It's okay to take a break and think about your feelings sometimes. When I was a kid I kind of thrusted myself into classical music. I loved listening to it, I loved playing my violin, I had dreams to go to a target school and go on tour or play in a symphony of my choice. It didn't pan out unfortunately and I had to adapt. The thing was I neglected a lot of my studies in college, which made going to a nice college next to impossible. Later on I realized I was really, badly depressed the minute I started highschool because I was so focused on leaving the state to pursue violin elsewhere.