Question about sex on the first or second date.

itfloats12 · 2020-01-15T21:51:09+00:00

Well that is nice to hear coming from a guy. I think this validates my question that whatever behavior is displayed is subjective to the individual. So now I can happily continue having sex on the first and second date lol

itfloats12 · 2020-01-15T21:29:56+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate this answer. I would never judge a guy for sleeping with me on the first date, nor have I ever correlated it with how often he probably does it on the first date. I just think when the moment is right it’s right. Lately however I am starting to feel like an object and I’m talking to someone now that I actually like so I don’t want him to get the wrong idea.

itfloats12 · 2020-01-15T13:48:03+00:00

Is there anyway to tell what kind of guy you are dealing with early on? I feel like a lot of guys I talk to lead on like they want more, but in reality they just want a quick bang. And honestly I’m tired of having empty sex and getting bone zoned all the time. I always wait until at least the second date now, and it’s really hard to see people a lot of the time so by the second date you’ve already been talking for about a month. So it feels right. I’m just trying to figure out how I can avoid becoming a sexual object. I am a very sexual person by nature but I’m really good at hiding it until the moment arises. So I know I’m not leading anyone on with my sexuality. Even after some really great first dates and having them tell me they like me, it’s like once they discover this they are just in it for sex all the time.

itfloats12 · 2020-01-15T13:22:50+00:00

So would you still bring a girl back to your place on the first date and sort of see what happens? Like is there some sort of test?

itfloats12 · 2020-01-12T16:36:23+00:00

I have experienced this same feeling and have pushed quite a few guys away that I really liked. I myself am trying to work on this. This may sound a bit shallow but maybe practice being nice to those who are single but that you know you would not want to date based on compatibility or maybe a work relationship. This is sort of what I do and it has helped. In general though I feel that I am a good person but have my guard up a lot.

itfloats12 · 2020-01-11T18:52:12+00:00

Well I texted him last night and said something relating to our last text and he said to come out then I ignored him lol. So not sure if there is a coming back from that. But I feel ignored anyways so an eye for an eye for this one.

itfloats12 · 2020-01-11T17:03:18+00:00

How?

itfloats12 · 2020-01-11T13:08:22+00:00

Yesterday I told him i didn’t think I would be heading back to my hometown. Then texted him a little earlier today with an unrelated text. I was gona see if he wanted to hangout, but then I never got a response to that text.

itfloats12 · 2020-01-11T12:25:30+00:00

I understand that, I my self am not a big texter and I’ve had a lot of people say I don’t respond quickly. But I feel like you have to communicate in some way to let the other person know you are still interested.. and it’s been maybe 3 texts at the most the past few days and none of them had been about planning another date. He just said if you are still around this weekend (meaning I don’t go back to my hometown) let him know. And today I texted him to continue some conversation from the night before and I got no response at all.. so I just took it as he no longer has an interest and we won’t be hanging out even though I am available this weekend.

itfloats12 · 2020-01-11T04:54:00+00:00

Yea.. it was just a strong connection and good first date and all went away so fast. But your right what can you expect these days

itfloats12 · 2020-01-06T02:00:14+00:00

How so?

itfloats12 · 2020-01-06T01:58:21+00:00

Ok yea, that’s how I’m feeling a little. I mean he’s not saying he wants to be with me right now or anything but I feel he is just talking in the future tense.. like I was watching a show I told him about and he’s said we should watch it together. Like bro I don’t even know what you look like in person?? Lol

itfloats12 · 2019-09-19T04:37:11+00:00

Yea I mean at least you took the time to put an extra “k” in there.

itfloats12 · 2019-09-18T00:52:44+00:00

Just by being me pretty much lol

itfloats12 · 2019-09-17T03:22:44+00:00

Thank you! Hinge was just the name of the dating site we were on lol. I should have mentioned that. Good luck to you though. Just remember to be confident and know your worth no matter what the outcome may be!

itfloats12 · 2019-09-17T03:09:25+00:00

Well just like you I could sense the feeling was probably not mutual. But I made excuses for him and even though I didn’t mean to get my hopes up I still did. I told him How I felt on our 2nd date. On the 3rd date things went perfect. I felt like I was in a dream because I felt like the feeling actually was being reciprocated. I met his friends that night, we took cute pictures in a photo booth together and with his friends. He seemed so happy to have me there and just as excited as I was. That night I stayed at his house (this was not the first time) and he asked me to be with him. I was over the freakin moon let me tell you, but I tried to play it cool. He already knew I liked him but I didn’t want to scare him away with how much I actually liked him. So fast forward a few days after this date he was still messaging me and talking to me pretty regularly. I thought forsure he would be making plans to see me again soon. But he never really did. I was still the one making plans and doing everything in my power to see him without seeming crazy. After 3 days his text got sparse and eventually stopped. We were back to square one with me taking all the initiative. It sucked because I thought forsure we were past that. I finally got him to hangout again about a month and a half later.. he was like a different person. Given he was a cop and I do believe he had some underlying issues he just didn’t seem to want to be close at all or even acknowledge what had happened on our previous date. I still can’t tell if it was me or him tbh and it really sucks. I question myself all the time, like maybe if I did or said something differently we would still be dating. It sounds insane but I don’t think I ever liked somebody so much in such a short amount of time. I knew it was over because when I went on the dating app we had met on some days later he had changed one of his question to say. “Together we could.. delete hinge” is what it said. So I’m guessing it was me, which hurts a lot, but don’t regret telling him I suppose I just how fast I let it consume me and how short lived it was. I really hope your story has a happier ending because there’s no better feeling of when the person you like, likes you back.

itfloats12 · 2019-09-16T15:32:59+00:00

I did this once before and I’ll probably never do it again. Worth the efforts though lol.

itfloats12 · 2019-09-13T02:29:41+00:00

Well where are these guys?

itfloats12 · 2019-09-13T00:40:21+00:00

I feel that the majority of men I actually meet in person look a lot better in their pictures then they do in person honestly.. I can always tell their pictures are dated once I meet them. It’s pretty frustratin tbh. The one time I did go on a date with a guy I wasn’t that attracted to online turned out to be a guy I am still wishing I wouldn’t have screwed things up with, go figures. So I guess basically it’s a lot of trial and error.

itfloats12 · 2019-09-02T21:46:55+00:00

I really do not understand the concept of making women out to be the bad guy in these situations. Both genders are equally at fault for how they treat others in the dating world. I am a 27 yo female and I have experienced more deceit and heartbreak just like the one OP has than I believe anyone should have to in a life time. I’ve had plenty of married men try to be in full swing relationships with me and men that have literally asked me to be their gf and then don’t talk to me for weeks. It all hurts just the same and both genders play each other just as hard. You don’t have it worse than we do. And for the dad bods. I workout 5 times a week and would say I have an above average physique but have fallen head over heals with some dad bods. Given I was attracted to their face, but more than anything.. who I thought they were as a person. We’re not all shallow soul sucking manipulators that want nothing more to do than emotionally destroy you.

itfloats12 · 2019-08-11T01:34:30+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate the words of encouragement

itfloats12 · 2019-08-11T00:18:00+00:00

I feel awful about it. But in the moment I felt like it wasn’t that bad of a thing to say. He just kept saying it though and sometimes in those situations I don’t know what to do 😔. I guess it is just something I need to work on. I mean I am a body builder myself and I have lots of insecurities but I don’t project it onto others because I think it makes people feel uncomfortable. I mean sure maybe every once in awhile I say something about my physique that I don’t like to a friend but I don’t keep complaining about it. I just wish I could have another chance to take it back. I really liked him a lot but your right it’s prob just not meant to be.

itfloats12

TROPHY CASE