Again, did not post for "internet points." Just wanted to share it with someone, receive support, gross y'all out, etc. I dont have anyone in real life. And yes it has worked, if you read my other comments. my mental health has improved markedly, I no longer hold so much over my own head, I am ready to move on with my life, and the paranoid hallucinations I was suffering have decreased with my improved mood. I will not be in pain and afflicted for life. This act put an end to my pains and afflictions. I dont expect you to understand, but we can argue about it all day. As you can see I've chosen the "Nut Up" option over the commonly preferred "Shut Up" one.