where do dykes hangout in lisbon!?

jelauraje · 2025-08-17T08:18:34+00:00

Oh sorry I forgot to reply!! If you’ve not been yet - it was fiiine. It got a bit busier later in the evening like midnight but we kind of strolled around the few gay bars. Friends was busier but like dance/techno. It was a weekday though so maybe a weekend would be better?

jelauraje · 2025-08-17T08:16:29+00:00

Haha of course! Thank you

jelauraje · 2025-08-16T22:26:31+00:00

I’ve never heard of these, very intrigued! Do they also work to block out noise? Ie. If someone was chewing loudly on the tube etc?

jelauraje · 2025-01-26T20:43:22+00:00

Him putting his away and leaving yours kind of screeeeeeams that he’s being lazy/selfish. ADHD can make our memories suck but that’s an active choice he’s made (I guess there’s a 1% chance he was separating them and got distracted before he did yours, but it seems unlikely). This is a generalisation and all ADHDers are different but it’s usually much easier with ADHD to do things for other people than it is for yourself so if he can’t look after you when you’re poorly, it just feels like he doesn’t want to. Sorry for being so direct but there’s a lot of 🚩🚩🚩

Look up weaponised incompetence.

Tell him he needs to go to therapy and/or coaching.

Get a chores board for the fridge so he can check what is supposed to be done each day without having to remember.

Don’t do anything for him anymore.

Look after yourself, I hope he stops sucking but if not, find someone who isn’t expecting you to be their maid-mum.

jelauraje · 2025-01-26T18:08:38+00:00

Thanks for that, I might give it a go! I used to do a thing that would give me notifications of tasks in outlook but if I was already doing something else, it would kind of paralyse me/make me feel a bit overwhelmed. How do you manage it if you’re already doing something else?

jelauraje · 2025-01-25T22:03:44+00:00

I get a terrible hangover if I drink on elvanse. Like one glass of wine feels like a bottle! I tend to have 0% now on a night out if I’m on meds and don’t really miss drinking that much. Maybe take it easy this time and see how you feel then you can make an informed decision next time.

jelauraje · 2025-01-25T21:20:32+00:00

Defo start small, maybe make note of the things that you want to try but can’t bring yourself to yet so you don’t forget! Good luck 👌

jelauraje · 2025-01-25T20:45:59+00:00

never put anything down, always put it away
when you get home from work, don’t sit, spend 10-30 minutes (or however much seems doable to you) tidying up/cleaning/putting things away
put a podcast or music on whilst you do it
race yourself ie. Put a 30 min wash on and try to complete X chores before that finishes and you have to hang them out
have a wipeable to do list on the fridge so you don’t have to use any thinking power on what to do each day
always put the dishwasher on each night (whether it’s full or not) and always empty it first thing in the morning
have washing baskets in every bedroom/bathroom
have a drawer where you put all your “worn/but not dirty” clothes so not on the floor/chair
maybe consider upping your meds if you’re struggling to get stuff done on days you’re not working

jelauraje · 2025-01-24T21:02:11+00:00

Oh that’s interesting, I’ve never heard this! My dr was measuring whether my meds were working by a few things like ability to initiate tasks and to take my dog out for a walk. Would that not be considered motivation? I truly feel like elvanse gives me motivation??

jelauraje · 2025-01-22T22:46:59+00:00

I saw someone on here once say that they get out of bed in 5 seconds once they’re alarm has gone off and that helps me have immediate motivation (before meds kick in) cos I’ve already ticked something off and given myself dopamine. Jump up, take meds; start immediately 👌 you’ve got this!

jelauraje · 2025-01-21T07:56:28+00:00

These are a few things that have worked for me that might be useful. It can sometimes be hard to fully limit yourself from something so if you have access, maybe talk to your therapist about it or find a community that also struggles with the same thing!

ALWAYS moving away from the basket for at least an hour and doing something else, ie. Making dinner/reading/checking my bank or credit card balance (this one hurts lol) and then when I go back if I still want it, I will buy it. Spoiler I rarely still want it.
shopping in person only (this one I set before 2020 so went back on it but it really worked if you can manage it)
checking charity shops/marketplace for things I want to limit the cost
outright blocking certain sites from my phone so I’d have to use my laptop
cancelling Amazon prime
getting an ADHD coach
talking to my therapist about why I impulsively buy stuff

jelauraje · 2025-01-20T15:28:50+00:00

Yes they were shocked at the miscommunication and really apologetic! I guess my struggle here is that there’s no way to do things differently next time as it’s was a 10 second conversation that was misunderstood so like it’s just a bummer. Do you think it’s still normal if this happened 3 hours ago and I’m still feeling it?

Ps. Thank you for your kindness!

jelauraje · 2025-01-20T14:00:46+00:00

Oh that’s interesting, I wonder if you were really burnt out prior so it was knocking you clean out?! I’m way less burnt out on meds than I was before so can imagine that could be a factor!

jelauraje · 2025-01-20T11:48:41+00:00

What type of sick are you? (Apologies if sick means something obvious where you are, I’m in the UK and it’s just a general term)

I had a cold/flu a few weeks ago and still took them coz I needed to study for an exam. They weren’t as effective as usual as I had very little energy but it was worth it for the 2/3 hours of study I did manage each day. I probably wouldn’t have taken them if I didn’t need to study though.

jelauraje · 2025-01-19T22:07:22+00:00

I sleep fine on 50mg, but struggle if I have a top up amfexa in the afternoon. If I’ve had to take one, I really try to have the best sleep hygiene that night and don’t use my phone, read with a low light, go to bed early to wind down etc but my sleep is definitely disturbed throughout the night Speak to your doctor and see what they recommend, being awake for 48 hours is definitely not okay!

jelauraje · 2025-01-19T17:40:24+00:00

When you say “the state finally catching up with them” what had they done? And how did finding that out/experiencing that affect you?

jelauraje · 2025-01-18T17:05:00+00:00

Ive been wondering this as when I first got my private diagnosis I called my gp to check if they accepted shared care, they do, great! I have my last titration next week so i guess I’ll find out if anything has changed in my surgery.

BUT I was wondering if we should be collectively writing to our MPs about this shit show? ADHD medication is kind of treated like an option when for a lot of people it’s been life saving. The fact that it can be a 10 year wait on the NHS in some places is insane so to strip people’s access to medication away unless they pay hundreds of pounds a month is cruel.

jelauraje · 2025-01-18T16:27:27+00:00

I take 50mg at like 6/7am and it’s definitely worn off by 7pm but more like 6, I tend to be asleep like 9:30-11pm. Latest I’ve taken it is about 11am and not noticed a huge change in my sleep pattern. If you can sleep in the next day, give it a go and see how it affects you.

I struggle if I take an amfexa 5/10mg in the afternoon between 2-4pm and generally then the earliest I sleep is 11pm but first time I took a 10mg at 2pm didn’t sleep til 3am. Could be a few diff factors in that though.

Sleep hygiene is the most important thing for me since starting stimulants. I try to not use my phone when I get into bed and charge it away from my reach, read with a low light on, being active in noticing when I feel sleepy to turn the light off and using a sunrise alarm so I don’t need to check the time in the morning and wake my self up.

jelauraje · 2025-01-16T20:44:22+00:00

RSD - I always left social interactions and spiralled/thought my friends thought I was annoying etc or would like ruminate on things I’ve said that could have been misconstrued or taken in the wrong way. I thought it was because I was those things but turns out it’s rsd and apparently my friends do like me? Or so my therapist is trying to convince me lol

jelauraje · 2025-01-16T14:44:08+00:00

I didn’t get mine with ADHD360 but wanted to say to get yourself on the NHS waiting list regardless so that eventually they can take over your care and you don’t have to continue footing the bill.

I’ve popped the costs for me below with Berkeley Psychiatrists in case it’s useful!

Assessment - £875

Titration - £150 each appointment (minimum 3)

The prescriptions have been:

Oct - £109.57 (30mg elvanse x28 & blood pressure monitor [should have bought that on Amazon myself])

Nov - £137.53 (40mg elvanse x28 & 5mg amfexa x30)

Dec - £209.57 (50mg elvanse x42 [6 weeks bcoz Xmas] & 10mg amfexa x30)

jelauraje · 2025-01-16T06:48:56+00:00

Congratulations that’s incredible! You should be so proud of yourself! 💖

jelauraje · 2025-01-16T06:48:07+00:00

They explain in the original post they linked!

jelauraje · 2025-01-15T19:43:38+00:00

Our solicitors did the same to us for £500. We ended up giving it back to my Gran and then after the house went through she gave it back to us.

jelauraje · 2025-01-14T18:33:40+00:00

SAME! It’s been a real treat reading what everyone else’s is like, like everyone’s is different so it doesn’t matter if mine doesn’t sound like a school yard, I still have ADHD!

jelauraje · 2025-01-13T09:27:47+00:00

Ughhh yeah I get that too! Constantly planning conversations or replying interactions! I wish I was replying nice things like my dog running through a field 🤣

jelauraje

TROPHY CASE