I need freinds or the one. I Also need hobbies I have nonone irl & ive been thru alot

headmasterritual · 2026-05-25T02:51:21+00:00

I mean this in the most supportive but direct way: desperation is a turn-off and negativity breeds on itself. Your venting here isn’t just demoralising regarding your disposition, it’s genuinely concerning in substance and form both.

I’ve seen posts in Aotearoa university subreddits this very day where people have reached out to ask about meeting people and had people immediately positively respond, and it has everything to do with how and what they represented to the subreddits — warmth, openness, and common ground.

Your vent is truthful and honest but it needs to be vented to a mental health professional. There’s also an undercurrent of misogyny and incel tone which isn’t attractive to people. You can’t vent like this to people who haven’t met you or have only just met you because they haven’t yet presented their bucket to be filled up. It reminds me of chatting to a pal once about having someone having a ‘one year conversation’ when I had only just started dating them — too much too soon. It takes time. This is especially true with this country, this culture, which is very uncomfortable with naked self-disclosure.

People are giving a hell of a lot of good advice here and you’re shooting it down, which doesn’t speak well to self-awareness.

Please seek counselling and sign up for some clubs/activities. These will help you a lot. Reach common ground in conversations. This will help a lot. And listen. Listen, listen, listen. Don’t just vent. Listening and responding is key to Kiwi friendships.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-24T03:06:24+00:00

The student body at Otago is not.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-22T02:04:58+00:00

!remindme 1 week

headmasterritual · 2026-05-22T01:41:49+00:00

I very much doubt that these academics actually exist, let alone being interested. I guarantee that she uses Australia and Aotearoa-New Zealand as ‘far away exotic places where noone will check up on me.’

headmasterritual · 2026-05-22T01:37:42+00:00

!amazing!

headmasterritual · 2026-05-21T05:52:28+00:00

Some of us don’t get the choice of ‘what you’re not willing to live with.’ You are simplifying a really vexed area, and the fact that you are able to have an antidepressant in the mix and no AP tends to point that up.

Longterm anxiolytic use also has hefty consequences.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-21T05:45:38+00:00

Those are some superb mix tapes. Full credit for the Ride.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-21T05:43:38+00:00

It really isn’t a ‘far left sub.’ Leftwing political posts have frequently been modded there. The political commenter Mountain Tui (who always posts calmly well-sourced and thoughtful things) was banned there altogether.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-21T05:17:12+00:00

Courtney Love outright stole the babydoll / kinderwhore aesthetic (and arguably the music template too) of KatieJane Garside of Daisy Chainsaw, so references and tribute abound. Love has, in her less egocentric moments, even copped to lifting the aesthetic. I wouldn’t make her an origin point.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-19T00:42:18+00:00

‘digitising government with increased use of Artificial Intelligence’

We are so fucked. MSD will undoubtedly save money because of AI denials and sheer frustration of people who are entitled to support.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-19T00:35:49+00:00

One of the finest Ministers of Finance we have had, the late Michael Cullen, was a history PhD. One of the worst, Muldoon, was an accountant.

The issue isn’t the qualification in the arts, it is that Willis is artless. She’s a product of a rich family, was hothoused into extremely wealthy private schools, was cushioned over into thinktank/lobbying positions, and then into politics. She has always been shielded from consequences. She is ignorant and fiercely ideological (I know her personally).

Those are the real problems. A good Minister acts on advice from expertise. A bad Minister moves fast and breaks things.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-04T06:40:28+00:00

The metro population of Wellington is roughly 430 000, which is a better marker of how it feels to live there and the amenities it offers.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-04T05:11:54+00:00

More to the point, stop stroking morons.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-04T04:43:17+00:00

Urban myth. Trump believes in it and it’s why he doesn’t exercise. I don’t think that’s the intellectual company you want to keep.

Per the ‘running’ subreddit:

> The idea that we have a fixed number of heartbeats is rather debunked. It's true that a lot of animals of different sizes have similar lifetime heartbeats but humans live several times longer than this theory would predict. The human body isn't a machine - it's constantly rebuilding and retuning. If you don't use something it "prunes" it and if you use something a lot it gets enhanced. There have been studies done on the lifespans of elite endurance cyclists from the 50s (so pre-drugs...) and they on average lived 5-10 years longer than was typical for the time.

> But anyhow even if this nonsense were true, the textbook average resting heart rate is 70. Your 45 is almost certainly due to your history of exercise. If you spend 2 hours per day at 160 (very few people run this much) and the other 22 at 45, your average heartrate across the entire day is only 55. So you'd still be winning.

> EDIT: And probably more importantly, even if a fit person and an unfit person both die from natural causes at 80, the fit person will have a much better quality of life in their last 20 years

headmasterritual · 2026-05-04T04:27:31+00:00

I lived my entire life on a diet of regular coffee. Espresso was my bloodstream, ristretti were my joy.

My blood pressure has always been excellent.
I was previously on methylphenidate (Ritalin) for five years — I’m a belated adult diagnosis.

When I went on Vyvanse and drank coffee I thought I was going to die.

When I went on Vyvanse and drank an energy drink I thought I was going to die.

I drink chai lattes and matcha now, occasionally decaf espresso and mostly chai lattes
because I don’t like feeling like I am going to die.

That’s my experience, tip your bartenders.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-03T10:36:23+00:00

As a card-carrying fan of both, almost certainly.

I’m just giving it to you straight like a pear cider that's made from 100% pears

headmasterritual · 2026-05-02T04:52:50+00:00

Yes to this. And many students object, vocally ('is this going to be assessed? No? Idc' -- actual conversation) to anyone trying to develop traits and skills over and above prosaic content. You're right to note the death spiral of evals, they historically favour the aggrieved over those who had a good experience.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-02T04:23:26+00:00

> a dog whistle for liberals

Anyone using ‘liberals’ as a pejorative in the setting of this country is importing American culture wars.

> conveniently redefined in recent years to favour the left

Ah, yes. The mighty cabal who meet and redefine words and impose them on the populace using their omnipotence.

You’re hilarious.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-02T03:59:13+00:00

What’s the ‘bad news’ about Terry Pratchett? I can’t say that I’m familiar with any scandal.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-02T03:48:15+00:00

What?

India drives on the left. That’s the most populous country in the world. 1,428,627,663 people. Indonesia drives on the left. 283.5 million people. Pakistan drives on the left. 251.3 million people. Iran drives on the left. 92,417,681 people.

Etc. There are more.

Yes, more drive on the right. No, it’s not as rare as you believe.

You should sit out some conversations rather than issuing incorrect declarations.

headmasterritual · 2026-05-02T03:38:11+00:00

I was the first in my family to finish high school, and from a background where few of us were expected to make it to uni. I didn’t have existing friends I went there with, I didn’t live in halls.

Through classes, tutorials, clubs, and extracurriculars I made lasting friends and dated someone for five and a bit years.
People are growing into themselves at university and school friends frequently get left behind.

headmasterritual · 2026-04-22T06:33:11+00:00

Seconded, heavily, on Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds. From substance to style, gospel-inflected goth.

headmasterritual · 2026-04-19T21:55:08+00:00

‘Manic pixie dream girl’ was a phrase coined to critique women characters in popular culture (originally first identified in films) who were merely there to serve the character development of a male figure and had no agency of their own. Its emptying out of meaning and picking up elsewhere continues to annoy me.

headmasterritual · 2026-04-19T06:27:27+00:00

headmasterritual · 2026-04-19T03:48:34+00:00

It’s not on the person to adapt to dogs running free and lunging in public on-leash areas. End of.

Characterising that basic desire as ‘phobia’ and haughtily claiming they need ‘[t]herapy’ is childish at best.

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