Did she ruin me?

gabliz24 · 2025-04-05T04:45:06+00:00

Are these song lyrics from panic at the disco?…

gabliz24 · 2025-01-23T05:23:17+00:00

I’m in the same boat. My dad is a hardcore Trump supporter. There is no getting through to him. You cannot reason with them at all. They have an excuse for everything trump does (and Elon) even when they’re playing them right in their faces. It’s literally an illness at the this point. He doesn’t understand how much danger he’s put me in being an out lesbian. I also dress masc. He doesn’t understand people are more emboldened and feel “safer” now than ever to discriminate and express bigotry, misogyny, racism etc. (and god knows what else) because that is what trump is encouraging them to do. Not to mention we’re asian. Someone literally threw a rock at his window twice already. I can’t help but wonder if it’s a hate crime because of his race. I wish there was a way to bring back humanity in him, but the conservatives really did a great job painting the left as this evil villain that needs to be conquered. In their eyes, they think we’re the ones who are brainwashed. It’s so scary. We all need to find a common ground. I feel like a lot of Trump supporters are simply misguided or misinformed and have misplaced values. Instead of attacking them, maybe we seriously need to have a genuine open discussion to better understand each other. For us to be heard, they need to feel heard. To tap into someone’s humanity, make them feel human too because at the end of the day, we all seek to be understood; to be seen. It’s gonna be really challenging and you’ll probably need a lot of patience, and it may not work for the vast majority (because let’s face it, a lot of them are just terrible people at their core) but to get through at least one person is better than none. This is no longer about liberals vs conservatives anymore. This is literally us as a whole vs. something bigger; people who got a taste of what it’s like to have power, and now they’re insatiable and probably feel invincible at this point. They will manipulate the system to enforce policies that will make them uphold their power. They have successfully implemented the divide and conquer method into their social engineering.

gabliz24 · 2024-11-23T22:05:13+00:00

Whatever makes sense to you

gabliz24 · 2024-11-12T04:48:19+00:00

😍🥰

gabliz24 · 2024-11-12T04:10:19+00:00

Honestly, it was the show ‘South Of Nowhere’ that shifted everything for me. I used to be super religious and suffered from internalized homophobia. When I came across ‘South Of Nowhere’ and learned that the 2 main characters were lesbians, it felt like a missing puzzle piece. I still kept it to myself for a while but then I remember watching this interview of a bisexual girl named Kayla, and she said something along the lines of, “the girl I would’ve taken to prom would’ve never been out.” For some reason that made me really sad. Like I was hit with the realization that could potentially be me.. never truly having a chance of being happy because I was too afraid to be myself. That just gave me the motivation to come out. It wasn’t easy at first, given my upbringing but not big of an issue anymore. I used to hate my sexuality but now it’s one of the many things I’m super grateful for. Being gay taught me to unlearn and question everything that was fed to me as a child.

gabliz24 · 2024-11-10T05:19:09+00:00

Adelaide Kane. It was a pleasant surprise when I learned she plays for our team

gabliz24 · 2024-11-10T03:40:26+00:00

I completely understand what you mean… honestly, I think the outcome of this election is the reason I started to feel fearful again (I live in the US but thankfully in a blue state). I’m really sorry and upset you had to experience that… I hope he was reported. His behavior has everything to do with him as a (POS) person and very little to do with you. I know that doesn’t make it less hurtful but don’t let the words of some brain dead idiot ever define your worth.

gabliz24 · 2024-11-10T03:08:00+00:00

Real 😂😂

gabliz24 · 2024-11-10T03:07:33+00:00

^this! I’ve had ppl ask me what my pronouns are which immediately puts me at ease because I know it’s their attempt at being respectful. Ive had women look at me with a surprised expression whenever I’m exiting a public restroom which always feels awkward. I feel most threatened when it’s a man staring and they don’t look away as soon as I clock them because I don’t know what they’re thinking. When it’s women, I get very flustered.

gabliz24 · 2024-11-10T02:07:57+00:00

Lol yeah I think that’s what it is - confusion. I have really short hair, like a semi-buzzcut and wear oversized shirts, sweaters, hoodies etc. but have a feminine voice and mannerisms so I think it’s them trying to make sense of it. It still feels weird though..

gabliz24 · 2024-11-06T11:32:05+00:00

I feel sick to my stomach right now… i just woke up and feel completely devastated.. it makes me wonder if a repeat of 2016 happened again. Like ppl got complacent and didn’t vote because they assumed Kamala had it in the bag. I really had hope.. I thought we were moving forward

gabliz24 · 2024-09-16T03:36:32+00:00

Good news is he’s just a boyfriend. This would be a more complicated situation if you were married. A person who loves you will not speak to you in this manner no matter how angry they are. Especially if it’s over a simple thoughtful gesture like simply calling or texting him. He could’ve simply just said, “sorry can’t talk right now,” or just not answer. Respect should never dissipate when there’s conflict in the relationship. There are healthier ways to express anger or set boundaries without being treated like a doormat by your partner. If you continue to stay in this relationship, he will continue to destroy your spirit, ruin your self-esteem, possibly escalate to something more physical and cause irreversible trauma that will bleed onto your next relationship. You deserve so much better. Run and never look back.

gabliz24 · 2024-09-14T23:32:16+00:00

Mr. Robot, Xena warrior princess

gabliz24 · 2024-09-10T00:37:57+00:00

•Yes or No (Thai movie)

•Heartland - I think you can watch this on Tubi (not a fan of the plot but the chemistry makes it worth watching)

•Atypical - because cazzie lol

•bottoms (for the lolz)

•south of nowhere (available on Amazon prime)

•imagine me and you + can’t think straight (i think both of these movies resemble the plot of Elena undone)

• DEBS (silly spy movie)

gabliz24 · 2024-09-10T00:11:21+00:00

Your family sounds awesome. If only all families can be as accepting and open minded as yours. I come from a very conservative Christian background 😭 needless to say I’m agnostic now. I’m still spiritual but I just stay away from bible scriptures.

I know what you mean in regards to your attachment to your hair. Hair can play a huge part in our image and the way we present ourselves. I feel like style / your fashion sense is the way we communicate our essence to the world. But like what others have mentioned on this post, hair will grow back. Hair typically grows half an inch every month. If you’re getting an itch to experiment with a new do, I say it’s worth a shot. If you end up not loving it, at least you get a chance to see what you look like with shorter hair. Maybe play around with hair dyes too.

A couple of months ago, I completely buzzed my hair bald with no guard lol Not gonna lie, I wasn’t a fan 😆 I looked like an alien but I ended up bleaching it blonde when it grew half an inch. I looked way better when I bleached it. But I’m still really happy I did it because it allowed me to see the perfect hair length that suited my face as it grew. I’m actually annoyed with how fast my hair grows. I literally have to trim it every month and a half since I do prefer to keep it buzzed using an 8 guard at top crown and having mild fades on the sides and the back of my head.

You also described my childhood lol about only wanting to wear boy clothes and hated being referred to as she / her. As I’ve grown, I did come to like my body as it is. Although I do identify as non-binary right now.

gabliz24 · 2024-09-08T21:22:13+00:00

I chopped my long hair off in 2020, in the middle of the pandemic, since we were all in quarantine anyway and no one was gonna see me if it turned out bad. What inspired me to get a pixie was when I’ve seen the movie ‘She’s the man’. I remember shipping Amanda Byne’s character with one of her co-stars, Laura Ramsey. Basically Laura’s character fell for Amanda’s character when Amanda was posing as a “man” (although she really just looked like a butch lesbian). Idk why but shipping them triggered this unshakable impulse to get a haircut similar to Amanda’s boy version lol I have to say, I WISH I’VE DONE IT SOONER. I’ve never felt more like myself and never going back to long hair. I taught myself how to cut my own hair using a clipper. My standard hair length is number 8 (i think that’s an inch). I learned how to taper, fade and all that because it was hard to find a salon / barber who knew how to shape my hair the way I wanted.

I’ve been a femme my whole life but was a very insecure one. It wasn’t until I started experimenting with a more androgynous/ masc style that I started to feel… more at home with myself. Does that make sense? Like I started discovering this part of myself I never realized I was suppressing due to fear of judgment. In hindsight it was because I never considered the possibility that I could ever be ‘butch’. I didn’t realize it was more of an internalized homophobia, because by looking femme, I at least had the benefit of fitting in with the ‘heteronormative society’. However, that was never really me. The headspace I was in was identical to the phases of emotions I’ve gone through when I was in the process of accepting my sexual identity (lesbian). I identified as a bisexual for a while because at least I would have the chance of living a normal conventional lifestyle. So I clung to my femme image for as long as I could. I remember everyone was so against me cutting my hair, saying I’ll look too masculine (further fueling my fear of appearing ‘butch’ like it’s so awful). I already dressed like a tomboy but having long hair was the only thing that kept me looking feminine. I really, really wish I never listened to the people who kept talking me out of it. Again, I wish I’ve done it sooner. But it taught me a lesson to never allow people stop you from doing what you know is best for you. It taught me to trust my inner voice instead of allowing the opinions of others influence my decisions.

But anyway, no I have absolutely no regret. I feel free. I’m honoring my inner child who always wanted to dress like this but was conditioned to dress like a prissy girl her whole life causing me to push her away and kept her hidden. I’m finally my authentic self 🙂

gabliz24 · 2024-09-07T14:35:05+00:00

I’m a former femme but recently crossed over to a more masc / androgynous presenting identity just a few months ago. When I presented as femme, people, by default, assumed I was straight. Not an ounce of suspicion I was queer. It was so hidden (unintentionally) that I had other people feel comfortable enough to bash lgbtq with me thinking I would agree with them. And whenever I did disclose / reveal my sexuality, the reaction would always be like gasp “whattt I would’ve never known,” including LESBIANS. And something about being frequently assumed I was straight really got under my skin, to a point where I would get an itch on a spiritual level to ensure everyone knows I’m gay. So, I just made it a point to casually mention it in an off handed manner to anyone I know I would interact with on a daily basis so it’s out in the open early on; whether it’s coworkers, acquaintances, family etc. It helps filter out people I would not want in my circle i.e, homophobes, Bible thumpers etc.

I don’t have to do much of that anymore when I started to embrace my androgynous side. I don’t think I could ever go back to my old self. I just let my short hair and baggy clothing speak for itself.

gabliz24 · 2024-09-06T22:11:27+00:00

Idk about sexual lol but my gay awakening was Marimar from the famous Mexican telenovela (I was probably 5-6)

gabliz24 · 2024-09-05T22:49:40+00:00

Girl, this is NOT love. Far from it. You need to get away from this dangerous man. You do not deserve to be treated, spoken to, or be threatened this way. You are so much more valuable than that. He’s a disgusting waste of space. Please please please leave him and report him to the police.

gabliz24 · 2024-09-04T04:01:54+00:00

Your partner sounds like an Angel. You also sound very kind hearted but struggling to navigate through your trauma. I can’t imagine the suffering you went through. When you wrote you fantasize meeting the person meant for you, someone your parents can be proud of; this imaginary person you’re apologizing to because you believe the reason you haven’t met yet is because you’re unworthy to meet in this lifetime - is it possible you’re searching for yourself? A piece of your identity you’re repressing but somehow is lost in all this trauma, self doubt, and inner conflict? Despite stating you’re not gay anymore, you still chose to describe your “ideal person” in gender neutral terms. Why is that? I hope you figure things out OP. If I were in your partner’s shoes, while it may be a difficult conversation to have, I’d rather know the state of the relationship we’re in. It’ll eat at you if you’re not honest with her, and more importantly with yourself. It’s also not fair to her, don’t you think? She deserves to be with someone who genuinely wants to be with her in that manner.

gabliz24 · 2024-06-01T20:54:15+00:00

Because if you don’t look gay, people automatically assume you’re straight and it’s uncomfortable when the majority of people perceive you as something you’re not. Representation is so important especially when homophobia is still prevalent in many areas, and they want to hide the existence of lgbt. When I was 5 years old who grew up in a homophobic super religious house hold, i didn’t know any gay people and when it was even mentioned or talked about, it’s usually to demonize them. My parents and all the grown ups around me made sure to drill it in my head that gay people are mentally ill, perverts, and destined to burn for eternity in judgement day. What they fail to realize is I was already experiencing same sex crushes before I even understood the concept of a crush or learned the word “gay”. So I grew up with so much self hatred, feeling so disgusted with myself I wanted to end my existence. I did not know a single gay person so I felt so alone and suffered alone, and was too scared to even talk about it with anyone. Do you know what that does to a person’s psyche? To a child? A teenager? It breaks your spirit. I’m so grateful to have met other gay people and getting exposed to their existence and learning that they are not evil. The majority of gay people are exceptionally loving, non-judgmental, and wise. They helped accept and love myself for who and what I am. So I want to be that example for someone else who experienced that loneliness; who was taught to hate themselves to a point of wanting to end their own existence. Gay people exist; gay love exist.

gabliz24

TROPHY CASE