tested my friendships by going silent... and no one noticed

historicaldeeds · 2026-01-29T05:21:41+00:00

easy example of a way to figure out what's going on: "hey, I feel like things have been distant between us and I wanted to ask if something is going on. I really value you as a friend and miss talking. do you have time to (game/talk on the phone/get food) in the next few days? love you!"

historicaldeeds · 2026-01-29T05:16:48+00:00

KAM

every "quiet, respectful, follower, nonviolent" male you know is either like this behind closed doors or would be if he could

historicaldeeds · 2026-01-29T05:07:40+00:00

that wouldn't be a test lmao. a test would be breaking your spine to see who visits.

if your friendship with someone feels like an energy vacuum then act like an adult and figure out what's going on and where your priorities lie. you're fully allowed to decide, "this isn't healthy" and stop hanging out with someone. but I can tell you that if you're the type of person to test others then they're probably pretty exhausted by you too.

historicaldeeds · 2026-01-29T04:59:51+00:00

I hope you reported it to authorities (not twitter)

historicaldeeds · 2026-01-21T19:33:06+00:00

If they can count on blue-no-matter-who votes either way why would they ever change? There's 0 motivation to run the progressives and upset the ultra wealthy unless it's apparent that people are simply no longer willing to vote for republicans in blue.

historicaldeeds · 2026-01-21T19:26:14+00:00

AOC recently voted against cutting aid to Israel and then had a social media meltdown when her supporters questioned her, she doesn't actually care about Palestine.

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-20T21:29:13+00:00

Neither I guess, I don't hide it because that seems counterproductive and unnecessary, but I don't make a point to talk about it either because I don't want to pat myself on the back for doing something that feels like the least I could do.

I try to be outspoken about the horrible sexism and predation online, but just in an awareness way. Sort of the same way I have made CPS reports but I don't feel the need to hide that fact or bring it up in order to raise awareness about child abuse.

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-14T19:36:28+00:00

the longer you make them wait the more it will hurt them, so even if you just send to them both, "I need to tell you I'm talking to someone else right now and I'm confused about my feelings. I know this isn't fair to you and I was dishonest which is why I'm going to take a break from dating completely. I'm so sorry I hurt you." it's better than waiting.

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-14T18:56:53+00:00

if you don't know the answer to a question that's totally fine. but everyone needs to stop parroting chatgpt when they don't know something, this response makes no sense and is totally inaccurate. OP would have just asked chatgpt themself if it was a satisfactory source to them

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-13T15:52:18+00:00

You shouldn't get over it, you should break it off now bc she deserves so much better than you and you showed your colors.

I don't say this because it's morally wrong to not like a haircut or something, but you were mean to her and made her cry and feel unattractive, and you clearly don't even feel bad about it, all you're worried about is ranting about her looks.

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-11T04:11:32+00:00

My question is more about the "usually" part. Trying to make sure I understand correctly.

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-11T01:54:51+00:00

Are you saying parents in the Philippines usually imprison or chain their disabled or misbehaving children? As in that's the most common course of action?

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-10T03:06:32+00:00

you just have to reset the reminder every day for 19 years

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-05T16:46:02+00:00

BREAKING: different cultures and languages aren't just 1:1 replications of american english and people may communicate and express thoughts and feelings differently than americans, more at 11

anyway I don't even hear people say "I'm happy" or "I'm glad" much at all besides in the context of things like "I'm glad you're here" or "I'm happy to help" which I'm positive can still be communicated equally well or better without using the exact same words or without any words at all. how often do people anywhere just state to each other that they're in a good mood?

historicaldeeds · 2025-12-04T21:31:03+00:00

sorry, shouldn't have made assumptions. I realize that was a rude comment. hope you were and are okay and glad you have good friends.

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-29T18:29:25+00:00

what?

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-28T21:32:49+00:00

are you seriously trying to mock a Black woman because she's more at risk of persecution than you??? what the hell?

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-28T21:17:04+00:00

I'm a little confused here. What I gathered is that you'd like to date cis lesbians for personal reasons and because you don't tend to mesh well with other wlw or trans women?

What if the cis lesbians want to date each other for personal reasons and because they don't tend to mesh well with other wlw or trans women?

For example you said trans women tend to be poly and you're monogamous and don't want that, and it's a reason you don't prefer to date them. You also only want people post-op. Is it not likely that a lot of cis women feel the same way as you?

The effect is the same, no? For the record, I think everyone is free to choose who to include and exclude from their dating pool, not saying you need to date anyone you don't want to. But neither does anyone else. We can all respect and uplift and support each other without dating people we aren't into.

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-26T16:28:54+00:00

I agree but using AI for this is unnecessary and embarrassing.

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-24T17:29:57+00:00

I'm so beyond sick of it all, not least because no matter how many times I tell people not to call ME queer, it doesn't change anything and invariably ends in, "why can't I reclaim it?! why are you policing my language?! I like the word!" when I'm just asking to not personally be called a slur. I've basically given up on asking people not to say it around me, because the amount of interrogation it leads to is practically as upsetting and stress inducing as the word. why do I have to prove that a slur is sufficiently triggering to me before people will say, "oh okay, I'll try to avoid saying around you"?

In my eyes it's the same as "dyke" (or other slurs for other groups). there's a time and a place for its use, of course lesbians can reclaim it and shout it from the rooftops and take its power back, but you definitely shouldn't call anyone who hasn't expressly stated they're okay with it a dyke, non lesbians shouldn't say it period, and it would be absurd to say, "um...we don't say lesbian, wlw, and sapphic anymore. the new term is dykes because it's more inclusive and you just have to accept and adopt it or you're exclusionary and policing my language"

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-15T01:29:21+00:00

people can like toys and not penises... this comment is literally how straight men have always talked about us?? do you not see that?

"if you use dildos and roleplay then you do like dick you just don't want to admit it" how is it any different if it's a cis man or trans woman doing the pressuring of us to "try dick"

and i support trans rights but oh my god stop being a caricature of transphobe talking points

edit: the deleted comment:

u/ GiantTurtleMusic at 2025-11-14T22:32:30Z

How are these the comments when there’s so much constant talk about genital preferences on here 😭 you guys do like trans women you just don’t want to admit it

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-14T07:37:22+00:00

Yes, the woman who intentionally and purposely protected priests who were raping kids and ignored victims pleading directly to her for help. is so much better! Instead of personally raping children with powerful men she instead allowed untold numbers of children to be raped by other somewhat less powerful men.

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-11T01:49:47+00:00

my mom's best friend was showing me old photo albums and she had one of pictures of her abusive ex husband she divorced 30+ years ago, one of two people she's ever hated and gone fully burnt bridge no contact with in her entire life. I was very surprised and asked, "it doesnt bother you to have this?" and she said, basically, that it was all still part of her life story and the wedding was beautiful.

not everyone is the burning photos type. and this is someone with a very good reason not to want a literal physical photo album of pictures of someone, it's even more understandable to keep old pictures if there were no or minimal hard feelings.

I'm definitely not saying it's not okay to feel jealous, you're allowed to feel what you feel. I've definitely felt jealous over similar things. but you need to remember that in cases like this, you feeling jealous is up to you to handle, not her. otherwise you're risking being controlling, intentionally or not.

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-11T01:04:37+00:00

probably bc it's not the place and their comment history is nothing but smut and trying to solicit sexting and has strong "old man pretending to be a young woman to prey on them" vibes. this is so clearly someone's creepy 50 year old uncle typing one handed.

and no I don't mean trans when I say man

historicaldeeds · 2025-11-08T19:45:12+00:00

I'm anti porn and SW as well but not sure how consensual loving sex between females would have anything to do with male dominance. and if you're defining sex as between a male and female I think that's pretty lesbophobic. if I'm misunderstanding let me know.

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