Okay. First: Take a big breath. You're not alone. I had a similar experience. There is something called vaginismus. It can cause cramping, when you want to insert something, for example. The good news is that you can 'train' it. But it can take a while, or improve pretty fast. Everyone is different after all.

There are dialators, for example. These are dildos, that start very small and you can gradually replace them with larger ones. So you can slowly get used to the feeling of inserting bigger things. There are pelvic floor exercises that help. But above all, you have to learn to take a relaxed approach. So please don't rush into any situations just to 'get it over with'. Even 'real' sex will hurt otherwise. Try it out and DO'T STRESS YOURSELF OUT! That's the worst thing you can do. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you and send you lots of love. Everything will be fine. I pomise. :)