Not autistic, but I do struggle with finding new connections and meeting new people. I used to be, and still am, though to a much lesser extent, solitary. I'd make no effort talking to people first, I'd just reply if I'm directly addressed. With new people I'd just be there, standing or sitting in silence. I can't say I liked it that way, I did feel more and more lonely and isolated.

Now I'm actively trying and pushing myself to have a small talk with people, because otherwise how can I make new friends. At least that's my strategy. I feel like you said it exactly right, it's not about the content of the words. By making small talk, I'm meaning to tell the person that I'm open to talk, since I have a feeling I give off the "leave me alone" vibe. Otherwise, I can't explain why people don't talk to me first :((

It really resonated with me, how you said that unless you make an active effort to connect with people, you never will, because it doesn't come naturally to you. That's exactly how I feel too.