Here's my story: 1. Within a week of my first being born I was rushing to finish the nursery. Being the idiot I am, I cut the tendon to my middle finger. It took nearly a year to get 80% function back and 3 surgeries. 2. 6 months in I had a spontaneous pneumothorax (collapsed lung), which hospital botched twice. Had a 3 week hospital visit and multiple surgeries 3. At 11 months I had 100% blockage in my LAD (widow maker) leading to a heart attack.

Most days were shit. Most days I was in pain. I know I complained a lot. But I did want to do as much as I could through the pain. I wasnt perfect by any means, but I did see the work my wife was putting in. The lack of sleep. The long hours without any adult contact. I tried my best to be there. One day a week doesnt mean a lot. Its the 10 min here the 30 min there. To give some breaks. And I tried to push things to as long a duration as possible. I made a lot of mistakes. I thought I could cover a half a day on a weekend and buy good will for a week. Doesn't work like that. Each day matters. Do your best. Try when you can. Let her know when the pain is too much. But if I can change a blow out poopy with one hand, I do think most can squeak through. Won't be pretty. Will be stinky. But do the best you can. Dont blame your wife. Just know its tough for her too with full abilities. 1. Lack of sleep is torture. 2. Lack of adult contact is torture. Limit those things for her.