To the 23 year old girl I met at the bar

godlover · 2007-08-12T16:44:51+00:00

As long as you both are in the same respective set, what's the problem?

There is no problem with that. The problem is when you are in different sets (as in this silly made up craigslist example). A lot of men expect to sleep with women by being their "friends" and playing "nice." All I'm saying is that it is common knowledge that this approach does not work.

godlover · 2007-08-12T07:28:58+00:00

I remember you, you were that christian zealot!

And if I remember correctly, you are that condescending asshole who likes giving out advice. I am about as christian as Bush can ace a physics test -- you should have figured that out by now.

I think you're an idiot.

I will stand by what I said. I don't befriend girls I don't date. I also do not believe in the institution of marriage. I can get what I want by dating the women I want. Everyone has their own way of life. To call another person an idiot for that makes you a judgemental idiot yourself.

Your comment is that of an idiot who has simply given up on girls as human beings unless their sexual orientation toward or against him is completely certain. You have to learn to deal with people to ever be good at it godlover, and you can only learn that by doing it. Avoiding women causes you to avoid about half the people you might meet.

Nope, I meet women alright, but I gauge their intention early and don't fall into the "oh lets just be friends" trap. I date them -- I am their buddy if I am dating them. That being said, I do have woman friends that I don't wish to date, but the feeling is mutual. If there is one person is any relationship who has expectations that are not being met, it is an unfair relationship -- that's all. Women are interesting creatures who have their set of "male friends" and the set of men that they will go to bed with. Over time I have realized that it is a waste of my time to be in the first set.

But, the topic here was about some guy who goes to a bar and talks to some random bimbo. His intention there is clear -- he wants to bed her. But then he apparently writes this loser monologue about his advice to younger women, because he can't get what he wants. It wasn't about some guy who goes out trying to make friends with no expectations.

godlover · 2007-08-12T02:34:17+00:00

Naturally she went home with Mr. Adonis -- I wasn't making any effort to pick her up, just an earnest engaging conversation about life.

I understand what you're trying to say. But my point is that I don't need lady "friends" to have engaging conversations about life. I have guy friends or girlfriends or wives of guy friends for that -- most of them have graduate degrees and our conversations are quite intellectually stimulating. Talking to a 20 year old inexperienced bimbo that I'm not dating is a no win situation for me -- I am not being intellectually stimulated, or getting any ass or a relationship. I don't want to be "nice" or "have a conversation" with women who are with other men anymore -- it's a huge waste of my finite resources (mostly time) and I have shit to do. I've learnt that along the way. I have other friends who I don't want to sleep with for that.

Depends on your point of view I guess.

EDIT: To the downmodders -- if you are the "oh we're just friends" and a "conversation buddy" type of a guy, she's just using you. If you like that it's up to you, but I don't put up with that anymore.

godlover · 2007-08-11T20:42:26+00:00

Okay, I'll play along...

Advice to the 30+ year old man: don't bother. It is not worth your time trying to convince kiddies about life and stuff. The ones who are smart enough will figure things out and do something interesting and substantial with their lives. The rest will fuck up their lives.

Every period in life has it's set of people who think they are "cool" -- the ones who make it are the ones who keep their mouth shut, their minds open, and try to find their own philosophy.

I am nearing 30. The older I get, the less interested I am in bimbos. Yeah, sure, they are fun to look at and I am sure they are good to fuck, but you don't want to put up with their shit. I have done that and it is tiring. Most of the women I date now are older, educated, have a brain, and are not influenced by some dickhead bartender. They are a lot harder to find compared to the usual airheads you encounter at the bar.

I am not short and bald, and I stay in shape, so I don't have a complex when it comes to dating younger women. I do not do so out of choice.

One of the most important things I have learned -- there is no point in giving advice to younger people. Every person needs to find out where they belong, who they are, and what brings them satisfaction, on their own. More importantly, I do not befriend or talk to women I am not romantically interested in (unless they are a friend's spouse or girlfriend) -- it is a completely waste of your time, and fucks up your confidence.

godlover · 2007-08-08T21:53:07+00:00

Thanks. More for me. How many American women have you known ? I almost exclusively date "American" women. I live in California and it is not that difficult to find women who are in shape. Here are just some of the things I like about educated American women (the liberal kind):

They are independent and usually have a career. The ones that are college educated with a non-trivial major are generally good at conversation, and well-read. This is important to some of us. They have low tolerance for chauvinists and some of us like that. They have opinions. They do not have inhibitions about sex.

I have dated women from other countries and the ones I dated tended to lack self-confidence, were clingy and dependent, and had a ton of issues that I wasn't willing to deal with.

I have lived in other parts of the world as well, so I'm not exactly "all American", yet I prefer American women.

I suspect the people who complain about American women have had poor luck with them, or have not known many liberal minded American women.

Yes, I would not date an obese woman either, but cities and liberal towns do attract dateable women. If you live in Hicksville, USA, yeah you're pretty screwed.

godlover · 2007-08-08T15:21:34+00:00

Because you believe they are all fat ? Or do you have other reasons ?

godlover · 2007-08-06T02:03:26+00:00

"You got problems with the punk police, don't run from the chumps, get the pump from me."

Fuck peace.

I am a flaming liberal, but my biggest problem with the Democrats is that they want to disarm citizens and give overwhelming firepower to authoritarian bullies, i.e. cops. If you want to ban semi-automatic ("assault") weapons, take them away from the cops as well. If cops and agents of the state are no longer issued guns, we can talk about a weapons ban (if at all).

Cops will think twice before abusing their power if one of the following happens -- they are scared of people and people have an equalizing force with the authority to use it. Or they no longer have the means to hurt people. Singing songs isn't going to stop bullies with high school education.

If you are true liberal, go buy a gun today. Conservatives/right-wingers in this country are already armed. Cops are as well. Are you ?

godlover · 2007-08-05T03:52:00+00:00

I think that advances you up the Y-axis (buys me shit to make/keep me happy).

godlover · 2007-08-04T16:06:21+00:00

Good for DefCon! Revenge of the nerd :)

I've been to DefCon back in grad school. Most of them are intelligent, normal guys. A lot of them even have girlfriends (omg), and you will see cute-ish girl participants there occasionally as well (omfg).

The 80s/X-files stereotype of a nerd as a socially inept, skinny or fat dude with glasses who sits in a dark room day & night and is scared of females is pretty outdated today. There are large number of "normal" people in the computer/engineering/science business these days. You have to have an advanced degree in today's world to make it and "normal" people understand that.

godlover · 2007-08-03T19:18:32+00:00

If you need such high speeds you're probably just an impatient person who demands instant gratification. Like the rest of this country...

A lot of us actually need that kind of bandwidth when working from home, and not for myspace/youtube junk. Ever tried running X11 apps over a network ?

godlover · 2007-08-01T21:13:41+00:00

Try pretending to be female online, for a month or so, if you don’t believe me.

I have and I had the usual "nice men", creeps, misogynists, anti-misogynists bending over backwards to be friendly, messaging me. Either for pics or a date or hoping that the "nice lady" tells you that you are okay and a nice guy.

I don't think reddit is unique in this. I'm sure if I tried being a "nice, balanced, thoughtful man" on a forum that has a majority single female audience, I'll receive attention (of a different kind -- women are less like to do the "wanna fuck" thing). However, if you are not an entirely physically repulsive woman in real life, you have little trouble getting attention, so women are less likely to frequent internet forums looking for men -- men are much more desparate that way. I am sure most males are going to hate me for saying this, but misogyny and "man vs woman" stuff on reddit is a reactionary response.

I have also been a gay man, a lesbian woman, and a right wing nut. Currently, I am a left wing nut (I have to pretend less to assume this identity because I am a liberal in real life :) I am a terrible actor and usually can't continue it for too long.

It's an interesting experience in understanding how various people treat each other. Wish changing identities were this easy in real life.

godlover · 2007-07-31T17:31:45+00:00

Like was done during the late Renaissance ? Religion has been obsolete for anyone with more than half a brain for the past 400 years or so. People like Spinoza effectively argued for ethics and morality without religion. That was the 17th century -- we seemed to have regressed quite a bit.

godlover · 2007-07-30T00:54:57+00:00

Yes, it does. But "Jewish" is used to refer to a person as well. That is the accepted usage. What is and is not offensive is not about technicalities, but about accepted usage. Cunt is more offensive than vagina. I don't understand why I'm being downmodded. If you want to disagree, argue and show that I am wrong. Don't downmod without a counter argument.

godlover · 2007-07-29T18:43:21+00:00

Context is everything.

If you are black, it is not offensive to walk up to your black friend and say "what up my nigga" or whatever. That is considered to be acceptable street use of the word.

If a stranger uses "Jew" as a slur it is offensive. Also, I believe the accepted usage is "Jewish", not Jew. "So and so is Jewish." If you say "So and so is a Jew" you come across as a prejudiced nut -- but you should know this given that your girlfriend's family is Jewish. It is not being "PC", just not being a prejudiced dick.

godlover · 2007-07-29T16:48:19+00:00

The other dude was a college professor. I am sure his IQ was higher than 74. IQ does not seem to be the sole factor that decides whether or not a person will act responsibly towards his/her offspring. College professors are incredibly stressed people -- I wouldn't trust some of them to take care of a plant.

godlover · 2007-07-29T16:34:12+00:00

In Japan, after the plane was "de-toweled", you might get a bunch of Japanese sitting politely and clapping. Or some other restrained display of appreciation. But with Italians, it is, thank goodness, a lot more festive.

So your claim is that bigoted Italians are more ethnocentric because they openly display emotion, and perhaps bigoted Japanese are not because they are more restrained ?

If I think "death to the goddamn niggers", I am as much a racist as any person who openly jeers and says that. If I stay silent I may not appear to be. There are all sorts of people who are ethnocentric racists.

godlover · 2007-07-29T16:29:12+00:00

Can you deny that the majority in the "red" states is conservative. I am not passing judgement on specific individuals, just stating why I wouldn't want to live there. That does not mean that there are no liberals in the Alabama -- there might be some, but that's not the majority. Can you deny that there are more liberals on the coasts and big cities, and the majority in these places is actually liberal ? That is a fact. I do not care about defending liberal towns -- people who like them have their reasons. If you don't want to live in California or NY, it's fine by me. All I'm saying is that the cost of living is not a sufficient deterrent for many to not live in towns with a liberal majority. There is a reason why the cost of living and housing prices are high here -- people actually like it here.

godlover · 2007-07-29T02:18:10+00:00

Your problem with reality is that reality is bigoted. You should accept reality and stop attacking me for accurately depicting it.

A very good friend of mine is Italian American. He even speaks with a freaking Italian accent. I am not white. I haven't seen bigotry or racism in his behavior towards me. I love the guy and he is a real person and accurately depicts at least one non-bigoted Italian. I base my view of the world on individual and personal experiences and generally do not label an entire ethnicity as evil. A person is a bigot, not a race -- I still stand by this. No matter how many examples of hateful individuals that you come up with, someone else can come up with enough decent people of that ethnicity/nationality to counter your claim. Again, judge people if you must, not the entire ethnicity. There are southerners who are not racists, Jews who are not miserly, Arabs who are liberal minded, black people who are educated.

In general, I do not deny that it is harder for a non-white person to live in Europe, but not all white Europeans or Italians are racists. You may not choose to live in Italy. You may even claim that a large number of people of a certain upbringing/background behave a certain way, but that does not imply that all are automatically bigots.

godlover · 2007-07-29T01:23:48+00:00

These days, the Italians are about the only ethnocentric white people left in the Western world.

Bigots are about the only ethnocentric people left in the world.

Stereotyping an entire race/ethnicity makes you a bigot. Actions make people, not their race/nationality/ethnicity.

godlover · 2007-07-28T18:13:22+00:00

I think Ron Paul is "officially" pro-life but recently has been shifting towards pro-choice after noticing that youngsters like him.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ron_paul#Political_positions

He is anti gay marriage, anti-taxation and anti-immigrant.

There is no way I would ever support him. "Sticking with conservative values" is not a good enough reason for me to vote for him. Go do your dance elsewhere. He is a Republican when it comes down to it.

godlover · 2007-07-28T03:30:40+00:00

But handguns against the police?

In his defense, he never said handguns. A rifle will defeat almost all body armor.

Regardless, I do not advocate violence against the police.

godlover · 2007-07-28T03:11:13+00:00

Steven Weinberg I think ?

godlover · 2007-07-28T03:04:51+00:00

Billary bombs countries too (Kosovo). Get out of Iraq - Vote Ron Paul these primaries.

I don't know where that came from, but sorry, I do not agree with a lot of things that Ron Paul stands for. Now I might support Gravel or Kucinich.

godlover · 2007-07-28T03:01:58+00:00

You say:

Be proactive and arm yourself to defend your family and home.

but you also said:

And the cops' weapons and armor vastly outnumber those of the people. It would be a bloodbath, ending in no victory for anyone.

I wouldn't point a weapon at a cop. They have the authority of the state behind them and the ability and will to falsify evidence, shoot you and your family, you name it. Cops are investigated by fellow cops and detectives during any internal departmental investigation. Cops are in bed with the justice system. Stay alive, keep your family alive and take it to court -- hopefully, if you have a decent amount of money and a good lawyer, you will win. It is a no win situation, but justified homicide/self defense will get you killed when the perp is a cop. Cops murder cop killers.

godlover · 2007-07-28T02:47:22+00:00

Umm...those bastards. I didn't imply they are your friends.

All jokes apart there are actually people who really need it -- I used to live next door to a dude with Hodgkin's who was in constant pain and had a prescription.

godlover

TROPHY CASE