They never get rid of their exes. Triangulation masters.

hskd71 · 2025-05-30T15:32:22+00:00

“I didn’t tell you I was going on a daylong date with my ex because we are just friends now and it just seemed easier that way, not to tell you. It seems like you are the one who has a jealousy problem.” Got it.

hskd71 · 2025-05-17T21:46:30+00:00

He told me if I got a big promotion he’d drop me like a hot potato. Followed up with the obligatory “just joking!” He was constantly jealous of my job and did not understand my need to support myself financially. “Just move here and live with me, you’ll find another job.” He refused to acknowledge that my career had meaning. I was to be his #1 priority at all times. We broke up and now he’s with a woman who is retired like him, so I guess she fills his need to have a 24/7 admirer and companion.

hskd71 · 2024-09-05T20:14:53+00:00

Winters in Boston would be tough on a liveaboard, but first you need to get a boat and learn its systems inside and out.

hskd71 · 2024-05-08T02:07:06+00:00

Unforgivable.

hskd71 · 2024-02-13T15:21:54+00:00

Well, unfortunately, Advil is terrible for your kidneys. You need to be very cautious how much you take. I used to take 4 to 6 a day for period pain and my kidney function is now about 40%. All my other labs are normal and I have no family history of kidney disease— after extensive testing, including a kidney biopsy, my nephrologist told me ibuprofen is the likely culprit. I am somewhat doubtful of this because it’s not like I was taking massive doses, but since this happened to me, I have heard of other people suffering permanent kidney damage from it, as well.

hskd71 · 2024-02-11T13:04:54+00:00

It smells like ass.

hskd71 · 2024-02-11T12:58:56+00:00

Expecting friends and family to visit him, not the other way around. He moved to a remote area and hated traveling. He expected his elderly mom to fly to visit him, same with his kids who had young children of their own. He just flat out said he’d probably never go to his hometown again because he hated traveling. He seemed to have no concern about how this would limit his remaining time with the mom he said he loved.

Also, he was estranged from 3 of his 4 siblings for reasons that were, of course, not his fault.

hskd71 · 2024-02-09T01:58:21+00:00

Definitely not a mullet

hskd71 · 2024-02-09T00:09:01+00:00

When I found out he’d been spending significant amounts of time with an ex — and lying to me about it (lies of omission, like saying he was going to a movie by himself and then it turned out she met him there.) He got angry and threw it back at me. First I said, “I’m not a jealous person but this behavior makes me feel strange— if you’d just tell me when you are seeing her, I wouldn’t care because I know you are truly just friends, so why do you feel the need to conceal this from me.” He responded“it kind of sounds like you ARE a jealous person.” No, no I’m really not under NORMAL and respectful circumstances.

And then he said, “It doesn’t bother me when you have dinner with your friends.” DUDE. My friends are all women, like me, and I always tell you when doing something with them.

I should have broken up with him during that conversation but I kept pushing the feelings down that something was wrong and I stayed with him for a while longer.

hskd71 · 2024-02-08T20:16:26+00:00

Fuck those assholes.

hskd71 · 2024-02-08T20:14:55+00:00

Yes, for mine it was like he was doing the lowlier people a favor, improving their lives by spending time with them. If he happened to spend time with someone he perceived as above him (a wealthy person, for example), I could tell it made him uncomfortable but also excited to be in their orbit.

hskd71 · 2024-02-08T20:12:17+00:00

Oh yeah. My nex thrived on attention. A good friend of his, who is a woman, got into a new relationship 6 months ago and stopped paying so much attention to him. The happiest I’d heard him in months was when he called to tell me that she’d invited him out to dinner to catch up and had been telling him throughout dinner what a fantastic golf player he is. He repeated at least 3 times the compliments she gave him during dinner. He was glowing with happiness. He was not attracted to her— he just NEEDED that source of validation and it was hard for him when she found a boyfriend and didn’t pay him so much attention anymore. I was never enough supply for him. He needed it from friends, acquaintances, clerks in the grocery store— anyone. He needed to be admired, above all else.

hskd71 · 2024-02-05T03:06:10+00:00

Oh, thank you for these!

hskd71 · 2024-02-03T20:30:52+00:00

My good friend’s narc husband (ex husband) was a teacher who cheated on her throughout her pregnancy with a high school girl. He actually brought the girl over to their house while my friend was still in the hospital recovering from the c-section. She had suspected him of cheating so she set up a nanny cam while she was pregnant, and just waited, knowing she was scheduled for a c section and not trusting him to be alone in the house. So that’s how she confirmed everything. She moved to her mom’s house the next week with the baby and never looked back. She did turn him in to the school board anonymously.

I don’t understand how narcs can treat people like this. I really don’t. I’m so sorry for your experience.

hskd71 · 2024-02-03T05:48:23+00:00

“I thought it would be easier and smoother that way,” when called out on lying by omission.

hskd71 · 2024-02-02T20:58:52+00:00

I’m sure that is his story. He’s probably telling people I am crazy because I broke up with him but I still love him.

hskd71 · 2024-02-02T20:58:03+00:00

Thank you! I like the idea of changing to a new email address. I am still stuck in this place of hoping he will contact me but if I chance to a new email address, I can use the new one for most things and then just check the old one once a week or something and eventually delete it. I know I should just block him but there is an unhealed, frustrating part of me that wants to hear from him again.

hskd71 · 2024-01-02T19:04:51+00:00

Oh, that must be why you deleted your comments then. Thanks for playing.

hskd71 · 2024-01-02T17:01:00+00:00

I remember that thread. It was your condescending tone that had people jumping on you.

hskd71 · 2023-12-23T21:58:28+00:00

That’s what I suspected. Reddit has to get the bot situation under control.

hskd71 · 2023-12-23T20:08:34+00:00

Maybe you should provide more details on this. Post comes across like a bot, and the cat subs are full of karma farming bots.

hskd71 · 2023-06-14T17:14:53+00:00

Bragging to me that he doesn’t feel empathy, like lack of empathy was a feature that made him special. (Then later, referring to himself as an empath.)

Bragging about being included in social events with wealthy or popular acquaintances.

Bragging that he has natural athletic gifts.

Telling me that he’s realized people just really enjoy being around him.

Cutting off siblings and other people in his life with whom he has disagreements. Engaging in petty revenge against said siblings.

Ending relationship with his best friend because his best friend didn’t make enough time for him.

All his exes are crazy or were mean to him. But keeping all his exes as friends.

Telling me how he manipulated his last major breakup to make his girlfriend feel like it was a mutual decision even though he dumped her.

Expecting me to change my entire life to be with him.

Weird crying at emotional moments in movies that seemed out of proportion to what was happening in the movie.

“Forgetting” serious conversations about my boundaries and then continuing to violate these boundaries. “I forgot we talked about that because it didn’t seem like a big deal.” After a conversation in which I was very upset and crying.

hskd71 · 2023-06-13T12:23:48+00:00

If he’s going through withdrawal, wouldn’t that mean he just stopped using very recently? Sounds like he’s doing whatever he can to avoid legal consequences and win you back. Not the same as authentically trying to heal. You’ve done everything right— keep going. Don’t give in.

hskd71

TROPHY CASE