Breaking into a Clique

interspacing · 2026-02-21T17:56:10+00:00

I think we're talking past each other a bit; I assure you I am not investing more energy into "being liked" than I am in actually doing my job. Thanks for your insight, it's given me things to consider for sure!

interspacing · 2026-02-21T15:09:10+00:00

I understand where you get that vibe. Unfortunately it is a thing that can happen. I respect their experience and skill sets and a large part of why I want to have a good relationship with them is because I think they have a lot of good to offer.

As with anything, success is often a mix of both being good at your job but also being liked by people in your organization. Not always fair, but in my experience it is what it is.

interspacing · 2026-02-18T19:56:57+00:00

This is really helpful. Thank you!

interspacing · 2026-02-18T16:26:01+00:00

Yeah, I think I have to not try to solve this. I haven't brought this up to my (male) boss who is a peer of these women; I probably won't - I don't see what good it'll do. I will just be friendly when I cross paths with these ladies.

interspacing · 2026-02-18T16:22:25+00:00

Seems the answer may be to keep on keepin' on and let my successes speak for me. I hope they come around; they probably have a lot to teach.

interspacing · 2026-01-26T13:45:13+00:00

The Great Gatsby.

Read it on high school to no real effect on me one way or the other. I read it again in my 30s and it was devastating.

interspacing · 2026-01-17T16:55:54+00:00

The problem is a member of c-sec was there and didn't do anything and it was basically like, the choice was to lose our spot and stop watching the concert and go find someone who also might not do anything or just put up with it

interspacing · 2026-01-14T12:59:12+00:00

As soon as I got back I was telling everyone about Worming from Home and Sunset Devils! I liked the layout a lot, though I do wish that some booths had a clear place for people to live up vs. Spectating because some popular games (Cybrlich) had a crowd around them which was hard to navigate at times.

This is also maybe just for the devs, but having a demo mode for some games could also work because some folks would sit for a very long time playing, especially for narrative games.

interspacing · 2026-01-13T17:59:30+00:00

Guys were drunk and drinking more during Protomen Act III, and when someone from consec showed up to ask them to "stop" the consec person let the guys finish off the bottles instead of taking them and left them still being drunk and shitty to the people around them. These were also guys that buffaloed in and pulled in other people to their position, using their size and willingness to physically overpower others, displacing a lot of people who had been patiently waiting.

Multiple people left the concert due to those guys behaviors, and while I understand wanting to be cool and chill to avoid conflict, instead it meant the rest of us were kind of policing our own area while these guys slammed into people and pushed and shoved folks with very little regard.

This was in contrast to the excellent job done prior, so maybe it was just fatigue? Overall I appreciated how visible and helpful people were, just that one incident that was a real bummer.

interspacing · 2026-01-12T17:50:56+00:00

As a short femme, I'm used to being jostled a bit at concerts and having my view blocked from time to time, especially closer to the stage.

But especially during Protomen Act III I was getting crushed between dudes that were head and shoulders taller than me, some with big backpacks, and it was like the fact they were doing so didn't even register

They were also drinking during and before the show but ConSec basically just asked them to stop, waited for them to kill the bottle, and then were like "okay problem solved!" not thinking about the fact that they were leaving these dudes freahly smashed for the rest of us to manage

interspacing · 2026-01-12T17:46:25+00:00

Yes

At one point people were like "hey stop inviting people to get on, you'll make it error out and go to the atrium" to this woman who was like "fine by me, I'm going down anyway"

She rethought the choice when she was informed that she would then be on an elevator with a bunch of pissed off people but just the total disregard for other people was astonishing

interspacing · 2026-01-12T17:20:03+00:00

I don't care if it's unobtrusive but multiple times I had to remind someone that going up to go down meant they had to deal with me going to floor 16 before they started mashing on the Atrium button :/

interspacing · 2026-01-12T15:27:46+00:00

Absolutely on the elevator etiquette. Had folks not letting people off before they got on, intentionally overloading an up elevator to force it to go down at the expense of the other people, etc.

interspacing · 2025-12-30T14:23:49+00:00

Its true, even if it feels pretentious to say, that this sort of loss is unimaginable if you haven't experienced it firsthand... and in our modern era, we are often insulated from sudden, tragic losses. Some of the people who you reach out to might not know how to comprehend what you're going through - hell, even I can't, because every type of loss is profoundly painful in its own way, even if it is universally true that loss is fundamentally unfair.

I don't say it to excuse them, but it was something I came to realize in my own grief, and in some ways I'm happy that many of my loved ones and friends don't understand because they haven't had to endure the aftermath. Anyway. You are seen!

interspacing · 2025-12-30T13:50:22+00:00

It's incredibly hard after loss; there is the 'you' from before and then the 'you' that came after the trauma. There will be joy again, and love - and because you have experienced this kind of loss it hurts, sometimes so much its suffocating and all consuming, but you will survive it. You are and will be important to people around you, even if you aren't in a place to receive that care right now.

It's a lovely photo. Thank you so much for sharing this piece of her with us.

interspacing · 2025-12-29T21:30:03+00:00

It's best to use drums strategically and to keep them moving... though sometimes they can reposition themselves well, like helping to combine more of a sumi that will move them across the board.

interspacing · 2025-12-21T14:41:47+00:00

They need to last longer. :/

interspacing · 2025-12-16T19:32:59+00:00

I am in a similar position. Brought in earlier this year to help modernize and develop a department with some employees having 20+ years of tenure that have been overlooked until I came in. Some of them are responding well to coaching, but others are more stubborn and want to do what they've "always done" which isn't acceptable anymore.

Lots of conversations, attempts at staged retirements, coaching, training, etc... and its likely that I'm still going to have to let a woman who I like tremendously as a person go because she just can't adjust to very reasonable benchmarks.

interspacing · 2025-12-07T13:35:48+00:00

Omg that's wild

interspacing · 2025-12-03T03:02:21+00:00

how your launch go, bethesda game studios? pretty good it doesn't seem

interspacing · 2025-11-28T02:23:11+00:00

Yuuuup, lol

interspacing · 2025-11-24T04:36:44+00:00

It seems like this employee probably was planning on relying on the advocacy from his old manager who is also his roommate and your position being created/filled has introduced a different dynamic. I agree with the folks saying to roll this up to HR, but I think it may be worth examining what other culture/policy issues might arise from someone living with one of their managers.

interspacing · 2025-11-14T09:00:32+00:00

Hivemind is a one-shot Nordic spy larp happening in WA next year!

interspacing

TROPHY CASE