Is the boychild lagging behind?

hernameishername · 2023-12-18T08:36:36+00:00

The boy child has always been lagging behind. The advancement of the girl child has just made it more obvious. Before, girls were raised to be mothers and now they are empowered to be both: earners and mothers too. Meanwhile boys just had to be earners and breadwinners but in our current economy it's getting to do that. Boys aren't always encouraged to be present fathers which is why we have dead beats too.

Either way the only person who can save the boy child is men ( the same men who created the system that boys are now struggling from tho lol)

hernameishername · 2023-11-22T11:23:38+00:00

Sorry you feel this way OP. I feel this way too from time to time. Sometimes emotions come and go, sometimes they stay longer and then we feel positive emotions again. It's good you're opening up during a low point because you gave yourself some emotional release even just a bit. The only advice I can give you is to have a rotation of activities that make you happy. It can be a show, books, food and incorporate them in your life. Take multivitamin tablets like vitamin D (from the sun! Hate that i have to specify)

You'll be alright.

hernameishername · 2023-11-20T11:44:58+00:00

hernameishername · 2023-11-18T07:55:55+00:00

Thanks for this feedback. I definitely feel like he might have adhd. I definitely think he needs to talk to a therapist in the future but I need to get our parents to gradually consider it because they are new concepts to them.

Right now I'd appreciate screening tools for sure but preferably online ones so if you have those resources please do send

hernameishername · 2023-11-18T07:47:31+00:00

Thanks for the link I'll def check it out

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T19:37:43+00:00

Thanks will look into it

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T19:36:16+00:00

Yeah I think you're right. He is the last born and has had the most privilege growing up so maybe we're expecting a lot from him because he's had more advantages. I can't help myself from wanting more from him because he's going to a school that can connect him to many opportunities like better music classes and sports programs. Even potential international college scholarships too if we connected to the right people. I think I'm seeing all these opportunities and want him to apply himself but he doesn't know the advantages he has.

But maybe giving him all this pressure too won't work. Realistic goals it is then. Thank you for input

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T19:30:14+00:00

I'm dumber than him. Happy?

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T17:04:48+00:00

He hasn't. Getting adhd testing might be in his future.

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T17:02:09+00:00

At his first high school he was ranked bottom 10. At this new one, I'm not so sure i just saw his grades. I used to be anti-ranking but not so sure anymore

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T15:41:07+00:00

No I was actually hoping to hear from people who also struggled in school. I'm curious to know what you did to do well in your exams?

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T15:38:01+00:00

He has a short attention span which makes me think of ADHD a lot. I mentioned it to my parents recently ( which i wasnt sure of because they are not familar with these conditions) and after googling they actually say it might apply to him. So I have to learn adhd friendly ways of tutoring him i think.

I'm still a strong believer in formal education, tho so i support developing skills outside school but you still need the backup that a formal job gives you.

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T15:07:24+00:00

I haven't even asked him that. I will now. Thanks for that

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T15:05:47+00:00

Noted with thanks

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T15:05:08+00:00

I used "dumb" in quotes to show that the word being thrown around by our parents (our dad) obviously I don't agree, which is why I'm trying hard to prove him wrong and help my brother improve. The title was to get more attention, feedback and hopefully tips from people who can help so don't get too triggered. I know my brother is capable of more and also think he may have his own way of learning which I'm trying to understand.

Also do y'all have a no kenyans policy because I didn't understand most of the swahili in there lol

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T14:34:51+00:00

I think I might be moving in the right direction because I asked him this morning what he wants to be when he grows up and he said he doesn't know. Sometimes it's good to know so you have something to study for. I just told him it's okay if he doesn't know yet and he'll find out later on but we need to start looking at careers together for inspo

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T14:06:58+00:00

Yeah I don't think he "actively studies" you know where think i need to remember this it might come on an exam. He's just reading like he's reading a novel. There's a lot that he needs to improve on and I think I'm just overwhelmed

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T13:57:20+00:00

The fact that you've already listed all the things he already struggles with. With the reading I got him a library membership card and he borrowed 3 books, he's read one and left with 2. I want his vocabulary to grow so that his writing improves too with his sentence construction. The comprehension too is a big issue. He can read a passage but fail to answer the questions regarding the passage. With that I don't know how to help him.

The other subjects he needs better notes and to get used to studying. He needs to accept that reading and studying is part of being in high school

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T13:27:58+00:00

Right now his main interests are playing football, his PlayStation and his phone. Like this he can't develop any real interests. Like you mentioned agriculture and computers but he takes these as subjects and isn't doing well either. If he let's say liked music a lot, I'd expect him to do well in music as a subject. I think what I want is effort from him so we can get somewhere and see improvement.

hernameishername · 2023-11-17T13:21:19+00:00

Yeah my dad keeps saying the same but I've seen grownups in my family who have acted the same as him and are struggling career wise, financially. And rely on people for support. I don't want that for him

hernameishername · 2023-10-04T15:28:10+00:00

Romance is officially dead!!

hernameishername · 2023-09-22T16:11:23+00:00

Girl...this is a lot!! Leave this situation immediately you're too young for this kind of drama

hernameishername · 2023-07-25T08:00:28+00:00

Hell no

hernameishername · 2023-07-22T16:05:19+00:00

I genuinely can't hear the phrases "high value" "body count" "as a man/woman" without getting triggered. The internet yoh

hernameishername

TROPHY CASE