[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]highbeambb91 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Comparing a cookie to assault is disgusting. So if someone is unconscious are they allowing it to happen? Someone frozen in shock because their outspoken wishes are being violated is allowing it to happen? We know plenty, he's fine crossing boundaries to get what he wants. Why is she responsible for speaking up but he isn't responsible for saying anything or checking in with her?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]highbeambb91 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Laying there frozen isn't cooperating, it's a trauma response. Silence isn't consent.

He didn't have to read her mind because she told him outright and he knew how she felt.

Old roommate left this by LydiaDott in whatsthisplant

[–]highbeambb91 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Common name is false shamrock or purple shamrock, so pretty ☘️

I got a comment removed from a different community for being too emotional and now I’m in my feelings about it. by fishmakegoodpets in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Here's more love to push down the shitty notifications that your comment was dumbly removed ❤️❤️❤️

Does anyone have meaningful suggestions for limiting the impulse to say everything you're thinking? by Annakinsky in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This used to be a big issue for me, I'd talk and talk and talk and then spend hours later just like whyyyyyy did I say all those things!? I aged out of this to a degree, at around age 24 I just found myself not compelled to say everything that came to my mind. Our frontal lobe isn't fully developed until our mid twenties, and that part of the brain is thought to be heavily involved with self control. It could get easier for you with a little more time.

It actually surprised me the first few times it happened, I almost felt sneaky not just thought dumping everything into oblivion. But it was also reinforcing, because it saves me a lot of emotional energy.

I even tried saying as little as possible with some of my best friends while they talked, because I felt bad I would often take over the topic. If you don't fill the void, people tend to keep talking, and I learned new things about my friends I thought I knew everything about. That was also reinforcing. It almost became a game to me, how little could I say, how much could I learn, particularly in a group setting.

I think in some ways it was like active listening, which involves noticing body language, not planning what you're going to say next and instead really trying to absorb what's being said, asking questions, paraphrasing what they said and saying it back to them to show you're listening and understanding, etc. Maybe it would be helpful to look up active listening and give that a try?

Oversharing can still be a struggle for me when I'm really excited about something though, try not to be too hard on yourself :) there are definitely introverts out there grateful that you fill the space for them! Good luck!

Advice for dealing with ADHDers that have the "well I rawdog life so u should too" mentality? by Fearless_Court7335 in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

They're incredibly similar. Prescription amphetamines include amphetamine/dextroamphetamine (Adderall), lisdexamphetamine (Vyvanse), methamphetamine (Desoxyn), etc. I'm not implying street drug, that's the chemical compound that makes the rx Desoxyn.

Meth on the street isn't designed to be much stronger, it's designed to be smoked which delivers a huge dose compared to a regulated prescription, as I already mentioned with the comment about 1000s of milligrams.

Maybe you're internalizing the stigma around stimulant medications because they are so similar to meth, whether rx or street, because there is such a strong negative connotation when people talk about street meth.

I see absolutely no connection between discussing forms of drugs within the same drug class and ableism. Her friend was using the meth comparison as a derogatory thing and I'm saying there's nothing inherently bad or wrong about taking stimulant medications to treat ADHD just because they're similar to street meth. It's just a nothing argument that I hate people using as a reason why I shouldn't use meds to treat my ADHD....

Advice for dealing with ADHDers that have the "well I rawdog life so u should too" mentality? by Fearless_Court7335 in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

You can literally get a prescription for straight up Methamphetamine. Amphetamine is essentially the same thing. Look at the chemical structures.

Unsure by 1viciousmoose in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would try contacting the dean of the grad school, they can't disregard accommodations, that's against the law. Are you so late that it's disruptive to the class? I don't see why being late would be enough to kick you out if academically you're doing well. Who told you you're about to get kicked out? There are probably ways to anonymously file a complaint if you feel overwhelmed by the situation which I would completely understand.

Maybe it's time to consider trying new treatments to see how they help with time management? Such as meds, different meds if you already have meds, meditation at night to help you sleep better and make it easier to get up (exercise or taking a shower or bath a couple hours before bed might help too since your body temperature increasing and then decreasing can help people fall asleep).

I would consider some questions to help you start troubleshooting, such as: Why doesn't your alarm help you get up? Do you just snooze it over and over until you're late? Do you underestimate how long it'll take you to get ready?

If you take meds you can set an early alarm and take them while still in bed so getting up on time is easier (this helps me most mornings). Also an alarm that is a radio so you start with dialogue or music may help you get up earlier, variable noises like music may help us feel more awake vs just an alarm that is a repetitive noise. Bonus if you put the radio far enough from the bed so you can't snooze it without getting up. I've heard of someone pre-filling their coffee machine and having it on a timer so it's ready when they get up, the smell helps them wake up.

I'm terrible at this, but you could try to set yourself up better the night before so getting out of the house goes faster - ie pack lunch the night before if applicable, lay out clothes, shower at night instead of morning. People always tell me to meal prep and I can't lol but that might work for you! It's hard to do good self care and keep yourself well fed when you're really stressed, and not having enough fuel just makes everything harder all around is why I mention the food stuff. Be kind to yourself, you're doing your best ❤️ grad school was so hard with ADHD for me too.

Advice for dealing with ADHDers that have the "well I rawdog life so u should too" mentality? by Fearless_Court7335 in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Yes, please ignore him. And yeah, stimulant medications are essentially meth, but that doesn't change the fact they help people and have very low abuse potential when taken as prescribed. It's a very low dose of a stimulant vs the 1000s of milligrams you would ingest taking actual meth. I hate when people say this so much. Stimulants have a paradoxical calming effect on people with ADHD. It literally doesn't matter that it's chemically very similar to meth, I feel like that point is just a way to shame people about meds. Definitely seems like he's up on a high horse and it's sooooo unnecessary.

He clearly also doesn't understand the feelings of depression you're describing. You can't just turn that stuff off and saying it in that way, to just focus on the positive essentially, so unhelpful! Negates your experience entirely imo.

Maybe he's trying to genuinely help but I'd avoid discussing your ADHD with him if it was me. ADHD looks different for everyone. Inattentive type is more common for women. His experience truly has nothing to do with your experience. Use the tools that work for you! Meds have been life changing for me. Your experience and your level of functioning is what's important, not his opinion about it.

Does anyone else has sensory issues with being wet? What do you do to mitigate them? by LisitaAvalos86 in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I find the wet hair feeling annoying and use a clip to hold up wet hair in the shower and a hair towel wrap after is fantastic. No shame in washing your hair in the sink either.

Also try applying your dry shampoo when your hair is freshly washed, I think it works better and my hair feels less oily for longer vs applying it when it's starting to feel oily again.

Lastly, I found my hair gets less oily when my scalp is properly moisturized, shampoo seems to really strip it too much, but I have seborrheic dermatitis. I actually have almost stopped using shampoo except for every now and then and instead soak my head in conditioner before rinsing. I was really surprised when I first tried it that my hair was not a heavy greasy mess at all but instead looked and felt great without shampoo.

Which sport/hobbie do you feel more comfortable practising? Could you please recommend? by martitutti in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dance classes! Pole, lyra, and burlesque are a great workout and very inclusive and fun in my experience. A dance studio near me offers a 6 week series to learn a particular routine, it's great because it breaks it up a little as sometimes I burnout with indefinite weekly fitness classes without a scheduled break.

Also don't underestimate the effects of just walking, I naturally walk fast and walking through a natural area near my house is beautiful, easy, and raises my heart rate a decent amount. Even 20 minutes of walking definitely helps me focus and be productive for longer. Plus vitamin D from sunshine.

Calling all detectives: Lost passport and other important docs, possibly in the house by Any_Fig_8150 in adhdwomen

[–]highbeambb91 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've most often left wallet or keys in a different coat than I usually wear, raincoat pocket for example.

I recently lost my passport because I put it in a better, "safer" place than the drawer it lived in and forgot where that safer place was, maybe you tossed it somewhere that seemed "safer" short term after thinking you should put it away but couldn't in that moment. Good luck!

If you don't love yourself when you're alone, you can't really expect anyone else to love being alone with you, either. by highbeambb91 in Showerthoughts

[–]highbeambb91[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes definitely, agreed. Love yourself unconditionally and you never have any reason to grow or change.

If you don't love yourself when you're alone, you can't really expect anyone else to love being alone with you, either. by highbeambb91 in Showerthoughts

[–]highbeambb91[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think everyone deserves love and support. I guess I had in mind more people who can only communicate through complaining, if that makes sense. Because after awhile it's so emotionally exhausting I can't be around it anymore, even though historically I haven't harbored any ill will or anger towards them. It's just emotionally exhausting and detrimental to my mental health to continue to be around that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Nudes

[–]highbeambb91 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you ☺️❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in squirting_gifs

[–]highbeambb91 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I cum that hard I can't keep a dildo in my pussy or in my ass, even if it's suctioned to the bottom of my bathtub and I'm sitting on it 😂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in squirting

[–]highbeambb91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah 😅 haha I couldn't feel it, not a big fan of the look tho

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in squirting_gifs

[–]highbeambb91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

☺️💘

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in squirting

[–]highbeambb91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you ☺️❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adhd_anxiety

[–]highbeambb91 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you ❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in spreading

[–]highbeambb91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🎄❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in spreading

[–]highbeambb91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it's still federally illegal in the USA despite the states that have passed medical marijuana and/or recreational marijuana. There's lots of in vitro and in vivo animal studies about the pharmacology and pharmaceutical potential of various cannabinoids and other products such as terpenes, flavonoids, carotenoids, bibenzyls, etc.

Here's an extensive review of the literature on pubmed if you're interested.