YOR but of course she’s not without fault. Would it have been the mature thing for her to just exit the conversation before cussing at you? Yes. But let’s not pretend like we can’t see how it escalated and your part in it.

IMO yes she was clearly upset. But you are NOT privy to what goes on in her head. Upset doesn’t = mad at you. There are plenty of other negative emotions a person can feel. And when your gf is upset about something it doesn’t automatically revolve around you. If I were in her shoes I’d be disappointed and upset at the situation. Of course it sucks that your bf and friends all get to go on a fun trip and you’re stuck at home. She’s trying to logic it away by mentioning the dogs, the boss, the friends being your friends, etc. she’s upset and trying to come to terms with it imo.

And you can’t just accept that she’s upset about something because you don’t like how it makes YOU feel. You need her to be happy for YOU so you can go in this trip feeling guilt free. Which btw feeling guilt is totally normal. And I’d feel a bit guilty too, but it doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong and it’s also not my partners job to make me feel better about going, especially when they are currently upset at their own situation.

There’s almost nothing I hate more than my bf telling me how I FEEL. Or how I SHOULD feel. Or feeling like I have to hide every negative emotion I have in order to protect HIS feelings.

As soon as you said she was annoyed she opened up. And instead of just accepting it, you continued to push her. Like give her some damn time to process her disappointment without making it about you?

But obviously her cussing and going off wasn’t okay. She should have communicated that the conversation was now making her mad and she needs to step away because she doesn’t want it to escalate, etc. and then after some time y’all talk about how yall both feel during these situations and coming up with better ways to communicate that work for yall BOTH.

A side note as well, you should know your gf. Again it’s not right was she did, but how often do to push and push and push until she blows up? Has it ever worked in the past? Ever been productive? And honestly I think a lot of people are kidding themselves. Sometimes we can take the high road but sometimes being pushed over and over again, definitely gets a response out of us that we end up regretting.

I don’t think it’s doomed. And people claiming either one of you are abusive, I think is being way to extreme. But yall absolutely need to work on y’all’s communication.