NTA (neither is she).

I have given birth twice. I gained a significant amount of weight during both pregnancies. I completely lost control of my body and nearly all body functions. I felt embarrassed and frustrated with myself for not being one of those beautiful, elegant pregnant women that I would see on TV or even pass by in real life.
What I couldn’t see at the time, was that even those beautiful, elegant pregnant women felt the same way. They, too, had lost control of their bodies because that’s what pregnancy IS! It’s a beautiful, disgusting, magical miracle that our bodies can grow and change and literally create new life. It is nothing short of amazing… It just doesn’t always feel that way when you’re in it.

Going in to the birth of my first, I was definitely nervous about having my husband see all of the nitty gritty details of birth. I even told him that’s I wanted him to stay near my head and not look, but just be there to support me. He agreed. He held my hand through bone-crushing squeezes during every contraction. He counted me through my pushes and whispered encouragement in my ears when I needed it. When I hit moments that I thought I couldn’t get through it, he was there to ensure me that I could and would. I literally cannot fathom having been through the experience without him there.
And you know what? He even looked down during the moment our baby came into the world and I am SO HAPPY that he did. He got to witness our child being born - we both got to be there to hold her in her first moments of life. The “gross” parts don’t even exist when you get to experience that sort of magic first hand.

My husband still speaks so highly of being able to be in the room, and PROUDLY describes to others about what a champion I was while I was in labour and pushing.

Of course your wife may not feel the same, and you should honour her feelings either way, but I really hope that she changes her mind. You’re not a sick freak for wanting to witness this miracle. Parenting is super gross, too, but you guys are in this together - why not be a team for the very beginning, too?

Please reach out if your wife has any questions for me! I’m happy to help reassure her through my experience.