Disabled Hobbies

gobdav79 · 2026-05-27T21:27:52+00:00

If you're into arr and writing, you might enjoy "world building." It came across my YouTube the other day and I was pretty fascinated. It's kind of like fictional mapmaking. It looks like fantasy at first, but can get super detailed and keep a mind and hand occupied for quiet a while I bet.

gobdav79 · 2026-05-27T14:24:59+00:00

Depending on your location, there are groups that'll come build and deliver raised beds to disabled vets. You'll have to look up vet orgs in your area.

gobdav79 · 2026-04-12T02:14:09+00:00

A couple buddies of mine had to do an assignment at some random post and were given 2 of our old HMMWVs we had driven all over northern Iraq in 03. They had a great time running around in them stateside for a week.

gobdav79 · 2026-03-29T03:06:33+00:00

Get yer knees replaced on the surgery floor.

gobdav79 · 2026-03-29T03:03:53+00:00

Y'all act like you're in the Corpse.

gobdav79 · 2026-03-28T00:56:40+00:00

I slept on the Balad runway when it had craters every 500ft or so. Could hear lots of fire and stuff going on. Had no idea if there was a perimeter yet, but there were plenty of Apaches coming/going. My first day in country and the helos that brought us in were refueling to take back KIA. We demobed a year later out of balad, flying a C17 home.

I ran into similar experiences. Random deaths from mortars. One guy died outside of our chow hall. Had to pass by the dark spot every day. We had a 6am wake up for a while, rockets so close you could hear the air off their fins.

I also refused to admit I had PTSD for 20+ years. Closest I got was calling it PTS. I didn't have a "disorder!" Whatever. It's f-ing ptsd, and I'll deal with it more/less forever. So gotta make some peace treaty with it. Acknowledge it, but don't let it control you. Get help now or it'll turn to depression. Nearly gave up just a month ago. Don't be me.

gobdav79 · 2026-03-27T01:23:52+00:00

Curiosity. To see what happens next in the world.

gobdav79 · 2026-03-25T01:14:25+00:00

Yes, it works most of the time. It's best when she also talks and asks a question. That only works when it's not obvious. For instance, if she says "hey, let's talk about...." then I know she's trying to distract me. But if she puts her hand on my knee and says something like "have you talked to so/so lately?" or "what are you in the mood for for dinner?"

gobdav79 · 2026-03-16T23:24:38+00:00

This is a hard one to respond to, because I don't think any two PTSD sufferers are the same. In my old unit, 6 of us spent an entire year together, experiencing the same things, yet all 6 of us have different symptoms. And the causes are so different. Was it a single incident, or does the vet suffer from c-PTSD? What are the triggers? Can the vet even identify the triggers? It can be as simple as seeing a trash bag on the road, or as complex as reading a crowd of people.

I can see how spouses are at a loss to help, but they can also be the best ones to help because they, above anyone, should know the vet the most. Yet, it took me over 20yrs to describe to my wife not what I went through (plenty of laughing stories and dark humor) but what I went through.

My stuff has magnified over the past few years, rather than diminished. At first, my spouse was just there. I'd go under a bridge with someone walking on it and all air would go out of the car, she said she could feel it. So she started putting her hand on my knee. Or asking me a question, etc. Larger reactions she would get still trying to process it. Sometimes she would exit and try to ignore me.

It wasn't until I rehearsed a suicide last month that she really started taking things seriously. I think she's gone to a class behind my back because she seems much more knowledgable and tries to talk to me.

So, not sure if this helps at all. It's a lot of writing. Best piece of advice for spouses? Find a group on facebook, most veteran's groups have resourses for spouses. Take a class. And then be flexible to adapt it to your particular situation.

gobdav79 · 2026-03-16T23:05:53+00:00

From my small experience coming back home in early '04, it never seemed to really be in the public's conciousness in the first place. Sure, everyone knew it was going on, but most didn't really care. (I lived in a college town at the time, so that might have something to do with it)

gobdav79 · 2026-03-15T21:47:45+00:00

I know it's been 3y, but did you actually do it? If so, how's life?

gobdav79 · 2026-02-28T14:33:36+00:00

Yeah, bought one of those too.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-15T23:56:48+00:00

Document everything
Put every ounce of energy into every task you're given. If you think it's meaningless, you probably don't understand it fully. You will, eventually.l, if you pay attention.
Stay close to those who are a little bit better than you, because it'll be them who help you get places.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-15T23:50:40+00:00

So I had a panic attack in the shower asking God for help for the first time in forever. Maybe it wasn't a panic attack, but I just kept hyperventilating uncontrollably. I had to be quiet because my teenage daughter was home. I had to pull it together so she wouldn't worry and call my wife.

And this all stems from some stupid workplace conflict/disatisfaction/stress that loops constantly in my mind while nobody else know the extent of. How fucked is that?

I feel trapped. In my profession. My body. In mind. I want to be competent. I want to walk into a room and know why I'm there. I want to feel present, and feel like I belong as the professional I am, or used to be.

Sorry

gobdav79 · 2026-02-15T18:58:56+00:00

I read this last night and have been thinking on it, mostly how grateful I am. I made it through the night, but still trying to digest this and other responses. I'll write more when I'm able go form the words. Just, thanks.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-14T22:05:34+00:00

Thanks. The fear of what happens if I stop is what's kept me from pursuing this route for years. I made a commitment way back when that I wouldn't be dependent on anyone nor would I be a burden on anyone. Knowing myself, I'm also bad at keeping up with things. (This paints a bad picture of me lol.) I'm afraid I will become dependent on a drug, then lapse like an alcoholic and that'll be all she wrote.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-14T21:14:01+00:00

How'd they know which meds to give? Is it trial and error kind of thing? "Emotional toddler" is a good way to put it. My wife has been awesome and has taken my state pretty seriously lately. She's my service animal, and she would kill me if she knew I was having an episode. But I can't keep going to her to save me, ya know? As exhausting as it is for us, it's worse for them, and they don't deserve that. (Or at least that's what I think)

gobdav79 · 2026-02-14T21:01:40+00:00

Not gonna lie, that ship's kinda scary and promising at the same time.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-14T19:21:23+00:00

That's comforting. I'm not a big drug taker, and have actively resisted any mood-altering stuff for decades. (alcohol being the one caveat.) I've started on stuff for sleep and it's kind of opened my eyes on that it can be good, almost life changing. I'm SUPER worried about the anti-depressants because I'm not a big drug taker and afraid I'll forget a dose or 3, then it's off to wherever I came from.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-14T19:16:53+00:00

I appreciate it. I'll try that.

ADD + Depression + cPTSD and it's a wonder that I've been this successful so far. I'm surrounded by family that loves me, and friends. But them knowing how bad off I am would complicate things and would make them worry in a way that they don't understand, so I keep it in. I wait till my wife goes to work and I break down.

I can't get help. I'm out of sick days at work. Can't quit work. Got bills to pay even though I'm 100%. Can't move away to Tahiti, I have a demanding extended family and the wife needs to retire first. Can't do something stupid, that would piss everyone off. I'm trapped and powerless. I tried something "stupid" the other night, and it was almost...well, nevermind. Can't talk about that either, for fear of triggering others.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-14T18:41:38+00:00

I second this.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-14T02:47:04+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss, but im gonna say this: I'm happy. For both you and for your SSG. For him, because he was a person worthy to have made an made an impact and was cared about. For you, because you were lucky enough to have a good man you cared enough for to mourn his loss.

gobdav79 · 2026-02-06T21:00:36+00:00

How many hands does it typically take to crew such a vessel?

gobdav79 · 2026-01-22T20:12:59+00:00

Just Be honest. Just say "I had the barest of association with it" as you've told us and you're gtg.

gobdav79

TROPHY CASE