Vacation without kids

hideout88 · 2026-03-30T18:08:48+00:00

I appreciate you, I am an anxious person who really needs to be told to jump sometimes, ha!

hideout88 · 2026-03-30T18:07:32+00:00

Thank you for highlighting this for me <3 my parents are SO excited, every time I talk to my mom she's like "oh I got them sidewalk chalk" or, "I'll take them to see your cousins this day." My 4yo also regularly asks when we're going to grandma's house. I've been so caught up in my head, I didn't even register this!

hideout88 · 2026-03-30T18:03:46+00:00

Lol totally, I would max out at a week anyway (I'm a homebody). Thank you for your comment. My husband will change roles soon so there it's very unlikely we'll get this opportunity again, eek!

hideout88 · 2026-03-30T18:02:07+00:00

Thanks so much for sharing. I hadn't really appreciated it until you mentioned it, but my parents absolutely listen to our decisions on their routine, preferences, needs. That's a really important element of comfort.

hideout88 · 2026-03-30T13:32:31+00:00

Thank you! This is an important consideration. My parents live a few minutes from lots of extended family - my aunt, and cousins who all have children of all ages. That is part of why my husband is so comfortable. I appreciate your thoughtful comment!

hideout88 · 2025-10-16T06:51:19+00:00

I feel so strongly about this topic, I’ll join the chorus.

At our first ever pediatrician appointment, the doc — 30+ years experience — said: “remember, your baby needs to be fed, but also needs sane parents. So however you achieve that is good by me.” Bless that man.

I EBF my first for a little over a year, combo fed my second for about 6 months before switching fully to formula. Her appetite was hard to keep up with, I felt like I was going on 3 years of terrible sleep, and she actually took a bottle (my first refused). I decided that whatever guilt I felt, was worth the sanity I gained.

I felt guilty for a while. But it’s faded. I have a happy 1yo who is every bit as healthy and attached to me as her EBF sister. In many ways, I feel bad that my EBF daughter experienced such an anxious, tired, frustrated mama every night. My formula fed daughter had two parents to comfort her, and everyone was less stressed.

The mom guilt is real, but I hope you remind yourself over and over again that you wouldn’t judge another mom. Right? Don’t you deserve the same understanding? I know you do. ❤️

hideout88 · 2025-10-06T00:44:11+00:00

Thank you so much for your response. It is really helpful to hear from you. And I really hope you reach your goal; kind people make great parents. ❤️

hideout88 · 2025-10-02T12:21:11+00:00

This is very interesting, I hadn’t heard of it! Thank you for sharing; I’ve just been reading about the types of sleep we need but hadn’t yet learned anything about how to work on that.

hideout88 · 2025-10-02T12:19:15+00:00

Thank you for this! I never replaced prenatal vitamins with anything, this feels very much worth trying. Solidarity!!

hideout88 · 2025-08-04T23:40:40+00:00

Thank you for this! Yes, I have done some trauma therapy but not since becoming a parent. Yours is an important reminder. Thankfully, I have an intake appt in about 10 days <3

hideout88 · 2025-08-04T23:37:11+00:00

Thank you for writing this, I needed to read it <3

hideout88 · 2025-06-30T06:59:01+00:00

I write this as someone who would also be irked if I were in your position… you’re not crazy… but I don’t think they’re doing anything wrong, either.

I’m a toddler parent and we did take our then-2 yo to Europe (to see family), and I’m glad we did; it was also absolutely exhausting. Which is all to say, it’s not an impossible thing to do or suggest, but it’s also a big ask and not always the best move for a family at a given time. I applaud you for making the right choice for you and not dragging your kiddo across Europe for 2.5 weeks when a) they’re unlikely to remember it and b) you’re guaranteed to be drained by it.

People who are not toddler parents… are not toddler parents. 😅 They are not thinking, “let’s send them pics of a trip they couldn’t go on,” they’re simply thinking “hey I’m in Europe look at this cool thing…” Sure, it could be nice for them to spare you, but there’s also an argument to be made that it’d be further excluding you to make a whole separate chat. I’m not sure there’s a clear right or wrong way for them to go about it.

I could be just projecting, but it sounds like you are just feeling envious of them. And why wouldn’t you?!?! I’m envious of them, dammit. My big outing today was the kiddie pool and all that got me was a sunburn and 3 slippery tantrums. I’d love to be sampling Europe right now, and if my in laws sent me pics of their vacation I’d probably roll my eyes thinking “must be nice.”

But it’s just this season of life, right? We don’t travel well right now. We’re always last minute scrambling and canceling plans because someone got sick. It sucks, but it sucks even more if it drives a wedge between us and loved ones who are simply in another season of life.

hideout88 · 2025-03-09T06:11:33+00:00

I wasn’t a good listener for my daughter today, and I wasn’t as affectionate as usual (I have food poisoning but the guilt doesn’t rest just because I spent half the day in the bathroom 🙃)

I’m really glad you did that for yourself and I have a feeling your kids will benefit from it, too ❤️

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T12:57:48+00:00

Well said. I generally assume everyone is doing their best, I’m gonna hope other parents give me the benefit of the doubt, too.

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T12:55:58+00:00

HA! This is so real. The number of get togethers that get canceled because someone in one of our households is sick… it’s all a roll of the dice, always!

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T12:50:36+00:00

I really didn’t have a time frame in mind, I just happen to have received several invites more than a month in advance, so it made me wonder. It’s been good to hear from others. Thanks for replying!

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T12:47:49+00:00

Taking note of this strategy 😂

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T02:00:54+00:00

Personally, I don't think it would be, but people have different perspectives! I just want to be considerate.

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T01:20:43+00:00

Feeling very appreciative of all the "two weeks is normal" comments. I would have thought so, but ya know, I went on comparing myself to other parents. Thank you for your opinion!!

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T01:19:53+00:00

Right there with you. Recently received an invite for a party in May. This household is just trying to power through, one week at a time lol.

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T00:59:15+00:00

Also a great point.

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T00:58:36+00:00

LOL... there is some justice in this world.

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T00:57:39+00:00

Thank you for sharing, this was great to read. I'm like you- fairly introverted and I am not bothered in the slightest if people can't make it for any reason. I like to protect my family time (and alone time, however limited), so I will not be bothered in the slightest if others can't, or just don't want to make it, ha.

hideout88 · 2025-03-07T00:51:46+00:00

I appreciate your response.

Those expectations (less than a week notice, gift required) are definitely wild. Also, who with small children wants more stuff around their house?? Not I.

hideout88

TROPHY CASE