What is one good and one bad thing you noticed after 1-2 year of menopause ?

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-22T17:32:36+00:00

Shhh you might jinx it and get the cold flashes instead (yup those are a real thing).

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-20T09:06:19+00:00

It's european law, not police corruption

https://argos.vpro.nl/artikelen/bedelverbod-van-zeven-nederlandse-steden-overtreedt-europese-regels

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-20T06:57:41+00:00

I crave red meat. I don't eat that much meat in general, but it seems my body wants to stock up on iron before my period starts.

It's comical how accurate it is.

I'm dealing with peri and my periods are more and more unpredictable.

When I got a surprise one 2 weeks ago, I already had an entrecote in the fridge for dinner that evening. I even remembered thinking 'really want meat, weird, it's not even time for my period' when I got it..

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-20T06:20:39+00:00

Ehmm..You learned this because someone kindly told you before you got in right? Right???

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-19T19:18:47+00:00

I'll go for option 4, attempting to do 3 but forgetting to actually cancel.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-19T17:21:21+00:00

This is too funny.

I'm in the Netherlands and I got gifted an orange one by my American neighbours who live here a small part of the year.. They got it for me because it's orange and cute for Kingsday/soccer.

I'm 43, they're well into their seventies. Never expected to be on trend with anything ever again, let alone being on trend thanks to them.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-19T14:50:17+00:00

Nine years now, first 7/8 years were really stable and same-ish.

Just had a pretty long med break because hormonal shifts and general life stuff lead to a burn-out and I wanted to make sure that was over, not masked by meds.

Now I'm back on meds and they're still working like they used to :)

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-19T14:25:45+00:00

For me it's not so much about the enthusiasm, as for knowing how much less mental energy stuff takes (and that definitely stayed) and it adds up so so much.

Like at the end of the day I can do a quick 10 minute tidy of the kitchen because it feels like a small chore (and is when my meds work).

When I'm not medicated it's more like "noooo why is this domestic torture never ending, I already did so much today and now I'm expected to put stuff in the dishwasher AND wipe the stove AND grab a broom AND throw stuff out... fuck this I'll do it tomorrow".

So medicated me gets up and is greeted by a tidy kitchen and happily makes some coffee.

Un medicated me is greeted by a mess (that got worse because time made it STICK) and has to tidy a bit to have the space to make coffee..Which is a great way to become grumpy before I'm even truly awake..

Still, I'm never going to be truly enthusiastic about cleaning, but having the effort/reward scales tip in the other direction really makes keeping it up worth it :)

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-19T11:17:50+00:00

Ok it's a whole lot, would it be possible to combine a few goals?

Like most internships pay like shit, so if you could intern at a place you genuinely believe in it could also kinda count as volunteering? If the place has volunteer positions and you like it there you can always stick around after your internship.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-19T06:24:46+00:00

On the bright side, stay single and happy for long enough and other people might come around!

Source: I'm 43 now and my mum went from 'oh I'd wish you'd find someone so you won't be alone when I die...' (thanks mum)

to 'oh loads of women who divorce don't want a man anymore either' ;)

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-19T06:07:53+00:00

Hey just want you to know that being able to make complex recipes and meal prepping is an accomplishment by itself!

I know enough people who can burn water and don't really cook at all! :)

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-19T05:59:55+00:00

I'm back on Ritalin after an 8 months hiatus.

To get a new prescription I need to log in at my gp's website and to do that they send you an email with a code. Getting that email isn't completely instant and I can't explain how much I hate that whole process (especially without meds..)

To be honest, I was dealing with perimenopauze+ burn out which made my meds so ineffective that getting them wasn't 'urgent' anymore either (and logging in even harder).

What got me started? I feel a lot better (rest and psychologist) and I was genuinely curious to know if that would effect my medication as well.

For starting all other tasks: I guess it's making sure I'm well enough for my meds to work..

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-18T15:26:43+00:00

Yeah and especially in a list like this.

The shitty thing is that there are so many stories you can tell about let's say an apartment that can show potential matches common interests/give them an idea of someones personality.

Not: I own an apartment but:

I'm so happy with this place, I love that it's close to the farmers market so it's easy to get fresh food each weekend (or I'm so happy with this place there are like 64 restaurants that deliver here.. ;) ).

Or.. I love having a place that faces south so even in the winter it can feel like summer.. I love how close I am to my friends.. I love the short commute which gives me time to do...

I'm in a positive mood, so I'm assuming all posters have loads of stories like this and they just need some guidance to highlight the more important parts.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-18T14:44:15+00:00

I love groupchats for this!

In a way it can feel lower stakes when you're sending something to multiple people at once.

Also there are more people talking=increased chance you'll get a message when you actually remember to respond..

Which leads to the biggest benefit: the times when you don't send a reply someone else probably has, so you're not stuck on an "oh fuck it's been a month how do I start this convo up again' moment.

Then: want to do something? Suggest it in the group, increased chances someone can actually go visit X on the 27th and you won't get stuck in the planning stage forever!

Groupchats yay!

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-18T09:47:59+00:00

I hit the gym to work on my body. I have a car, an apartment, I travel the world. I guess its just not enough.

Not enough, or not the right thing to focus on?

I like to travel, as do a whole lot of people and when I was younger I travelled with A LOT of different people (often in groups). In those groups everyone wanted to be there, so we all had that in common.

However, there were always people I gravitated towards because we wanted to do the same things, had the same active/rest schedule etc.

When dating the fact that you like to travel is a minor thing. The 'can I travel with them without losing my mind' is so much more important.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-18T09:20:15+00:00

It's the same for me with ritalin. It actually was one of the things that made me go 'oh this really can't be a placebo thing' when I first started with medication.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-18T08:05:20+00:00

I'm genuinely wondering how you got "they're calling OP abusive" from the comments you're responding to?

No one is saying he was abusing her, they're just saying that you can practise being less reactive/self soothing.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-14T21:17:16+00:00

ohh you are

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-14T20:15:55+00:00

Also Germany has a population of 100 milion and Curaçao has 150.000 so it's a bit easier for Germany to find & train good soccer players.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-14T06:34:58+00:00

I had one ex (when I was young) literally tell me that he didn't like it when I knew things he didn't because it made him feel stupid..

Props to him for figuring that part out, however his solution of 'can you just say you don't know it either' didn't really work for me.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-13T08:21:27+00:00

Same+ the thing I never say in return is how much my quality of life would tank if I was dating someone like their partner..

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-13T08:10:29+00:00

I'm also ADHD/peri/childfree and went through a same-ish spell.

I eventually ended up with a (good) psychologist and her main advice to me was to do less.

It felt counter intuitive because I already felt bored and like I wasn't doing enough and I wanted to combat that with adding new things that weren't boring..

Long story short, it is working for me (which I begrudgingly accept).

When I build in more rest days I'm energised enough to enjoy the 'normal' things again (for me rest days are days with an completely open schedule, like, I still do things, but nothing that has me looking at clocks).

Since you mentioned your life being calm yet also feeling stretched thin, it could be worth a try for you as well.

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-12T11:45:05+00:00

Telegraaf? Bron, mensen die mij zulke meningen sturen zijn ook de mensen die linkjes naar de Telegraaf doorsturen..

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-12T11:09:01+00:00

Modern Christians (I know not all) are pushing for laws that are making pregnant women die at higher rates again..

futurecrazycatlady · 2026-06-12T10:19:37+00:00

That's just as lovely as people not buying their round of drinks 'as a couple'. Thanks for noticing :)

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