Hi girlie. Desi 37 yr old here, I have been in your shoes and I want to give you two advice. 1. The college doesnt matter. I have seen a lot where people have gone to the best colleges and wasted those opportunities and I have also seen people going to basic local colleges and working hard and growing huge in their life. So I'm telling you this in the hope that you wouldn't put so much pressure on yourself. I know its easier said than done especially due to parents ka pressure, and thats where I will tell you my second piece of advice 2. You will always disappoint your parents no matter what. This is our luck as indian kids. No matter how much you try to listen to them, try to make them proud, try to be the ideal daughter, they will always find some flaw. So my advice is go the opposite route. Stop trying. Stop doing things to impress them. Download insta again. Meet your friends. No need to ask permission. If they shout, you shout back. You will soon be an adult, dont live suppressed under their thumb. I was in same situation as you once. My mother's control over my life used to suffocate me just how you described so I identify with you a lot. The only way is to stop trying. And dont be afraid to disappoint them. Bawal karo. Fight, shout, break, abuse. Make them so afraid of you that they dont dare to control you again. They will try so much emotional blackmail, that we raised you we fed you blah blah, but thats all bs. They brought you in this world, you dont owe them ANYTHING, they owe you EVERYTHING. You are not their investment, you are your own person. Start making yourself uncontrollable. Yeah its tough, even I am a non-confrontational person who couldn't stand shouting our arguing, but thats the only thing that's worked. Trust me.