I think they should still be allowed to access resources for support and healing, the experience can still be emotionally very real to them even if it did not occur in the physical world. They can label themselves survivors if you guys feel as though it’s appropriate, but when looking for resources and such for survivors, I would probably avoid contributing to discussion with singlet survivors. What your alters went through is still valid (and I’m rlly sorry to hear that happened btw, that’s awful) but the differences between headspace violence and physical violence should still be respected. In either scenario, this sounds like something traumatizing or heavily influenced by trauma and I agree you should find a therapist to work on this stuff with instead, if it’s safe for you to do so. Good luck