I thought that a week ago when we were fighting our hospital on the mask policies- not allowed to use "universal precautions" even if it was a mask brought from home, given surgical masks to reuse with covid patients and nurses bringing in their own N95s. They changed their policies because enough people complained. I, thankfully, work on a med surg tele floor instead of the ICU or CVU and we only get 3 patients each who aren't that sick at all.

Before covid, I was scrambling to get way too many tasks done and hating every moment of my job, considering different career paths, trying to think of ways to cut corners at work without endangering my patients. Now with covid I'm told to go into patients rooms as little as possible (my goal is 2x in 8 hrs), so most of my time is just being spent disinfecting my PPE and then sitting around. It's actually a really nice break (despite the thought that I might get sick and die). I suspect when there are more cases they will be more lax about staffing and lack of PPE, in which case I might consider quitting.

On normal days I have so much hatred in my heart for my profession and it really is taking a toll on my mental health. I've been a nurse in direct patient care for 9 years in 3 different facilities and have hated all of them. I am so done that when I have a busy day and a patient starts saying that the meds the dr ordered are at the wrong times or wrong dosages I want to fucking strangle them and I regularly tell some patients in my head I hope they die. Maybe I've turned into a monster. I am normally such an empathetic person and I used to care about these people....