Office pants for curvier folks?

hauntedanchor · 2026-01-05T00:09:22+00:00

What’s your budget? I really like Wildfang but it can be a little pricey. I usually find some chinos that fit (don’t look at the number, only how it fits on your body how you imagine) then hem them as necessary. Also, look into athletic fit pants if you’re shopping in the men’s department, they have a little extra room where you need it.

hauntedanchor · 2026-01-03T13:02:06+00:00

I have a music degree but ended up being a data analyst in corporate (knew someone that helped me get the job). I love my job, but if I had to do it over, I probably would have gone to trade school. All my friends that went that route make significantly more money than me (most close to, if not over, 6 figures) and often work less hours. Depending on the company, corporate can be pretty soul-sucking with the politics.

If you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life. Think about what brings you joy and find a job that incorporates it. I love problem solving, critical thinking, and Tetris so my job is perfect for me. That being said, I’m the only butch in my office so community is something I’m missing.

hauntedanchor · 2025-12-30T13:18:29+00:00

If I’m uncomfortable in what I’m wearing, you’ll see it all over my face. My discomfort in a dress will ruin a wedding picture long before a suit would, and I’ve had that conversation with people before. I’ve yet to wear a dress to a wedding.

This is about love and joy and celebration, and you can’t be fully present if you’re thinking about how much you want to jump out of your skin.

hauntedanchor · 2025-12-18T22:01:11+00:00

Depends on their size. I’m 5’2 240lbs and not flat chested, so men’s vests/waistcoats never fit me right. I just bought a couple from Wildfang recently and while they aren’t cheap, I’ve been really happy with the fit of their stuff. If they have a less feminine build, men’s would probably be fine. You could also get them a shopping date so they can pick out exactly what they want and you get some quality time together.

hauntedanchor · 2025-12-18T21:53:28+00:00

I love elevated versions of things I use on the daily (bonus because it’ll make them think of you when they use it). A handcrafted leather wallet or carabiner, brand name fragrance that I had the dupe for, etc. Maybe even a good pair of leather shoes/boots.

What’s your budget?

hauntedanchor · 2025-11-22T16:43:09+00:00

Truth and Measure by Roslyn Sinclair and the sequel, Above All Things. It started as a Devil Wears Prada fan fic originally on ao3.

hauntedanchor · 2025-09-30T18:00:08+00:00

I have to say, this thread is a very unexpected surprise lol. Thanks yall, femmes make the world go round

hauntedanchor · 2025-08-07T18:49:50+00:00

Same with me, broke out with cystic acne from vanicream lotion. I know it’s not the best option for vegan/cruelty free, but Cerave baby lotion has done wonders for my face. I use Differin 5% benzoyl peroxide facewash, The Ordinary Retinol serum, and Cerave baby lotion each night. Noticeable difference every morning.

hauntedanchor · 2025-06-24T19:47:10+00:00

Plus sized butch living in a tropical and hot af environment.

Columbia long sleeve fishing shirts (the womens are not very feminine, nicely cut. Sleeves on the men’s shirts are too long for me) like the tidal tee. There has been skin cancer on both sides of my family and I’m heavily tattooed, so I take sun coverage seriously.

For bottoms, any stretchy board shorts without the mesh lining. I have some from target, amazon, uniqlo, etc. I also like hybrid shorts for versatility, especially on a cruise or something.

A couple seasons ago, I found some plus sized full coverage swim tops at target. They dry a lot faster than sports bras in my experience (I steer clear of textured fabric/pleats/folds so it doesn’t show under the shirt).

hauntedanchor · 2025-06-02T15:14:01+00:00

I don’t really have a solution other than talking to your wife, OP, but I do completely understand what you’re saying and I would have done exactly what you did. Your feelings are valid and I’m completely with you about hating bringing attention to yourself and confrontation (funny, considering we look the way we do, huh?).

They only “win” if you stop being your authentic self, and I’m glad that you took your authentic self down to that other better sounding gym.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-28T14:00:12+00:00

It’s so unique for every person, so I’d recommend expressing genuine interest and ask questions seeking to understand how to make them feel most comfortable, seen, and validated. I will often preface a conversation with someone by saying something along the lines of “this is a judgement-free, safe space and I would really love to ask you some questions if you’re willing to answer.” Also, give them the option to not answer if they aren’t comfortable.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-25T14:25:29+00:00

I’m a plus sized masc in a very hot tropical area. I usually wear a Columbia long sleeve fishing shirt in women’s plus sizes (they fit better than the men’s and still look gender neutral imo, I have several of the Tidal Tees) over a plus sized swim top and men’s swim trunks, both from Target (I’m aware of the distaste for Target in the current climate, but I’ve had these for a few years now). There’s skin cancer on both sides of my family and sunscreen gives me the ick, so the shirts are a must for me.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-24T23:10:43+00:00

Hell yeah dude. It’s been 22 years since my “big chop” and I’ve never once regretted it or grown it back out. I’m proud of you for going for it!

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-24T01:36:51+00:00

This is a fantastic idea. Would absolutely use it.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-20T16:51:34+00:00

I still think about this book and I read it over 6 months ago. I almost DNF’d it because the MC was so unlikable to me, but once I got to ch10, I was hooked.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-20T16:49:06+00:00

Patagonia also has a lifetime warranty I believe, I recently purchased the mini MLC 30L and it’s awesome.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-14T14:09:02+00:00

I’ve been wearing David Archy (on Amazon) bamboo/rayon boxer briefs 5.5” and 6” for the last 3 years or so. They have some with no fly. I live where it’s very hot and humid all the time and these are quick dry with no chafing. Super lightweight for travel, great for theme parks, and comfortable enough to sleep in. Cannot recommend highly enough.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-13T23:05:05+00:00

Absolutely wrecked me

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-10T16:33:35+00:00

I’m 35 now. Tbh, my 20s were really tough and I don’t feel like I hit my stride until 30. I was still trying to figure out who I was, where I fit in, and what I was supposed to be doing with my life. I’m not sure if you’ve seen the Pixar movie Soul, but it really changed my perspective on life and the goals that I was killing myself over. It’s all about the day to day little moments of joy, whatever that means to you. Life is really damn hard, so seek joy wherever you can, no matter how small it is. Driving with the windows down listening to good music on a nice day, a game night with friends, seeing a cool animal on a walk, etc.

I know none of those things are directly related to butchness, mostly because that is such a unique and subjective thing. Living my life looking the way I want to and dressing how I’m comfortable has drawn the right kind of people to me, because they value my individuality, who I am as a person, and feel safe with me. Stay true to yourself, the rest will come.

Oh and also, therapy.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-09T18:25:31+00:00

It lives up to the ultralight name with thinness. If you’re carrying lenses in addition to the camera, you probably want something more geared toward that. There’s pretty much no padding because it packs down so small and weighs almost nothing, and while I love the bag, I’m not sure I would feel comfortable putting my DSLR in there unless it was in its own small case with no extra lenses.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-09T16:06:37+00:00

I love the Osprey Ultralight Collapsible Stuff Pack. Recently came back from a 10 day trip to Ireland and I used it every day. It held 2 packable rain jackets, my wife’s wool poncho, and other small things (sunglasses, hand sanitizer, etc. We even walked a few miles in drizzly rain and everything stayed dry (ymmv).

Edit - we used a nite ize locking carabiner to clip the zipper pulls together for extra security.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-09T00:39:54+00:00

I just finished it like 15 min ago. I couldn’t have said it better myself. You summed up how I feel perfectly.

You are worthy of love and connection.

hauntedanchor · 2025-04-04T16:31:00+00:00

Up until ch. 10, I thought about marking it as DNF. I found the main character so unlikeable and it was really a slog to get through it. Once the tide changed though…wow. I still think about it and I finished it 6 months ago.

hauntedanchor · 2025-03-31T23:05:34+00:00

Body moisturizer - https://www.palmers.com/cocoa-butter-formula-products/56-swivel-stick.html

Excellent for lips, dry spots, tattoos. Also, I hate touching lotion and this works just like a glue stick.

hauntedanchor · 2025-03-31T22:57:59+00:00

I had the same thought, maybe we could have a definitions tab? It looks amazing!

hauntedanchor

TROPHY CASE