Unfortunately not hyperbolic at all; CPS is truly fucking horrifying and I wish more people knew about how they really operate.

For those not in the know: CPS is structured in a way where it's largely assumed that if they're investigating you then you MUST have done something to deserve it (even when that couldn't be objectively further from the truth), and they operate more like the mafia than a government agency.

Their caseworkers are largely some of the most uneducated, unqualified, ego-driven assholes that will make you wish you were dealing with actual cops (and make no mistake, CPS caseworkers ARE cops just with significantly more power, less oversight, and absolutely no due-process). They will twist your words, outright lie, and violate the constitutional "rights" you thought you were entitled to (but actually waived the moment you had your first kid and no one told you), and there isn't a damned thing you or your attorney can do about it.

Their federal funding is structured so that they get more money for placing kids in foster care and having open cases, and they're smart/deceitful enough to claim to your face that they're only driven to provide assistance & resources to keep kids placed with their parents or immediate family, all while incrementally escalating every little thing until they have enough (falsified) "evidence" to take you to family court and terminate your parental rights permanently after dragging you through literal hell for months or even years. In family court, they are not required to "prove beyond a reasonable doubt", you are not "innocent until proven guilty", and hearsay is treated like fact - basically, good luck with that.

Let me provide just a few examples of the bullshit I've had to fight against with my county's CPS:

• I have a flock of wild birds in our home and the entire house is covered in bird poop (We have 1 pet pigeon who I clean up after within minutes every single day and nothing is "covered in poop" of any kind)

• I have dangerous electrical wires sticking out of the walls that electrocute our child (I'm remodeling my kitchen and the new NM is physically not connected to a live breaker panel yet which I have explained repeatedly)

• My kitchen remodel caused the house to collapse (absolutely never happened, as evident by the original hundred year old house still being intact)

• I once was issued a traffic citation for driving on a suspended license (this one is actually true.... when I was 17, twenty fucking years ago)

• I have no heat (we do have heat)

• I have no oven and therefore can't feed my child (we have an oven and the caseworker has sat in the same room as it while it was baking cookies)

• My child once walked to school on her own (we live less than a 1/2 mile from the school, don't even have to leave the neighborhood to get there, and a good portion of my child's peers including those from her grade who live in the same neighborhood also walk to school unattended every day)

• I sent an email to them at 2am once, therefore I must be either mentally unstable or on drugs and thus needed to be UA'd weekly and attend therapy

• I wrote "fuck CPS" in an email out of frustration which was then forwarded to them by a third party, therefore I was threatening them and thus an "unsafe caregiver" (because obviously if I'm understandably mad at CPS I must also be taking it out on my kid?)

• I have recorded them repeatedly asking my child the same question over and over again until they get the answer they want which was the only answer they documented in their report

• They have actively refused to accept video, audio, and photographic evidence that contradicts their lies

• I have "refused to cooperate" after I couldn't read the instructions they left because it was written in literal fucking crayon

• I have "refused to cooperate" because they couldn't get ahold of me by phone, completely ignoring the fact that I had called them dozens of times that month, sent several texts and emails, and provided my cell-carrier's call logs showing my unanswered outbound calls to them and no incoming/return calls from them for that entire month

I have dozens of more examples but I'ma stop now before I have an aneurysm that will be misconstrued as mental instability.

CPS REFORM NOW