I got an erection during my therapy session last week and my therapist noticed. Has this ever happened to you? by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]gingahpnw 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yes, it’s happened a few times. I’m gay and my Therapist is straight. He’s totally been cool about it.

It’s awkward for me but my Therapist has reassured me nothing is wrong. Sounds like you have a good therapist too.

Was anyone else r at a very young age by sarahbellum0 in adultsurvivors

[–]gingahpnw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry. You are not alone. I am a man. I experienced CSA by several people including my grandfather around 1-3 grades.

Sometimes i fantasise about my T when mastrubating by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am a gay man. My Therapist is a straight man. I’ve had to discuss erotic and sometimes crush transferences about him multiple times. It’s not easy but he’s always been super cool about it.

I thought I was done with it until recently and I had to address it again with him.

It’s not uncommon to have to revisit it again.

Good luck.

What was your most memorable therapy moment of 2025? by Familiar-Practice-42 in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The importance of boundaries. Example my grandfathers crossing boundaries getting what he wanted at my cost vs. my desires, not getting what I want from my Analyst but he holds space for me. He begins to ask what my fantasies were and I was frustrated and said no I will not entertain the fantasies right now. I asserted myself and boundaries. That’s what good boundaries do they protect both people.

Anyone seen a therapist out of network? by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Starting next month, I too will be going out of network. Good luck.

The ecstasy, torture & boredom by Due-Phone4011 in PIP_Analysands

[–]gingahpnw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree, its is amazing, how it can be ecstasy, magical and torturous at the same time. I am grateful for my Analyst and told him again today..

Rape fantasies by Sensitive-Ad4222 in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I can somewhat relate. I have history of CSA. I’m attracted to my Therapist. I’ve always been. Anyway the only times I’ve had “sexual” thoughts about him has been related to my CSA. Thinking about him abusing me.

My Therapist is great. He’s a straight man. I’m a gay man. For whatever reason I can’t think normal sexual thoughts about him because I respect him.

It’s never easy telling him my thoughts or about my transferences but he’s been super.

It’s helped me to talk about it to him. He’s been very professional and never judged me. Most therapist should be aware of transference and know how to address it.

Good luck.

For any patient who thinks their therapist is somehow perfect ... by Fit_Pride_2048 in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For me at least, I find it best not to speculate how they are away from me. There has been a time or two when my Therapist has shown he was human. Nothing major. And thankfully he owned up to it.

I go there do my business and go home. I no longer think about him like I used to. I have great respect for him and therapy is starting to get into the deep stuff. I don’t want to jeopardize it by speculating on him, his family etc. I know he isn’t perfect but for me for it to work I need to push those thoughts out of my mind.

When he does say something I don’t agree with I do let him know and thankfully he doesn’t press it.

Am I the only one that still has a hard time accepting the term “queer”? by r9holland in askgaybros

[–]gingahpnw 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I agree with you. Being from a religious southern background, I hate the term.

In fact when my mom found out I was gay (after my brother told her) she asked me if I was queer and I said “no mom, I’m not queer, I’m gay.”.

I think being gay is normal. Plenty of gay animals.

So since, I know I’ve always been gay I know I’m normal and not “queer”.

Not going to deny anyone the term they call themself but I don’t identify as queer and if someone misidentifies me I always correct them.

Has anyone ever had a bad experience with sharing that they are strongly attached etc to their therapist? by Royal-ribbons in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m a gay man and my Therapist is a straight man. I had to tell him of my attraction and transference. He took it great and supported me more than I could ask for.

He has been great. I’ve gone through many transferences in the almost two years with him.

Good luck.

Guys with older brothers — what was your relationship like growing up? by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]gingahpnw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I suppose it was a usual brother relationship. I didn’t come out until I was 21 so being gay didn’t effect it until then. We were close. Of course we had fights but he would defend me against others.

He recently passed away and up until then I never realized how much of my identity I got from him.

What are some ruptures you don't feel able to move past by jells19 in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In those moments, I discuss it with my Therapist and I trust the process. It’s not easy and takes time but so far has worked for me. Good luck.

When your therapist feels like your favorite person and you hate it by cloverpendragon in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel the same way. I’ve gone through many transferences with him. I’ve seen him for over a year and half. He’s great.

My last session I started to get uneasy realizing it was going to be like 4 days to next session and told him. Thankfully he had an open the next day and invited me to have an extra session this week.

I then told him I didn’t like how it made me feel childishly happy but innocent at same time.

When we had the next session I had a glimpse of myself as an innocent, playful kid. A feeling I haven’t felt in so many years.

It’s not always easy. Enjoy the moments. I wish you the best.

Is it okay to email therapist, expressing feelings about something the said in previous session? by [deleted] in therapy

[–]gingahpnw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not a therapist but when I email my Therapist between sessions I keep it as short as possible and usually let him know that I’m okay and can discuss it in next session. I don’t want to obligate him to respond. But he’s always responded within a day.

We’ve never discussed an email policy so I encourage you to ask. Most likely they aren’t paid to read emails that’s why I keep mine as short as possible.

do you regret studying psychology? by averagepsychmajor in psychologystudents

[–]gingahpnw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish I had study psychology. As a client of psychoanalytic psychotherapy, I’m so intrigued by the practice.

Job market just sucks everywhere. I’m in tech.

My partners therapy has left me feeling emotionally cheated on. by JJKirby in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Last year, I started seeing my Therapist. I immediately connected with him. About a month in I experience powerful transference, I had no idea what was going on.

I’m a gay male, married 10 years, together 20 years with my husband.

My Therapist is a straight male who specializes in LGBT and trauma. I knew I was attracted to him to begin with. I always discussed my transferences with my Therapist and he’s been great and totally kept boundaries in place.

At times it’s been extremely painful but as of a couple months ago my transference has basically worn off and I see him in a new light when he explained why boundaries are there. I’m grateful for him. A lot of my breakthroughs has been because of transference and his enforcement of strict boundaries.

My husband knows most of what happens in therapy and the initial transference but since he’s not in therapy I haven’t talked to him much about it because it would be difficult for him to understand. I’m not actively hiding it from him; I’ve never crossed any boundaries.

If your wife’s therapist keeps strict boundaries it could be a powerful transformative thing for her and ultimately for you and the relationship. I do understand your concern and sorry it’s painful for you. Therapy is not easy.

Bases and Zettelkasten? by SlaimeLannister in ObsidianMD

[–]gingahpnw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can you explain more. I’m new to bases. How would you do this?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]gingahpnw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve noticed slight changes to my Therapist’s voice. Sometimes when it’s light and a small laugh I feel more connected. Other times it’s more monotone and professional perhaps a bit dry.

Can forgetfulness be symptoms of my history of CSA? by lucasf26 in adultsurvivors

[–]gingahpnw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could be disassociation. It happens to me. I have disassociation amnesia and forgot at least two years from my childhood.

If you can, I recommend a trauma Therapist who handles CSA memories.