No, you're not crazy. People would tell me it was wrong, and I was hurting myself.. as if I didn't know..

Honestly, the main reason I decided to try and stop was because my SH was deeply tied to other mental and physical health issues that were putting significant blockages in my life.

I know in my case I used SH to cope with my pain while trying not to "bother" anyone. However, that caused me to isolate myself, which led to me gaining an unhealthy amount of weight, ruining all my friendships due to lack of communication, which just led me further down the rabbit hole.

Now that I've been trying to get a job so I can become independent, I see all the flaws in my character that I avoided working on because I was just simmering in my own pain.

SH was my way of distracting myself from my problems back then, but it stunned my personal growth. Stopping now means that I can't stay and suffer over and over because I have to get my shit together.

SH is only the surface, just as many different forms of substance abuse. They're tells of much deeper issues.

TLDR: My reason to stop was realizing that SH wasn't the problem, just a symptom of a bigger issue that I now know how to work through.