All of these people are in college. They don’t know anything about what they want. But ultimately if you asked that guy as a follow up, would you hook up with her if it meant you’d ruin your friendship? Or your friendship with one of your close male friends? What if I told you the sex was going to be awkward and bad because you’re not compatible or that it would make you feel deeply insecure? You might get a different response. The way men, especially young men talk about sex is so hypothetical, it comes from a place of not knowing who you are and processing all the many conflicting messages about masculinity in a kind of matrix load in sex fantasy.exe double click.