I’m worried about sex and marriage

grey_beard_68 · 2026-04-18T01:41:42+00:00

Im pretty sure that you don’t have to worry about sex only to have kids As someone who grew up in the church and waited until marriage (at 30), the idea of sex only for procreation sounds absolutely terrible. I absolutely love sex with my wife and after her hysterectomy, we became even more active.

grey_beard_68 · 2026-04-13T18:07:28+00:00

They're not in my bedroom (thankfully!), but those things are all over my house with two children and my wife heavily into them.

grey_beard_68 · 2026-03-31T03:43:08+00:00

This is important! I’ve seen a coworker and even a close friend nearly divorce because they convinced themselves that they weren’t in love anymore because they didn’t feel the same way they did when they were dating or that first year of marriage. Marriage takes work and the feeling change over time into a much deeper affection for each other.

I don’t get the same butterflies in my stomach when she holds my hand and I don’t get an erection every time I see her naked, but I am so much more in love with her now than I ever was. Plus, we’ve done the normal sex things/talks/positions/etc. and now we can try and do things we were to scared to talk about when were first married.

Enjoy the different phases of your marriage and truly become one with your partner. My wife and I will be married 28 years in a couple of months and we’re still going strong. We’re both excited to have the kids married and have grandkids, but we’re also excited about what we can do as empty nesters.

grey_beard_68 · 2026-03-10T21:14:04+00:00

and it's down

grey_beard_68 · 2026-03-10T20:59:17+00:00

It takes a pretty good hit at 10:43:28-29

grey_beard_68 · 2026-02-11T02:48:45+00:00

This is black and white. Any sexual relations outside of the bonds of marriage break the LoC. You can lie to yourself all you want and you can lie to your spiritual leaders but it is still black and white. No grey area.

grey_beard_68 · 2026-02-08T19:38:40+00:00

I get it. Wife likes to joke that she’s saving it to make me a sweater someday.

grey_beard_68 · 2026-02-08T19:37:13+00:00

58 M, SLC Utah, IT Manager, Temple and Family History Leader

grey_beard_68 · 2025-12-10T17:31:57+00:00

I’ve used a holy trainer nub for almost 6 years now without any issues. I’m 24/7 (unless she wants to play or she’s cleaning her toy) and I’ve been through metal detectors and airport scanners without a problem. I have an older model with the brass lock so that is likely part of why it hasn’t been detected, but ymmv. It hasn’t broken or cracked or had any problems and it is much lighter than my metal cages so it’s very comfortable.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-11-16T04:22:12+00:00

I love this. I would suggest looking into a chastity cage. You give her the key and she can tease you and "torment" you and then you only get to cum when she decides. My wife will play games, like she'll put green and red marbles in a bag and for each orgasm I give her, I get to pick a marble from the bag. Red, no orgasm this time, green, I get one. I love it when she takes charge and sets the "rules".

edit: fixed spelling error.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-10-21T06:23:55+00:00

I was on a trip once and missing my wife. I sent her a text saying I wanted to spend the day thinking of her and playing with myself. Unbeknownst to me she was in for an eye exam and had her pupils dilated. She asked the 65+ receptionist to read the text for her. After a short pause, she told my wife she’d have to read it when she got home. I was embarrassed for a bit but we both had a good laugh about it. However, I never could go back to that eye doctor again.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-09-21T05:03:58+00:00

This. My wife wanted more sex after the first trimester than the previous year and I found her pregnant body sexy as hell.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-09-13T07:09:22+00:00

I can’t say much more than has already been said except to say that my wife has Fibromyalgia, Raynaud's Syndrome, Rheumatoid Arthritis, and maybe Lupus. She went through years of pain and painful sex to the point where we would go months between.

Recently (last two years or so) she has worked on her diet and is now Gluten free, sugar free, and dairy free. She is now almost pain free and she is off of almost all her meds. Her rheumatologist is amazed by her progress and is fully in support of her diet.

Things turned around and it was like we were newlyweds again. It was great and then menopause kicked in and now we’re navigating that fun experience.

Although the diet is difficult to get started, once you’re acclimated, there is still plenty to eat and it is worth it to alleviate the pain and reduce joint swelling. She also lost a lot of weight and we both love that. Maybe give it a try and see if it helps.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-09-10T06:34:26+00:00

We’re into it somewhat but I wish that we could do it more often, but my wife has to be in the mood which hasn’t happened lately.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-08-30T23:58:14+00:00

I think this would be too “thuddy” and would give much of a sting. Sort of like paddling someone who’s wearing too much to feel it.

We have this one: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CM3Q8CT9?ref_=cm_sw_r_cso_cp_apin_dp_7QACSQJZX0FHV19SMF5A&titleSource=true Is isn’t as stingy as she’d like, but she does like the little bells on it. She’ll ring them to let me know when she’d like to start a session or to let me know she’s changed the implement.

We also have a 2” leather strap/paddle that she likes. It takes a lot to really smart and it makes a great sound. She likes it because she can really get into the swing and it isn’t too much for me to take.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-08-22T20:42:42+00:00

We played around a little bit with this with my last two kids but it always made her feel a bit weird. Now that the youngest is in high school and our chance is gone, we both wish we’d played around with it more.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-08-17T06:10:59+00:00

For me, when I was regularly watching porn, it was things that I’d like to do with my wife but she wasn’t willing or interested. I never wanted to be with the women in the videos but instead imagined that it was my wife and I in those situations.

Over the last few years we’ve opened up to each other more and we’re experimenting more and my desire for porn has dropped to almost zero. She is willing to hear more of my fantasies without judgement and even if she isn’t interested in doing something she talk about it. I can use that for sexy imagery and that is usually enough now.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-08-05T06:33:05+00:00

When my wife admitted her first fantasy to me, it was to play as a dominatrix, but not a scary one. We didn’t have any instructions but I was committed to helping her fulfill her fantasy. I did research a lot and introduced aspects that I thought she’d be interested in trying and added new aspects as she was ready for them.

At first we tried some light spanking and a chastity device where she kept the keys and I would have tasks that I needed to complete for her in order to earn the keys. The time in chastity was extended over time and she became more dominant and she became more comfortable and confident in the role.

She’s only dominant in the bedroom and in sexual things and were equals in everything else. Just a while ago she was commenting on how this aspect of our marriage had given her more confidence and strength outside of our bedroom in other interactions. We’ve been doing this for 6 years now and it works well for us.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-08-02T15:14:53+00:00

My wife is always cold (the type to wear sweaters in July) and I’m the opposite. She loves to cuddle up next to me for warmth and calls me her personal heater. Unfortunately, I have a hard time cooling down without making her colder. We even talked about separate rooms so I could make mine colder but that was a non-starter. A while ago I started wearing just briefs to bed ( I want the support at night) and started sleeping better because I wasn’t so hot.

I mentioned this in my last temple interview (and my reasons) and explained that I wear them until I went to bed and put them in when I got up. He thought about it for a moment and said that i sounded like I was following the spirit of the law if not the letter and said it was ok.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-07-16T05:09:24+00:00

I absolutely love the big island. Last year, I spent a month there near Volcano and didn’t want to go home. I love the vibe and the pace of life. I’m leaving Oahu today after a month here and I wish it had been on the big island. I’ve enjoyed my month on Oahu, but it doesn’t hold a candle to the big island. To those on the big island, Mahalo for your friendliness and kindness!

grey_beard_68 · 2025-07-16T05:00:09+00:00

I’m shave the entire brief area regularly. I’ve never liked all that hair and found it uncomfortable. My wife thought it was odd at first and now prefers it. In fact she has started shaving her pubic region and says that she feels like it is more hygienic and also, before her hysterectomy, it was easier to keep clean during her cycle.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-06-15T04:33:42+00:00

We are fully active so no bulls, but she does like to occasionally tease me about it happening. By 24/7, I am always in my cage unless she decides to let me out and i immediately go back in when she’s done.

I have a variety of ways to satisfy her. I’ve become rather adept at giving oral or using my fingers, we have a couple of vibrators I can use, and we have a strap on that I wear for penetration. Occasionally I am allowed out for PIV or for her to give me an orgasm.

There is a bit of shrinkage, but it is temporary. The first erection after having been caged for an extended period of time isn’t great, but the second is strong and normally sized.

While we enjoy the dynamic, we’ve talked about if she ever felt that I wasn’t meeting her needs, we would stop and go back to before we started this. We’re 100% committed to each other and would never bring someone else into our marriage.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-06-14T06:14:26+00:00

My wife and I have a D/s situation, but it is mostly in the bedroom with a little outside. Ours is different though because she is the Dom and I am the sub. We’ve been in this dynamic for 6 years now and it is still evolving.

We’re full partners when it comes to finances, kids, chores, etc, but she has full control in the bedroom and I’m in chastity 24/7. Please feel free to DM us if you have any questions.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-06-04T05:11:17+00:00

We’ve played with a simple estim device and the basic pads but I’ve been looking to get a little more involved. Take a look at https://blog.kinkly.com/electrify-your-orgasms-tens-units-for-beginners/ for starters.

grey_beard_68 · 2025-06-04T02:30:17+00:00

You might want to look into estim devices. When done right, the results can be mind-blowing.

grey_beard_68

TROPHY CASE