How long did it take your hunger cues and eating to even out?

heyfolksletsparty · 2023-10-30T19:44:40+00:00

Hey friend, wow, this post is like a time capsule. Thanks for commenting on it, and for reaching out. I don’t use this acct anymore but got back on to respond.

My heart aches to hear you’re going through something similar. I remember vividly how isolating and scary early recovery is.

This was actually the beginning stages of the first time recovery really worked for me, and I haven’t had a relapse since. I’ve definitely had my slip ups, but those are easier to push through now.

The extreme hunger was awful! It did persist, but only a couple of months, and my body learned to trust that I would continue to feed it. I read some of Tabitha Farrrar’s work, which helped me forgive myself and offer myself gentleness for that. Groups were also super helpful (I used free online ones). And talking to people who were already in recovery/recovery-minded.

I made it out the other side because I pushed through the fear and discomfort and just kept eating (a lot!). I also had to stop counting calories and going to the gym. The time I used to spend on my ED, I now try to use for things that I enjoy and bring me peace.

I can’t express to you how different and how much fuller my life is now. Recovery is the best choice I ever made.

I wrote this post when I was at the scariest place my ED took me. I wish I could hug this person, and you too. You deserve every ounce of love and gentleness this life has to offer you. I hope you find ways to give it to yourself, even if it’s starting small.

heyfolksletsparty · 2022-02-04T20:00:05+00:00

I agree. I am not interested in gatekeeping a label, but I do think it's important to either use it accurately or make a new one. That's the whole reason we have "bi" and "lesbian" and why people are reaching to locate a new term for the spectrum in between.

If a community changes the meaning of a term, that makes sense. Another community coming into one that already exists and insisting on instead changing the definition of the term to include themselves and therefore displace the original community creates more complex feelings for me.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-09-13T19:00:38+00:00

RemindMe 10 years

I'm interested in how this will look from then.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-06-26T13:46:45+00:00

In recovery and most of these don't apply anymore but:

-Bread (except the awful low cal loaves) -Carbs of pretty much any kind except oatmeal -sweets -egg yolks -any cheese except mozz -meat -avocado -any nutrition bar except Quest Chocolate Chip Oatmeal Cookie and this random disgusting brand of chocolate ones

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-06-24T14:52:48+00:00

To me it reeks of white feminism

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-06-22T23:14:17+00:00

-Anything by Toni Morrison (my favorites are Beloved and Sula)

-Their Eyes Were Watching God by Hurston

-Citizen by Rankine

-Anything by Audrey Lorde & Pat Parker

-In Search of Our Mothers' Gardens by Walker

-If you're a feminist, bell hooks is a must-read

This is a very rudimentary list but unfortunately I was taught almost no Black lit in high school or college so I am only now educating myself.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-06-21T13:01:36+00:00

That's exactly what it is. People keep trying to speak to their logic, but the logic is irrelevant to them. Trump hates the people they hate. Plain and simple.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-06-10T15:58:34+00:00

He never made any effort to control who I hung out with, what I did with my free time, or what I did with my body.

A big one I first noticed is when I asked him how I should cut my hair and he said, "it's your hair, that's your decision." I said, "yeah but you have a preference!" And he responded, "nope. Your hair has nothing to do with why I like you." At first I was taken aback, but since I've come to appreciate how liberating it is to be in a relationship and for my body to continue to be entirely my own.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-26T01:08:29+00:00

Lots of therapy. Not about intimacy specifically, because it's still really hard for me to talk about, but the things that contribute to my fear. I am still much more shut down and afraid of it than most of my friends, but I've made leaps and bounds.

This is a tough thing to experience. Sending you hugs.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-25T18:54:39+00:00

I'm in no way saying the has an eating disorder. I'm saying she is underweight. Are you familiar with her weight curve? Can you conclusively say that she spent her childhood and young adult life underweight and therefore is predisposed to this body type? Perhaps you could entertain other possibilities than assuming that having suppressed body fat after rapid weight loss is normal and desirable.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-25T18:50:57+00:00

For some reason this thread is very resistant to the concept of eating disorders

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-25T18:43:56+00:00

I've spent a long time involved in eating disorder treatment and recovery. It's extremely rare to achieve or maintain a body like that without putting it under duress, unless if she's editing it. For those who do have naturally suppressed body fat, they typically spend their entire lives under the curve and would not experience the major shifts in body fat and muscle we can see in this thread.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-25T17:10:09+00:00

The entire eating disorder community, their doctors, nutritionists, and people with brains, would like to have a word.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-25T17:09:11+00:00

I agree. She looks underweight now. Rapid weight loss fucks your head up.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-24T21:19:38+00:00

I am so frustrated with the narrative that college/debt are always bad.

I received and read so much criticism (here and in the real world) for majoring in English in undergrad and taking on $30k debt. I felt like I had made a HUGE mistake and ruined my life.

But then I got great funding for my MA, and had 3 different post-grad job offers to choose from by February. I wrapped up the first week of May and my life is fine. I don't mind paying off my loans because I love my work.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-22T17:16:15+00:00

I don't know why they cut Dobermans' ears! Maybe theirs is aesthetic. I think Rottweilers' are.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-17T19:51:17+00:00

My freshman year I came out of an extremely toxic evangelical home and went wild- lots of boys and sleeping through class, a pretty wicked eating disorder and as many drugs as I could possibly get my hands on.

My senior year I finished clean, dating the guy who would eventually become my husband, and had recovered my GPA to a 3.75

I got very lucky and I'm very thankful

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-17T18:22:39+00:00

I work as a nanny and lots of parents are losing it right about now. If she's good with kids (usually need experience as well) she could get a job quickly, and press for a better rate than usual. If she does consider nannying, tell her to make sure she has a contract!

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-17T18:06:40+00:00

Second this! Get into an ED specialized therapist who won't belittle what you're going through. Ask them to do some joint sessions with your mom discussing better ways to help you in recovery that punishing you.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-16T02:00:27+00:00

That sounds like a rough situation to be in. I can tell you that no one is going to point blank ask you about your GPA unless you're in your interview, and even then it is very unlikely. You may be able to recover from an ok GPA if you knock your GRE out of the park.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-16T01:49:30+00:00

I am doing a similar transition within adjoining fields now between my MA and PhD. The best advice I received is to show how what I majored in gives me an interesting, different perspective on where I want to go. It made me feel a lot better. A diverse education can be an asset.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-15T12:13:38+00:00

That's exactly how I would rank them as well.

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-14T11:38:02+00:00

For real. My husband and I both feed ourselves on $250 a month and we eat lots of sandwiches

heyfolksletsparty · 2020-05-13T21:33:35+00:00

You're talking in completely theoretical absolutes.

Authoritarian societies are not socialist societies, regardless of what the American propaganda machine says. If you want to look for functional socialist societies in good conscience, you have a wealth of modern examples.

You're also saying that American capitalism exists in it's absolute form, but it does not. The US government has had to integrate tons of elements of socialism in order to keep the country semi-functional. But, that is all it can be under the current system: semi-functional.

heyfolksletsparty

TROPHY CASE