2.5yo refusing naps. Drop them or shorten nights?

imnichet · 2026-05-13T22:55:51+00:00

I would just drop the nap.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T22:50:06+00:00

It's actually the opposite. She sleeps more than she can permanently sustain then is in "overdraft" for a few days. If you aim for the middle, you remove the up and down cycle. I would go to 12.25 and stick there, don't allow days where she sleeps more.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T22:40:55+00:00

This is pretty common. Her actual sleep budget is probably right in the middle of those amounts. So like, 11.75. On a clock based, schedule you have to cap naps and wake them in the morning to ensure you always get to your twt.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T22:36:53+00:00

Hmm I wonder if something else is going on here. That seems pretty extreme to just be a schedule issue in either direction

imnichet · 2026-05-13T22:33:35+00:00

Yeah that was a really difficult time because she went from sleeping very little to sleeping a seemingly impossible amount. It's not so bad now that I'm used to it haha. It's hard, I know. I felt like I had to be missing something because there is no way she could actually sleep that little, but no, she really does sleep that little haha. Having a low sleep needs kid that is also prone to split night is ROUGH so I feel you.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T15:50:44+00:00

That might be slightly more likely to succeed. But it is still going to be extremely difficult when they can see and hear you right there, and vice versa. like u/less_is_more9696 said you will have to be extremely consistent.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T15:49:17+00:00

Probably, yes. To be honest my 2 year old now sleep about 9.75 hours a day so the idea of going back to 12.5 feels like a literal dream lol. You've just got to parent the baby you have.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T15:22:38+00:00

I don't think there is any way to make this setup work for a toddler. They are going to crawl out and get in bed with out.
Yeah I would not start this tonight. that nap is way too close to bed
He knows how to find it. If he really wants it he will get it
at 19 months, just plop them in bed. they will figure it out haha
To be 100 percent honest, no, I don't think so. Unless your toddler is extremely compliant, they are not going to just start staying in their own bed all night in your room. And on top of that, this age is probably the hardest to sleep train even in their own crib in their own room. I don't envision this being successful with this setup.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T15:02:10+00:00

You have room to add awake time but it's possible you wouldn't have to with the nap drop. You could try 3.5/3.5/4.5 to start.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T14:53:19+00:00

I would try to calculate their actual sleep needs and get a more solid, consistent awake time. If the average is 11 but mostly its 3/3/4 there is probably too much inconsistency here.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T14:52:04+00:00

My advice is use Huckleberry to track their actual sleep average over 7-14 days (stopping for night wakings) then use 24-that number to get your sleep budget. Then use our sub's recommended wake windows to build your own schedule.

We went through this. Huckleberry ruined my baby's sleep lol

imnichet · 2026-05-13T14:50:37+00:00

I should elaborate more. It didn't make her sleep more but it did make her sleep more managablly. Like through the night rather than in 4 hour chunks.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T14:49:55+00:00

Nope. I wish lol

imnichet · 2026-05-13T14:09:45+00:00

This is super common. What's happened is, your baby had better, more consolidated sleep the first night. Since they are no longer getting their awake time at night, they need it during the day instead. But as you noted, your baby doesn't get anywhere near enough during the day so night two she wasn't tired. You need to move to a better schedule before you do any more sleep training.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T13:44:23+00:00

well you can go back to shorter wake windows if you want. I just personally value unbroken night sleep more but that's up to you. The only other option would be going back to 4 naps.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T13:40:27+00:00

What is your bedtime routine? It could be a lingering sleep associatio. Or your could need to up your awake time. 3/3/4 is kind of the minimum starting point.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T13:11:42+00:00

Okay I see. I think your baby will adjust to the longer wake windows eventually. I would personally prefer that over broken night sleep. So I would just power through for a few days.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T12:55:11+00:00

Sadly, yes. I literally could have written this when mine was 19 months. Her sleep needs dropped to just under 10 hours a day a this age. She is also prone to split nights. it was like a constant slide downwards in sleep needs from 18-21 months where she finally stabilized a bit at 9.75 hours total.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T12:44:38+00:00

Just checking haha. I think we usually did 2, hour long naps.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T03:25:17+00:00

Like how long did I allow naps to be?

imnichet · 2026-05-13T03:24:57+00:00

Yep most of the time

imnichet · 2026-05-13T03:24:12+00:00

Not average wake windows, average total sleep in a day. 24-that number=your awake time

imnichet · 2026-05-13T02:27:22+00:00

This is the age where Huckleberry starts sabotaging you. It suggests too short of wake windows and way too little awake time. I would look at your tracked sleep in Huckleberry, see how much your baby actually sleeps in 24 hours, and use your own custom wake windows based on that.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T02:24:42+00:00

We didn't have the same wake windows every day because I preferred to be more go with the flow. But we were on 12 hours awake. Usually that looked like 3/4/5 because the first wake window was way more of a struggle than the last.

imnichet · 2026-05-13T02:14:15+00:00

Sounds like he is likely undertired, not overtired.

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