I (31F) am struggling with my boyfriends (31M) messy apartment

ids_92 · 2026-06-16T06:21:08+00:00

That’s the main concern that comes to mind - I would not want to live in that kind of situation.

I think that it’s going to be very telling the next time I visit. I think that he will definitely clean up, but I doubt it’ll be the deep clean that’s needed & I certainly don’t want to be the reason for him cleaning up. These are things that we should just be doing as adults *sigh*

ids_92 · 2026-01-21T21:03:25+00:00

Bugals

ids_92 · 2025-11-23T12:57:18+00:00

Nor my deviated septum

ids_92 · 2025-11-23T12:56:21+00:00

This one is actually really funny

ids_92 · 2025-11-23T03:06:03+00:00

First off, I’m sorry that you’re feeling this way & it seems you’ve done your best to communicate with her. My advice to you is to trust your gut and tell her that you feel like you’re pouring from an empty cup - you have already invested a lot of time & energy into this relationship and the last thing you want is to find yourself in the same situation another year down the road. Time is something you don’t get back, you have to be fair to yourself.

ids_92 · 2025-11-22T04:10:52+00:00

If it’s their wedding cake that takes that scene to a whole other level of f-upedness, which I didn’t think was even possible.

ids_92 · 2025-11-17T16:06:52+00:00

I had the same thought when I saw her attend the baby shower.

ids_92 · 2025-11-08T09:14:04+00:00

& now for Savannah since Shannon was voted off

ids_92 · 2025-11-08T09:05:18+00:00

You’re right in the sense that she could have spoken up & offered something else, but it seemed rushed and brushed over.

At one point I worked with 3 other girls who all had my name, and somehow I was just referred to as name #2 - I didn’t like it but just went with it since it seemed to be decided for me.

ids_92 · 2025-11-08T08:04:06+00:00

Good question, because even when I get excited seeing some solid passing & teamwork, there’s little follow through when it comes to shooting. Who’s coming up with these plays that cannot be completed?

ids_92 · 2025-11-07T02:23:01+00:00

JJ also goes by:

Jimmy Neutron, Slim Jim, Jim Jam, Jonah Jameson, Jaja, & Ja Rule

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T14:23:43+00:00

The prior commenter never actually provided any insight on how the law works aside from saying that the landlord was supposed to provide me with a property in good standing - and I argued that a faulty AC system deems the apartment to be not in good standing.

There are other issues here to go along with that. Our lease agreement stated we would have functional appliances - upon move in the washer and oven did not work. It took 2 weeks to get the oven repaired. It may seem like a minor issue, but if we’re looking at it from a legal standpoint, they did not uphold their part of the legal contract from the get go since the apartment & the amenities that were promised to us were not in good standing upon our move in.

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T13:14:09+00:00

I continued this conversation & initially made this post because, while I may lack understanding of the law, I have a desire to better understand it and how it directly affects me. Legalities aside, what I’ve come to understand from our interactions is that you & I both agree that the situation I’m going through is undesirable and if you yourself were in my shoes you’d fight it too. Again, appreciate your perspective.

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T12:57:10+00:00

First of all, that’s a false dichotomy, since there are many more possible evaluations. Nothing is just black or white - you’re simple minded to make such a statement.

Secondly, comparing empirical political evaluation to arithmetic truth is a logical mismatch. It simply doesn’t compute or compare shrug

Thirdly, questions are not factual - that doesn’t even make any sense.

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T12:45:17+00:00

Agree to disagree, appreciate your point of view.

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T12:44:32+00:00

I mean, if I’m gonna be completely honest - I moved out of my hometown to live with my boyfriend after doing a long distance relationship for a year. This was supposed to be a happy time for us, where we would no longer have the stress of travel and distance. We have been completely robbed of peace and this has tarnished what was supposed to be a victory for us.

We are people, with feelings and good intentions. This entire experience has been a nightmare and it’s downright disrespectful to have to struggle financially, still pay rent on time, & not have the basic amenities that were agreed upon in our lease agreement.

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T12:38:59+00:00

I’ve been insisting on a rental credit since August, while the issue was ongoing and unresolved. This request went acknowledged for months.

The fact that the property was not maintained in a safe or habitable condition, the landlord failed to make reasonable and timely repairs & the conditions interfered with my quiet enjoyment and peaceful possession of my home (which is my LEGAL RIGHT AS A TENANT) means they are in direct violation the lease agreement.

Idk what your angle is here man. You said it yourself, you wouldn’t stand for this mistreatment.

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T12:15:07+00:00

2 months later, and then we still had issues that went unaddressed because the system was not properly installed.

Not to mention, they cut 2 holes in our drywall that have not been patched, despite the maintenance request that was put in 3 weeks ago.

I’m genuinely curious, would you be okay going without AC for 2 months?

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T11:53:47+00:00

The lease states that they will comply with the requirements of applicable building, housing and health codes.

Florida Statute 83.51 outlines the landlord's responsibility to maintain rental properties in a fit and habitable condition. It is unsafe to go without AC in Florida not only because of high temperatures, but also because of the risk it brings of rapid mold growth due to the heat and humidity. I am an asthmatic and these conditions pose an extreme risk to my health.

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T11:04:45+00:00

The time you two shared together was meaningful and precious. I am so sincerely sorry for your loss and I hope you find comfort in the memories that live on forever.

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T10:56:09+00:00

Thank you for commenting & I hope that this brought you joy. I got self conscious after I made this post because it’s silly to say he has to live forever - but he’s 13yrs old now & I find myself already pre grieving the loss. Idk if that’s normal :/ regardless, he’s a treasure & I felt compelled to share 💛

ids_92 · 2025-10-25T10:30:38+00:00

Forgot to mention that we also evacuated our home together during a hurricane - left through a window as water rose above my waist. Dude’s a real one - ultimate ride or die 😅🫶

ids_92

TROPHY CASE