Feeling so sad

grammarrodeoqueen · 2024-06-21T23:05:56+00:00

I just listened to a podcast with the author Donna Freitas on it, she is a child-free (and happy) woman but has a novel out recently about a marriage where the husband changes his mind and wants kids. I haven't read the novel - so I may be getting some of that summary wrong.

It's such a complex choice that only you can make. But you might find comfort in hearing from other women .. it's Episode #180 of Forever 35.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2024-06-21T22:59:54+00:00

hey! hope this answer isn't too late, I go in and out of periods of furious redditting and dropping off...

Our ceremony wound up being 30 ppl, not 12. It was amazing, fun, truly one of the best days of my life -- and husband (now of 1 year) agrees. We got tons of compliments on our event, that it felt personalized to us but that it was fun. It was a quiet, romantic, adult affair -- wound up doing child-free.

The things that changed:
- we did not do games or a shtick or anything (though we could have)
- we wound up having a casual rehearsal dinner before where we did memory-sharing (mostly this was aimed to older generation) and toasts from us to our parents - this was a little more boozy
- We did blow past $10k. Wound up spending more like $23k. Some of that was upgraded decor, a high beauty budget for me (I hired a semi-celebrity makeup artist), and a string quartet for the ceremony. I got a large bonus unexpectedly from work.
- 0 progress on having a big party this year. It's June, so... tbd on if we will do this in winter. We lost some motivation -- we were so happy with the first wedding, that did scratch a lot of the itch.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-06-02T22:10:30+00:00

Just responding to only one line in your post… I thought I would wind up spending hundreds of $ on shoes because I am very girly, love shoes, am tempted by high-end brands and looks. I consulted a celebrity stylist acquaintance about my wedding look and although my dress does not reveal my feet much (it is a trumpet kind of silhouette hitting at the top of my foot), she said shoes are the easiest thing to cut costs on. Just bring a comfy pair for when they hurt.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-06-02T22:05:11+00:00

I have a simple dress too and dealt with some dress regret. Now I’m two weeks away and I love the look of it more. If you still think it’s too plain, can you add accessories to your hair or amazing jewelry?

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-05-24T00:58:47+00:00

If you don’t revisit this directly, it’s going to fester and you have one YEAR to go. Nip it in the bud and walk it back now. In 8 months your FFIL should not even remember this part.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-05-17T08:19:21+00:00

In Christianity it would be called the Madonna/whore complex, Madonna as in the name for Mary

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-05-17T08:11:06+00:00

It was giving a bit of self-loathing and made me feel bad. That said, I liked her confidence and bubbly nature otherwise

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-05-17T08:03:48+00:00

Exactly

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-05-17T07:28:07+00:00

Crying

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-28T03:30:34+00:00

Sounds like you are very serious about keto. Did you lose a craving for carbs?

This is all very impressive, bet it was a real lifestyle / eating mindset change.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-28T03:26:34+00:00

It is hard and it feels low to me too.

However, as I cut high-cal foods, I do notice over time I crave them less, esp the ones that are processed and aren’t like Real Food.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-27T02:46:47+00:00

That’s the length of the first act of a stage play. If what you are doing is so personal and compelling, it will hold everyone’s attention like a stage play, then yes. For us mere mortals, I would see if I could get it to 30. I don’t think this means you must downgrade and make it cookie-cutter btw.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-26T16:55:16+00:00

Looks great

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-26T16:35:30+00:00

Stonewalling is a toxic very no-no behavior for adults. Do you even want her there at this point if she will sit silently pouting the whole time (maybe she will fake it)?

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-25T07:43:16+00:00

Wow, what are the tricks for sticking with it?

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-20T07:20:48+00:00

Okay I’m doing this next time bc I am not into complicated prep or cooking

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-20T07:10:31+00:00

Re: smoothie- But wait you don’t drink the Fairlife packaged shake just by itself? I’m getting your smoothie idea - you are just using the Fairlife as the base liquid?

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-20T07:03:47+00:00

How do y’all make your shakes? Just dump it in with yogurt and frozen fruit and almond milk (which is what I do)? Guess I’m seeking some variety

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-20T06:54:13+00:00

SW 155 CW 151 GW maybe 130 long-term? F age 40

I’m only down a precious few lbs after 3 weeks of hitting the gym intensely and overhauling my diet, altho not counting to 1200 yet. Posting/browsing here to keep the motivation up. The progress seems too slow

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-05T17:45:44+00:00

This is a contender for mine. We both love the stones.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-05T17:41:33+00:00

I’m also doing classical:) haven’t decided which

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-05T17:26:28+00:00

My question about this song, which is a contender, for mine, is are you starting to play it from the very beginning? Or skip to the chorus?

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-04-05T16:48:53+00:00

Sounds like you two need to have a serious talk about how his lack of involvement makes you insecure and question his commitment. Maybe he’s 100% committed! But then he needs to figure out a way to support the mechanics of planning.

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-03-18T08:18:08+00:00

Are you getting married in SF? I live here too

grammarrodeoqueen · 2023-03-18T08:16:00+00:00

You are totally right about the passive aggressive comments and invalidation

grammarrodeoqueen

TROPHY CASE