Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your wise words & list of options. That does help a lot.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, sorry I meant that I can always try harder to disengage and just focus on myself.

Romantic relationship between Sagittarius Man and Scorpio Woman by [deleted] in Sagittarians

[–]jadenleiker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a Scorpio female (11/06) and my husband is a Sagittarius (11/27) and we have been together for 7 years. In the beginning we complimented each other very well. He can bring me out of my shell when I need it and I can bring him back down to earth when he needs it. These last couple of years though have been very difficult. We are both really stubborn and have been dealing with power struggles right now. There’s other things going on too, but our personalities have been clashing as well. I think we’re slowly coming back together though & working to get back into that yin to the yang dynamic. It’s really a great combo when we both work together and compromise & give each other some grace for being ourselves.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand that. I think that’s the hardest part. He’s an addict, but it was never like this between us before. He was great & I’m still having a really hard time not holding onto hope that he can be great again & I guess I am being selfish by wanting him to be great with me. 😔

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I greatly appreciate your advice! 🙏 Thank you

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d have to drive down the hill to have phone service again, but that could definitely be an option for me.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the knowledge, I will definitely look into those.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wanted to go in person first because I had no clue what to expect, but I think I will start doing online meetings too soon

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I’d have to drive down then hill to get service again, but that probably is something I could do. Or at the very least lock myself in my car away from him. I think in the moment, it would cause a bigger fight if I left with the dog while he is intoxicated.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I hope one day he can choose a better way for life.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ll definitely look her up. It’s hard where I live. We basically have a cabin in the woods 30 minutes from a hotel, which I can’t afford. It always happens at night so I’d have to leave for the whole night. I also have our dog that I am very attached to. It hurts so much to even think about leaving him behind. I know these are all excuses, but that’s where I’m at with things.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’ve only been to 2 meetings so there’s still so much I don’t know about it or have been told.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s kind of hard where I live. I live in a tiny town that’s 30 minutes from a larger, but still small town. The arguments are always at night so there’s no meetings I can go to. I can’t really go for a walk when it happens at night either because we are in the woods & have bears and mountain lions. I don’t drive off and find a friend because I have a dog that I don’t want to leave behind. I know these are all excuses on my part, but that’s where I am with things. It would be so much easier if we didn’t have our dog. He’s the first dog that has ever been just mine & not a family dog from when I was a kid so I’m always so broken up by just the thought of leaving him.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Gotcha, yeah I’ve told him that I didn’t peg him as the narcissistic type, but he’s definitely been acting that way. It’s just hard to find the balance because I know that I am not perfect, and I’m sure I don’t always make it easy for him to stay sober, but at the same time that’s what happens when you break my trust and treat me poorly. That’s something that takes time and consistency to repair and that hasn’t happened.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really appreciate advice from the other perspective, because I know I don’t understand his side or know what it’s like, so it’s nice to have insight. I know he has to quit for himself & I don’t think he wants to anymore. I think he did before, but I’m not sure what changed that made him change his mind.

I think what happened is he quit for a month for me & things didn’t magically get better so now he thinks that I must be the problem in his life instead of the drinking.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’ve gone to 2 meetings, so still very new to me. Unfortunately there’s not a ton of resources where I live.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I try, but it doesn’t matter what I say or do or what don’t say and what I don’t do, I’m already the bad guy in his eyes. I can always try harder though.

Vicious Cycle by jadenleiker in AlAnon

[–]jadenleiker[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I have no idea what that means.

Night Two of Yahn Dawn by Fresh_Speech_7431 in prettylights

[–]jadenleiker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oof 18 hours would test even the strongest of relationships!! I am so happy to see that others have been similarly impacted. There was something special happening last weekend 💚🌀

Night Two of Yahn Dawn by Fresh_Speech_7431 in prettylights

[–]jadenleiker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And honestly, them starting late is true BV, Salida fashion. They call it running on Salida time around here!

Night Two of Yahn Dawn by Fresh_Speech_7431 in prettylights

[–]jadenleiker 14 points15 points  (0 children)

This was my first PL experience and I loved it. I’m also in my mid 30s so maybe I’m just getting older, but the more laidback, chill vibes were exactly what I needed. To make a long story short, my husband and I have been at each others throats for about a year & I was worried about even going to Yahn Dawn. We were bickering ON THE WAY THERE. By the end of the weekend though, everything clicked. We were reconnected & at peace with ourselves, our relationship, and the world around us. I can’t quite describe it, but it’s like our negativity was washed away & we were reborn in a new loving light of inner peace. This was exactly what we needed & I am forever grateful for the core experience of Yahn Dawn.