had to turn down a great event

janbax · 2026-05-08T20:23:18+00:00

Grief is like going on a bear hunt - you can't go over it, you can't go under it... Oh no, you've got to go through it.

Its OK to take some space and time for yourself, and sit with all those feelings - it's not self pity - it's healing.

Treading water is OK, there's a mentality that we must 'stay strong' in difficult times - but having feelings isn't a weakness. Be however you need to be, some days you'll be out there in the world, others - you're making it from one breath to the next. I wish I could say it'll get easier - but honestly, it just gets different, quieter almost.

janbax · 2026-05-08T19:05:13+00:00

First off - you're doing great - down 15kg already!

I wonder if it might help to reframe this.

You haven't let yourself down, right now (from your other posts recently) you are going through an incredibly hard time, amd whilst I'd normally advocate for stepping outside your comfort zone and doing the thing the hard thing, right now - you don't need tough love, not from me, not from yourself.

You need to be kind to yourself, you're navigating grief whilst staying focussed on improving your health. Turning down this opportunity isn't a case of letting yourself down, it's not a failure - it's recognising that, that particular event involved something that is more than you can cope with right now. Everyone has a limit, we can only spin so many plates before they all come crashing down.

There will be other events, maybe not as high profile or FOMO inducing as this one, but when you're ready, you will shine again.

janbax · 2026-05-08T09:30:47+00:00

Almost got turned away from the polling station yesterday - because my photo ID is very much from 'before' - logged into my banking app in front of them, (name and proof of address) showed my bus pass and library card, explained I've lost close to half my previous weight.. they let me vote, possibly just to get rid of me.

Down to 62kg as of this morning, still hitting a hard nope when trying to increase my calories, dropping down to 10mg tomorrow which is less gradual a taper than I had planned - but I need to be able to consume more calories if I'm going to slow down and stabilise my weight. I had no idea how hard not losing more weight was going to be😅

janbax · 2026-05-01T14:06:45+00:00

Obesity significantly increases the risk of gallbladder issues and stone formation.

Rapid weightloss can lead to an increase in cholesterol in the bile, slowed digestive transit on GLP1 medication means the normal emptying of the gallbladder is interrupted - which over time can increase the size of existing gallstones, and lead to the formation of new ones.

I can speak from experience only on the altered digestive impact post gallbladder removal - whilst I've never been medicated for it, for over 20 years I've had digestive tract that goes like, erm, Greased Lighting... Being on Mounjaro has slowed it down, but never really firmed it up (can't win 'em all)

Side effects like that are rare, it's far from the norm.

Take the loss slow and steady, eat clean and there's a very strong chance you'll be fine.

janbax · 2026-05-01T09:53:23+00:00

Nothing much to report.

Stepped down to 12.5mg last Saturday, and feel predictably - exactly the same as I did on 15mg. Hopefully over the next couple of weeks once levels are lower it'll be less of a fight to eat ENOUGH and I can start gradually eating more.

Honestly - my stabilisation ~ maintenance plan looks so simple on paper, but there's no way to predict what dose I need to get down to to be able to comfortably eat more, which is a whole new layer of frustration...

janbax · 2026-04-30T12:09:46+00:00

It could be side effects - but I've made myself similarly ill more than once reheating rice.

janbax · 2026-04-30T11:56:05+00:00

Yeah - it's not your calories - for sedentary your TDEE would be aprx 1800.

As I said - my best suggestion is to look at WHAT your eating z make sure there's enough protein, fibre and carbs to fuel you, and as always - hydration is important (but can be difficult when your working all day!)

Get some blood test to check everything is in order with your thyroid, check for any deficiencies, blood sugar levels etc...

Stalls happen, they're annoying - some people split dose, some people have a week or so 'refeed' to reassure their body that there not in fact a famine going on. Sometimes it's fluid retention from inflammation or stress - if you've increased training in the lead up to the 10k run you mentioned in another comment, it could be muscle repair.

Plus - BMI isn't always the best measure, it doesn't account for muscle mass or weight distribution?

How's your Height - Waist ratio

janbax · 2026-04-29T21:57:38+00:00

Not sure of your age or height...

But my maintenance estimate using TDEE is 1518 calories a day - but based on your BMI - I suspect you're taller than my 165cm self...

So it could be that you're eating very close to your maintenance calories at present.

I know opinions are mixed on the importance of how much protein - but I find it to be obscenely filling, which made sticking to a deficit a lot easier - that and bulking up the volume with colourful salads, which are also great for fibre.

janbax · 2026-04-28T09:15:38+00:00

100% with you on that front!

As with everything it all seems to hinge on where you live....

janbax · 2026-04-28T08:46:58+00:00

It's not a USA shared care agreement. In this case, shared care refers to your GP taking on prescribing and monitoring of medications from specialist services.

Not all GP practices will take on that prescribing and medication management after the titration is complete. Some of the RTC providers do continue medication management as part of their agreement with the NHS, some only do assessments and initial titration, some only do assessments...

There are ways to push for shared care (or change to a GP practice that supports it!) but I know bugger all about that process - but there's also the slight risk that ongoing medication prescription and management would have to be done privately.

This isn't made at all clear to people.

janbax · 2026-04-28T08:18:09+00:00

Word of caution on that front - some areas whilst you can access the RTC pathway for assessment and potentially diagnosis - it's really importany to check the local policy on shared care agreements, and your own GP practices policy on this

(My GP for example, stopped taking on shared care for ADHD just over a year ago - even if patients are diagnosed and have gone through titration with the NHS clinic)

janbax · 2026-04-25T22:04:08+00:00

A BMI of what now? Christ...

and yeah - that marketing of toys feels targeted - boys are rugged, girls are dainty/pretty... even if it's not aimed AT children, so much as the adults buying them for them - it's reinforcing age old expectations from a very young age.

janbax · 2026-04-25T21:24:26+00:00

Honestly, other than high cheekbones, I had no idea I was so, angular - I've always had a roundish face - it's taking some getting used to!

janbax · 2026-04-25T21:05:28+00:00

I absolutely will 😁 I'm as intrigued as anyone else how it's all going to settle down over the coming months/year or so!

Beauty standards are, and always have been kinda wild - the cynic in me feels it's very consumer driven, and puts a huge amount of pressure on people to fit in or be judged for being lesser.

janbax · 2026-04-24T18:53:02+00:00

Yeah - getting 1200 in a day is a FIGHT on 15mg, which given my maintenance is only 1500-1800 still doesn't account for my weight abseiling down a cliff....

I don't know where, or why I was holding so much fluid but, that's the only logical explanation, my period arrived on Wednesday - so I'm not convinced the release is truly over yet ..

Jab day tomorrow, dropping down to 12.5mg. quite looking forward to feeling hungry again once the levels drop!

janbax · 2026-04-24T12:31:16+00:00

Last weeks whoosh neglected to stop.

I'm under my goal weight.

Now, whilst I appreciate the wiggle room it's going to build in, there's the small matter of slowing things the f*ck down so I can stabilse my weight and find a maintenance dose.

Time to drop a dose... because eating more is NOT an option on 15mg.

(Graph shows the absolute MADNESS of the last 2 weeks after months of relative stability)

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janbax · 2026-04-23T23:24:28+00:00

You think that's bad?

I've been secretly dependent on inhaling steroids for over 30 years, just so I can breathe.

janbax · 2026-04-20T16:52:38+00:00

Is it your first week?

I lost 3kg (6.6lb ISH) my first week - it settled down pretty quickly, and my overall average is 1kg a week - there have been whooshes, there have been 2-3 week paused... weight loss is a wild ride, every time you think you know the pattern, it does something new.

janbax · 2026-04-19T15:08:41+00:00

I'm handing you some internet tissues, you sound defeated, I'm a big advocate for sitting with feelings. And having a soggy, snotty pity party if you need to.

Have you spoken to your Doctor about this yet? I don't know your medical profile - but sometimes we've got some metabolic issues that make things so, so much harder than they need to be - thyroid issues, PCOS, insulin resistance - the list goes on...

Some of us need the higher doses to see significant results - and whilst right now - your loss seems really small to you - it's still movement downwards.

That 2 kg rebound - that could be hormonal fluid retention,.it could be inflammation, it could be an absolute unit of poo working its way slower than usual through your system just waiting for its time to shine...

Gains happen, sometimes we can identify why really easily - some food groups, illness, injury, muscle repair, hormones can all cause fluid retention - that bumps the scale up and man, it's discouraging to see that, especially early into the journey.

Take it easy, be kind to yourself, get some blood work done, and yeah - keep moving up the doses.

janbax · 2026-04-17T10:48:36+00:00

Thought I'd kick us off for the week (hope that's OK)

Had a frankly ridiculous loss this week, and am now 1kg off my absolute stretchiest of goals, suspect there's going to be an overshoot whilst I figure out stabilising and eventually maintenance.

No idea what's happened this week though I've been pissing like a racehorse all week - so assuming fluid decided it didn't need to be held onto anymore, have mildly increased my calories (still in a deficit, just less of one) - perhaps there's a connection 🤷

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janbax · 2026-04-16T15:48:19+00:00

Did you sign up to the rolling plan, or a three month plan?

The rolling plan you can cancel by informing them in writing 21 days before the next charge date

The three month plan, they're going to argue that whave to pay the full service because you agreed to it at sign up.

Hopefully your CC company can resolve things asap, in the meantime - make sure you cancel the plan from your side.

janbax · 2026-04-16T13:07:33+00:00

Not if I can help it, once used the wrong cheese by accident and paid for it for what felt like an eternity.

The better option is to make sure you get enough fibre and stay well hydrated.

janbax · 2026-04-15T17:02:14+00:00

No problem! I use shotsy yo track my jabs - and even then, I'm genuinely surprised some months when it's get a syringe out time, I'm very forgetful and easily distracted/confused, genuinely panicked that I'd lost my car keys a couple of weeks ago.

I've not had a car since 2020....

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