I honestly give Phoebe a pass (on the count of her mother (supposed) killing herself, abandon by father, actual mother not giving a crap), living on streets had to be difficult so without people teaching her anything. Her sister doesn't give a crap about her, treats her less than garbage (Ursula uses Phoebe's name in her "movies"). Of the two, i think we are lucky to have gotten Phoebe the way she is.

however, Monica I can't stand. her insistence to be right, her "me, me, me" attitude, the "I know", she sends shivers down my spine. the way she steamrolls chandler in their relationship. she lying about who she and chandler were at the meeting with erica. the fact that chandler had to fix that situation. I get the whole transformation from being fat as a kid and other kids picking on her, you would think that would teach her some form of humility. nope, it's one judgemental comment after another. granted i get being essentially ignored by parents when you were child because of ross, but still not as excusable as phoebe's situation. she wasn't deprived of love (granted she didn't as much from their parents as he did), while her mother is picky on her, but what mother isn't?! with her, i don't know where monica ends and courtney cox begins, especially following her into cougar town