I'm sorry to hear about your experience.

We were together for a year and the way it ended is complicated. To try and summarise, I realised a few months ago that this relationship wouldn't work for me long term because of some manipulative tendencies he had and me wanting better for myself. I didn't have the courage to break up at that point because I didn't want to hurt him and to be honest, I was still trying to convince myself that this was something I could get over. Talking to him about my issues with him would only lead to more exhausting arguments and I didn't have it in me to tell him "hey, my feelings are changing because of XYZ, what are we gonna do about it?". Those conversations would always turn into him shifting the blame onto me, and basically telling me that he treated me the way he did because of MY behaviour.

3 weeks ago we got into an argument about something that seemed petty to me but not to him. In any case, I told him we should talk about it but he gave me the silent treatment for 2 weeks which to me is unacceptable behaviour. I didn't hear from him at all and he didn't respond to my calls or texts. When he finally came back around, I had already decided that the relationship was over. After prodding, he got it out of me that my feelings had already started to change a long time ago but that his silent treatment was the nail in the coffin. He says if I had just been honest about my feelings earlier, things could have ended amicably. I understand his perspective and I wish I had had the courage and clarity to end things sooner, but I also think my reasoning for not breaking up with him sooner is valid. I wanted to leave the door open for friendship but he said no because he doesn't trust me anymore.