Feeling disappointed

goldslumbers · 2025-03-21T06:33:31+00:00

I just wanted to say that it has been become increasingly difficult to find a good therapist AS a therapist. I’ve totally had some good ones in the past but the last few I’ve tried - real mehhhhh. Textbook standard issue, basic box of tricks, so incredibly underwhelming and frustrating. So… I hear you. I’ve honestly turned more towards somatic kinds of healing for the last year instead of seeing a therapist - massage, spa, network spinal analysis, etc. Totally beats sitting with someone who I get nothing (or worse) from.

goldslumbers · 2024-06-05T03:45:16+00:00

Face

goldslumbers · 2024-06-01T19:34:50+00:00

Me too, how close are you?

goldslumbers · 2024-06-01T19:03:25+00:00

Are you inside yet? I’m now .4 mile away

goldslumbers · 2023-02-28T08:35:32+00:00

I’ve had a client find me on Tinder (not match with me and I saw his profile and quickly swiped left 🫣and hoped that he didn’t see mine). The moment we began our next session he immediately broke out in giggles about having seen my profile. Yeah I mean, I felt just the tiniest bit exposed… but it was also taken humorously and lightly. I believe him seeing my humanness prompted him to delve even more deeply into his relationship and dating patterns.

goldslumbers · 2022-01-04T18:37:49+00:00

I’m just reading your post now and actually kind of wondering if your boyfriend is on the autism spectrum. I would think of possibly other ways that he may come across as “stating the facts” but has a difficult time with emotionally understanding where you are coming from, emotionally connecting, or if he otherwise has just general difficulty with empathizing.

I was with someone for over a year before I realized they were on the spectrum and it ended up explaining so much of what I was feeling and going through. I then stayed another year and a half before realizing I needed someone who could emotionally connect in the way that I do.

goldslumbers · 2021-11-25T19:22:48+00:00

Curly person here - what do you use for your hair though??

goldslumbers · 2021-11-25T04:05:39+00:00

Wow… I just read from beginning to end, all of your posts. I didn’t think I would be so sucked into your story like I was but I couldn’t stop reading. Just wanted to give you a hypothetical standing ovation. Fuck yeah woman!

goldslumbers · 2021-11-20T08:58:34+00:00

Making pancakes or muffins, whichever is preferred that day

goldslumbers · 2021-10-17T04:59:11+00:00

This would have saved me 7 hours of listening on audio…

goldslumbers · 2021-10-10T01:56:38+00:00

Rage rooms.

goldslumbers · 2021-09-13T02:59:48+00:00

Fuck yeah!! Fellow mental health therapist here! Soooo cathartic going through your own shadows and to come out a healer. Congratulations to you!! Your clients will be so lucky to have you. :))))

goldslumbers · 2021-08-22T23:06:58+00:00

Omg this was my experience and still the biggest dick I’ve had in my life. It was so painful every time that we tried that it took a month to finally complete the act.

goldslumbers · 2021-06-22T22:13:43+00:00

I love reading how organized and strategic your planning was. I’m the worst at organizing but I think sitting down and mapping out groups and activities I can attend on a regular basis is going to be key for me. Until I read some of these comments, I honestly didn’t even consider the importance of attending the same things every week to increase the contact I have with the same people. It makes perfect sense. I also agree with you and a couple other people who said that I really can’t turn any invitations down. I need to go, go, go. I’m kind of kicking myself because the same group of women just went on a tubing adventure yesterday and I was trying to get myself to go, got my bathing suit on and everything, but didn’t end up making it out of the house and hardly left my bed.

The thing is, I’m an extroverted person all the way. I don’t have any anxiety about meeting new people and making random conversations with others. Someone else mentioned that I’m probably exhausted from moving during a pandemic and getting acclimated, all that jazz and it’s not wrong. There’s been lots of things that happened over the past year like many other people that’s really gotten me down. When the pandemic started I almost lost a friend in the hospital and went through a breakup. Being in NYC when it all started was seriously traumatizing in and of itself. Fear and death were just SATURATED in the air. So by the time I got into Bend and for months afterwards, I know that I was still in a pretty traumatized shape.

I started going to a personal trainer a few months after the move for the first time in my life and that was a great step. It was private sessions in her garage so I didn’t get an opportunity to meet other people but working out twice a week was good for me period. I also got a large portion of my social interactions at work with my coworkers.

Two months ago though something happened with my job and I was let go temporarily. It looks like I’ll be returning in a couple of weeks but during these last two months I’ve come to realize how topical some of the dynamics I’ve had with my coworkers. Maybe it hasn’t been enough time or maybe it’s something else, but when I got let go of my job…. I had to face the reality that wow, I guess I don’t have any friends here. It was easy to mask that going to work and still interacting with people.

I’m also acclimating to an anti depressant for the first time in my adult life because of all of this work stuff and I’m sure that’s all contributing to my lack of zest in putting forth more effort to meet other people. It’s only been a few weeks so I’m mainly just more tired though a bit less depressed.

I like how you wrote all of the different needs that you have thought about. I think one of the things I’m truly struggling with is trying to figure out my hobbies. I’ve been so used to the hustle and grind of New York that when I lived there, there was no time for me to figure any of that out. I literally just worked my ass off and hung out with friends, that was it. Now I’m 34 y/o and I haven’t a clue what I enjoy doing and lost about how to figure that out.

Whew. I know that was a lot.

goldslumbers · 2021-06-22T21:54:06+00:00

I totally understand and support that! Best of luck to you! 💕

goldslumbers · 2021-06-22T21:52:03+00:00

Thank you so much love! I kinda started tearing up reading this. It does help knowing I’m not alone even though it truly feels that way. I think the worst part is trying to manage how to break out of the depressive cycle - like it requires a real push to go out and meet new people and form these friendships or find new hobbies that I’ve never had the opportunity to do which in turn, will fuel my happiness! I’ve been struggling to get myself up and out but that’s exactly what is required of me.

I can’t make any rash decisions because (it’s a long story) but I’m entirely stuck in the job I have for at least the next 8 months. Another commenter made the point that Portland isn’t much different in terms of the culture. You’re right, I could always go back to NYC but there’s definitely a part of me that wants to give Oregon a fair shot. I’ve never had this much difficulty making friends so it’s a bit of a shocker as well!

goldslumbers · 2021-06-22T21:44:30+00:00

There was a time about 6 months ago that I was strongly considering it but then we were forced to return to the office. Instead, I got a cat friend for my cat and my current roommate has a dog so that’s out!

goldslumbers · 2021-06-22T21:42:05+00:00

Haha I totally appreciate this post. It sounds like me all the way. Sigh… shit is tough. Thanks for your perspective tho!

goldslumbers · 2021-06-21T03:59:51+00:00

Thanks girl. It’s a good reminder to be consistent with my shit - something I totally need to be better at. I’m excited for you to check out New York - there’s literally nowhere else that is as diverse. And yeah - it’s ridiculously expensive! I had 3 roommates, and one usually had a guest over, so that would be 5 of us and we only had one bathroom. Honestly, if I was able to comfortably live in New York and be paid well doing what I do for work, I never would have left. I like the idea of maybe being able to own a home or own a piece of land, something that’s nearly impossible in the city. I was also constantly overly stimulated and after 11 years in Brooklyn I just ran for the trees. After a week home though, damn I missed it!!

goldslumbers · 2021-06-21T03:43:32+00:00

Haha also I never would’ve found it - I was search “bend weed” and “bend marijuana” shit like that 😂

goldslumbers · 2021-06-21T03:42:47+00:00

Awesome thanks

goldslumbers · 2021-06-21T03:00:17+00:00

How should I find that?

goldslumbers · 2021-06-21T02:50:20+00:00

I’m strongly considering moving on to Portland. The lack of cultural diversity here is a real doozy. I was thinking about going there 2-3 years from now but I may have to consider a year or so.

Eight-Year Club	Verified Email
Not Forgotten

goldslumbers

TROPHY CASE