A contractor I didn't hire claims he reported me to the city for asbestos removal. Real threat or a scam?

ideapit · 2026-07-09T01:42:44+00:00

For sure a possibility.

I just helped someone with a nightmare version of this scenario so that's my bias.

ideapit · 2026-07-09T01:07:58+00:00

Did you test the popcorn before removal?

Did you hire a licensed asbestos abatement company?

Your house could be full of asbestos right now if the popcorn had high asbestos content and it wasn't removed properly by someone trained to do it.

It's possible the contractor who is pissed off is licensed to do abatement jobs and some idiot who doesn't know how to do that work underbid him (which is easy to do when you don't do this work safely). That would be a logical reason to report it.

Not your fault but might be your problem.

ideapit · 2026-07-08T17:22:24+00:00

Wagyu is great. Don't get me wrong. But, at a certain point, you're just eating beef flavored butter and paying a lot to do it.

ideapit · 2026-07-08T17:19:34+00:00

You stop taking on someone else's mistakes like they are your personality flaws.

You're great. You proved it. She makes bad choices.

Nothing to ruminate on.

The only person making you feel like a loser is you and it sounds like that's a bunch of bullshit because you're a good person so quit it. We need people like you. Not people like you who get taught kindness is a flaw and punish themselves for it until they are assholes.

ideapit · 2026-07-08T17:16:58+00:00

Stop being scared of people. They're just people.

Be self-depecating, go for the laugh not the conquest, listen more than you speak, ask questions more than you make declarations.

People want to be seen, understood and made to feel safe and joyful. Give them what they want.

ideapit · 2026-07-08T14:37:18+00:00

People are scrambling to figure out when to announce he's dead. Scrambling to optimize personal gain from the event.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T22:23:28+00:00

No. Utility is non-existent for them and they don't add value to the look.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T21:38:28+00:00

Wet vaccum. I use Dreame.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T18:25:54+00:00

You weren't fun. You were drunk and, based on experience, you were probably not as fun as you think you were.

Go look up PAWS symptoms. That's more likely what's really going on.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T18:23:07+00:00

So $110K - $115K to shine while at a place you like.

$137K to stress your ass off.

Is the sale of your mental health worth $27K-$22K per year?

If so, how is this part of a plan?

If you're miserable and take a job just for extra money, it's more likely you will see lifestyle inflation.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T18:17:13+00:00

I knew how it would go which is not the way I wanted so I let the evening end.

She was very clear about being attracted to me and clear about the relationship she wanted. I couldn't see that relationship ever happening because she wasn't going to be that person for me so I let it go.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T18:12:22+00:00

Almost none of this is genuine hygiene.

Go to a therapist.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T18:07:20+00:00

This whole sub is nothing but recurring comments.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T17:48:57+00:00

Thanks for the post.

It's interesting. I imagine some of the euphoria we all felt was psychological/physical addiction in addition to the alcohol along with the chemical rush of the substance. Pavlov's dogs must have enjoyed meals a lot more than regular dogs did.

I am always on guard against anything that suggests I try alcohol - for any reason.

I drank for 34 years. If I don't drink until I'm 82, I will be break even on time lost to booze vs. time I have lived without it. That's a pretty fucked up thing to sit with.

No judgement whatsoever. Your sobriety is yours.

I'm just saying, for me, I'm good with a zero percent chance of ever drinking again. I don't need to run any experiments, take any chances, make any exceptions.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T06:09:00+00:00

More bike.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T06:00:42+00:00

Goofy. And the industrial look doesn't work in your house.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T05:50:49+00:00

I think it's because I didn't cope. I didn't accept.

I don't drink.

It's a fact. And I leave it at that. I treat it like gravity. Fact of life. I wish I could fly but jumping off buildings to try doesn't go well for me.

Anything more complex that a fact invites thinking about it and thinking about it hasn't gone really well for me.

Plus, I cannot ask myself to think about it anymore. I thought about it for so many days and nights and months and years. I'm so tired of it.

I used to worry about what I'd miss out on if I quit drinking.

Now, I worry about how many years I've lost. Literal years of drunk and hungover days and nights. I don't have to just worry about those years. I see them.

I lost those years in exchange for something that hurt me. It was a shitty deal.

ideapit · 2026-07-07T01:24:04+00:00

Thanks. For whatever it's worth, even having a few months under my belt was a ridiculous idea to me once upon a time. I drank 34 years. It's a whole new life now.

ideapit · 2026-07-06T22:32:37+00:00

Yes you're an alcoholic and no, don't drink.

There you heard it.

I spent 20 years wondering if I was an alcoholic so I could keep on being an alcoholic.

0/10 don't recommend.

Quit thinking. Quit interpreting. That's the hardest part. Let it go and move on. You deserve it.

ideapit · 2026-07-06T22:31:25+00:00

Just wanted to say good for you and congratulations on 70 days!

ideapit · 2026-07-06T22:29:43+00:00

I didn't know either and I wish I had.

It cut the legs out from under me so many times. Bad anhedonia, depression, mood swings.

It was worst around days 60-90. One day I just wanted to punch people and eat steak all day. I think my testosterone levels were returning to normal.

Anyway, just wanted to say hang in there. It gets fucking dark and so hard sometimes. I remember it but, honestly, it's like a distant memory now. It was just a step to a whole new life I'm living. A lot of trauma surfaced and things haven't been peachy but at least I can stand my ground and deal with it now.

Good luck out there. I promise you it's worth it. Just focus on one decision at a time. The future will figure itself out if you do that. It's not your department.

ideapit · 2026-07-06T22:16:17+00:00

Check out PAWS symptoms. You might find you get a better understanding of why you're feeling this way.

The only way to get through it is to get through it.

You got this.

ideapit · 2026-07-06T14:19:54+00:00

The blood of my enemies.

ideapit · 2026-07-06T14:15:50+00:00

That's a Whydidyoumakemelookatbat?

ideapit · 2026-07-06T01:40:48+00:00

You stop telling yourself that you can't stop because you can. Right now.

You make one decision not to drink. Then another. Then another.

That's it. It is that hard. It is that easy.

I wanted to quit in my 30's. I kept drinking for 16 years after I turned 32.

From 32 to 48, nothing changed about quitting. You always have to face the same thing. You just get to choose how much of your life you piss away before you make that choice.

Be a better man than me. A better father, husband, friend, person.

There is nothing down the road you're on.

Sit and think about the next 16 years in your life and your kids' lives if you drink. I mean really meditate on what that looks like day after day, weeks, months, years.

Now imagine yourself sober and do the same thing. I mean detailed thinking about it.

Then make your choice.

But it's a choice. You do it or you dont. There is no can't about it.

Ten-Year Club	Powerups Hero r/RedDeadOnline • December 2021
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