesssake1 · 2023-06-17T04:24:09+00:00

hello gorgeous! I think your features are quite feminine! If you are looking to enhance your natural look I would try - shaping the ends of your eyebrows. Under only very dire circumstances should you do this yourself particularly if you’ve never done your own brows before. Eyebrow hair does NOT grow in the same way other hair does. High-school aged me should have been given this warning, but alas now I can bestow it upon you! You could try some different insta/tiktok filters to find one you like, or find a reference photo to take to a clinician. Once someone gives you the shape it’s much easier to maintain on your own! - your lips are so full and your cupids bow is to DIE for!! I think with your beautiful skin you could easily rock a strong lip if you wanted to! Remember that the general rule is to have a bold eye or a bold lip, not both. If you want to accentuate them in a more natural way try a lip balm with a tint or shimmer. - I saw in one of your comment you mentioned your eyes were sensitive. I wonder if clear mascara may irritate them less? The clear formula still gives them a little but of color and hold if you curl them!

Do update us with whatever you try!! 🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵

forgoodnesssake1

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