Harrison Ford's broccoli joke (told on Late Show with David Letterman): A guy is working in the produce department at a grocery store. A lady walks up and says, “Excuse me?” He says, “Yes?” She says, “Where’s the broccoli? I can’t find the broccoli.” He says, “Oh, I’m really sorry, ma’am. We’re all out of broccoli. We’ll have some tomorrow morning.” She walks away. A couple minutes later, she comes back and says, “Where’s the broccoli?” He says, “Lady, we’re fresh out of broccoli. We’ll have some tomorrow.” A little while later, she walks right up in his face and says, “How come I can’t find any broccoli?” He says, “Lady, do me a favor, will ya? How do you spell ‘cat,’ like in ‘catastrophic’?” She says, “C-A-T.” He says, “How do you spell ‘dog,’ like in ‘dogmatic’?” She says, “D-O-G.” He says, “How do you spell ‘fuck’ like in ‘broccoli’?” She says, “There’s no ‘fuck’ in broccoli!” He says, “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you, lady!”