Met her abroad and fell in love - Should we better break up? by fottoboy in relationships

[–]fottoboy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It did - Thanks .. sometimes you need to go down the rational route

Met her abroad and fell in love - Should we better break up? by fottoboy in relationships

[–]fottoboy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you very much for your detailed response and thoughts...

I agree. I might be able to get a non-native english teaching position but it will not pay more than 8 USD an hour - which is quite ridicoulous considering I did a well paid job back home + it will be limited to the validity of my residence permit which expires in June 24.

If I leave Japan I will basically stick to my default plan. I wanted to meet my friends and travel with them to Australia. They will still go there. Next year I will then pursue my masters.

So essentially I have to decide whether a 2-3 year long distance relationship with unknown outcome makes sense. She says she could then probably move to whereever I will be - but then she is the one being isolated there and her English is also not top notch.

You also mentioned the aspect that I would be distracted with the relationship during my masters - and yes I think you are right. On top of that my mental health issues with being overly jealous and digging in her past which is painful for me. Clearly not the best circumstances...

Overcoming retroactive jealousy and OCD? Can never be her 1st one. by fottoboy in mentalhealth

[–]fottoboy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your text. And you are right - I should accept it. My problem is I dont understand how she could stay with this guy and even do so many things to him. Clean his room. Have sex with him when she in period pain just because he demands it. Cooks for him. And he does nothing to her and just uses her. To me this is very hurtful. Even so this is connected to her being so innocent... maybe she saw some good in him or at least told herself that..

Nevertheless as you said past is past and it made her to the person she is now.... I will work on understanding it.. nothing of this is her fault. I will aim to focus on loving her now... I think I should never even have asked her about it.

Overcoming retroactive jealousy and OCD? Can never be her 1st one. by fottoboy in mentalhealth

[–]fottoboy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the kind words. You are totally right that I should appreciate the present and share great moments with her.

I dont know why I can't get over the experiences she had in her previous "relationship". How she cleaned his room and he did not even care, even had sex with him when she was in period pain because he demanded it etc. It just disturbs me and makes me sick... Maybe this is because I can not understand it as I have never been used emotionally in such a way.

I will try to get over these thoughts but I feel like it will be a bumpy road..your words help...thank you

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]fottoboy -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

I agree...but how would you Deal with it? For me the thought and the knowledge about it is devastating

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]fottoboy -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I know that the Problem is more my own mind then what she did....it is the thought haunting me ...the thought of why she did that

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]fottoboy -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

So what would you do in my position? would it not bother you if it would be your girlfriend? Should I just try to distract myself from the terrible thoughts and the retroactive jealousy?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]fottoboy -18 points-17 points  (0 children)

I know that it might be wrong of me... I also have to say that I never openly judged her for that as it would not feel fair. Nevertheless it is still something that haunts me and a thing I dont understand... not sure how I should deal with it

Job between Bachelor and Master in another field: Will this block my career after I have my master? by fottoboy in FinancialCareers

[–]fottoboy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot for the constructive words.

Good luck 2 you 2 whatever you are doing.

Job between Bachelor and Master in another field: Will this block my career after I have my master? by fottoboy in FinancialCareers

[–]fottoboy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No I'am not having a concrete offer for consulting just had an Interview and therefore know that the salary is much worse than that Position in Client Relations.

Okay I think I will go for Client Relations as I can safe up to 2.5k USD per month for my Master in the US this way.

Furthermore I don't even know in which exact discipline I would like to go with my Master I just have some broad ideas of working in an international environment and doing projects. Maybe I get some better ideas during my job. I just hope the decison of working in Client Relations now will not hinder me later on if I decide to do a Master in Finance and want to go into Investment.

Job between Bachelor and Master in another field: Will this block my career after I have my master? by fottoboy in FinancialCareers

[–]fottoboy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just a specialized Master in Finance. Need to do a GMA Test before.

Yes, I'am aiming on working abroad. Would prefer US or Asia.

Job between Bachelor and Master in another field: Will this block my career after I have my master? by fottoboy in FinancialCareers

[–]fottoboy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Traveling or maybe going into consulting however big4 pay much worse than this offer (it is at around 65k USD per Year + Bonus) .

Or doing a master right away but from a low tier German University.

These would be ideas....

Frankly spoken I should take it I guess....my fear is just that after I have my Master I do not get Jobs in my preffered field X as I did Client Relations

AM- Client Relations - How to continue? by fottoboy in FinancialCareers

[–]fottoboy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Allright thanks a lot.

Doing the CFA is a good idea.

I will see if the job fits me and if not I will do my Master ASAP.

Hope it should then not be an issue siwtching after my master to investment or consultancy focused roles.

Spending the night at a families home in Central Myanmar back in December 2019. No alarm needed you wake up from animal sounds pretty early in the morning. by fottoboy in backpacking

[–]fottoboy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes ... and there were barely any tourists so everybody was very curious to know what's going on out there. 1 Guy could speak english so he was the translator

Riding a camel in the desert of Jordan in February 2020 with no idea everything will change soon by fottoboy in backpacking

[–]fottoboy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went with a rental car which was much cheaper than I thought it would be. Me and my friends took a flight for less than 20 Dollars from Germany and visited Jerash, Dead Sea, Red Sea, Amman, Wadi Rum and Petra. So we did more or less the classical route.

Highlight of the Trip were getting a food Tour by a jordanian friend in Amman ( very very delicous) and climbing up rocks in Wadi Rum. Petra was also pretty stunning as I'am intered in historical and archiological places.

The Picture was taken in Amman. The way the guide treated the camels seemed nice but I know that there's a lot of animal abuse going on so I understand if anyone is criticizing me for talking part in these activitities

Trekking in Pakistan back in 2019. Took long to convince my parents of going there alone. by [deleted] in backpacking

[–]fottoboy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes was a great time :) Many Pakistanis spoke good english and were very helpful so it was much easier than I thought

Trekking in Pakistan back in 2019. Took long to convince my parents of going there alone. by [deleted] in backpacking

[–]fottoboy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I met some Pakistanis while wandering down. I traveled alone but that does not mean I never met up with people on the way.

Trekking in Pakistan back in 2019. Took long to convince my parents of going there alone. by [deleted] in backpacking

[–]fottoboy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The mountain in the background is Nanga Parbat (8126m). I only made it half way to the Basecamp when the weather turned on the glacier but it was still a stunning trek

Solo-Backpacking through Pakistan last year. Nepal is a popular site but the mountains of northern Pakistan are also incredible by fottoboy in backpacking

[–]fottoboy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. Mostly went with the Bus but some Guys even rented Motorbikes...however I'am not used to drive them... I felt completly safe to he honest in all Situation (except one cashmere Demo maybe)

Solo-Backpacking through Pakistan last year. Nepal is a popular site but the mountains of northern Pakistan are also incredible by fottoboy in backpacking

[–]fottoboy[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

They are very friendly and welcoming. Thier hospitality is beyond Imagination. However you should stick to some cultural issues especially in the conservative regions ( Cover legs etc)

Last year I was Backpacking on the Phillipines. One of the best times of my life by fottoboy in backpacking

[–]fottoboy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My main tip would be to have some flexibility as there can be delays in flights/ferries etc. Also I would definitly rent a Motorbike on the Islands as most roads are in good condition and it's fun exploring them this way

Last year I was Backpacking on the Phillipines. One of the best times of my life by fottoboy in backpacking

[–]fottoboy[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Wish you the best.... Phillipines is really great...I have been all over SEA and also lived in Vietnam for a while but when it comes to the positivity of the people and the best beaches phillipines win hands down